Why are there no bi guys?

I've met a ton of bi women but I've noticed guys either tend to be completely gay or completely straight. Obviously there are exceptions but i'm talking majority here. Another thing, you always hear about straight girls wanting to experiment but guys NEVER do. It is usually guys who take homophobia to the extreme too, obviously there are women out there who think it is wrong but it doesn't bother them in the same way even if they are Christian and think of it as a sin. Why do you think all that is??

even other women can't resist....

A lot of people are bi phobic. Bisexual people in general are viewed as promiscuous and more likely to cheat and leave you for a (insert opposite gender) and bi men are considered especially dangerous (in terms of stds)

granted there are a LOT of "bisexual" people who just do that sort of thing because it is "in" now... but I've met a few true bisexuals and they are not that way at all.

just to be cool? I think it's more likely that many people who are bisexual, eventually identify as straight once they are in committed relationships with the opposite gender. Once you find something that works, why keep swimming against a societal pressure?
Dan savage once said, that any woman who identified as pansexual should just never come out to her parents because she'd end up married to a man and living in the suburbs anyway.

but there's a theory that men are hardwired to be one way or another, while women might have sexual wiring that's a bit more, umm, free.

I've known (and dated) a few bi guys. I myself have identified as a bi guy in my teens. And of all of those guys I still know, I've never seen any of them dating a woman. I'm sure that some will call me a bi-phobe or some such term, but color me skeptical.

interesting. and I think most guys will just say they are bi if they are not secure enough to admit to themselves and others that they are homosexual... no offense...

I think it's funny how as a society we're falling back to the pre victorian view of women as walking bundles of uncontrolled sexual desire. Still oppressive but better than pretending that good girls don't think such thoughts.

Sometimes it's just dumb to get into deep discussion about this thing unless everyone in the discussion has psychology and/or anthropoligy degrees.

is that we view men and women differently

there's no WAY they're willing to go back... :evilgrin:

"How ya' gonna keep 'em down on the farm, after they've seen Paree?"

:toast: :yourock:

there's more than a little truth to it :)

One invited me on a cross-country trip in some sort of trucking fashion :shrug:

I've read that in two different books. A woman's reproductive goal is producing a few offspring who will survive until reproductive age. In a harsher environment, getting them to survive was half the battle. Men, in a harsher environment, tended to get themselves killed. Alpha type males tended towards not being monagamous and often would leave. A woman who would mate with men, but have a more steady partner (a woman) to help raise her children would have an advantage. It is also why some women change orientations, heterosexual to lesbian later than men. They've had a chance to reproduce a couple times and can now settle down with a more faithful partner.
I don't know if this stuff is true or not, like I said, I read it in two different books written from two different perspectives.

do you have the book titles?

1.The Red Queen:Sex and the Evolution of Human Nature by Matt Ridley
2.The First Sex:The Naturual Talents of Women and How They Are Changing the World by Helen Fisher

<eom>

often you'll hear men comment on bisexuals as 'indecisive', 'not picking a team', or 'not knowing what the hell they want' or something equally stupid. it's a social thing, which explains a lot of male behavior - there's a hell of a lot of self-policing. men hate it when the group gets 'outta line', which explains the fascinating phenomenon of men closing rank in battles of the sexes. whereas women will actually think about the issue/struggle, and eventually in-fight vying for power either from within women or outside among men trying to put forth their approach, men rarely have such power struggles in battle of sexes. they close rank, immediately tally status, have a spokesmen, whip, leader, punchingbag, etc. very fascinating, the self-policing men do. very sad though, a lot of personal freedom and identity is sacrificed for the sake of order, organization, belonging, and power.

There is "biphobia" in both the gay and non-gay communities. "Bi" people are often viewed as "confused," "promiscuous," and/or "predatory." But, men are less likely to admit to same-sex attraction because of the stigma. There is a stigma for women, but it is much less because non-gay men have eroticized female-on-female action. If they did realize that lesbians really do not want to preform for men, they would become more hostile.

They're just a bit more in the closet about it than women. (My observation anyway.)

In fact, a bi friend of mine was talking recently about being forced into the closet as a bisexual because he currently only dates men. He doesn't feel safe talking about bisexual feelings or desires or issues among gay men or straight men, and there aren't that many openly bi men for him to associate with.

Oh wait. I mean bicycles. I hate bicycles. Not bisexuals. Sorry.

they just don't make a big deal of it, and tend to be discrete.

As for why men are more homophobic, at least in violently acting out, it's a matter of socialization. These people have a warped view of what makes a man-sensitive, gentle men are 'gay' in their lexicon; unfeeling, brutal oafs are 'real men'. When they have feelings of sensitivity, these folks freak out because they have mistakenly thought these traits are 'gay' rather than human. At least that's my take on it. So to hide these obviously human traits that they have misnamed, these oafs have to be brutal to 'prove' their manhood.

on the way to finally coming out and accepting themselves as gay. It seems to be some step to acceptance.

My best friend is a bi guy - he's married and has kids but does lean more toward guys. He really wanted kids though and wanted them to have a mom. His wife knows all this and is very cool about it.

My guy is bi as well but leans more toward women. I'm bi but lean more toward men. Makes threesomes fairly easy to arrange....

sorry that was the one word that jumped out at me in your post :P

If you feel like trolling the archives, you'll find that I'm plenty vocal about being a bisexual man happily married to a bisexual woman :)

FYI, there are plenty of bi-men (especially in northern California), but most tend to downplay it around gays and straights because we tend to catch shit from both sides. Many gay men see bisexual men as "not really gay", and some actively work to exclude bi men from gay events. The straights, on the other hand, still see us as gay and hang on all the hateful baggage that goes along with the title.

So bi's tend to be a little less open about their sexuality than everyone else and form mini communities. Since we're less open about our sexuality and the community sees us with women, most people simply assume we're straight and leave us alone.

but here goes anyway.

How many straight women do you know that find two guys making out (or further) sexy in the same way that straight men find two girls making out (and further) sexy?

I think it has something to do with the way the female form is shown as the sexy one. I think that that fact may have something to do with why there are so many bisexual women.

Just not as easy to find. (disclaimer: the following is my opinion, I never claim it to be correct, just merely mine) Perhaps because sexuality is so defined for men. You either are one thing, or you are another, there is very little room for middle ground. In the eyes of most men, there needs to be a set definition of self-identity, and being bisexual tends to cloud that definition to a more uncomfortable place than most are willing to remain. Typically, when I meet or hear about bi men, they are either "experimenting" or are in a "transition" period from straight to gay (or back again, hey it happens) and thus, puts a temporary status on their sexual identity. Something to get back to when they have the time to figure it out. Also, there is the wide-range acceptance of lesbians in the mainstream today that just isn't there for gay men. What acceptance for gay men there is, it is fiercely crusaded by an appearance of being united against the world. There's just not a massive enough embrace of the gay male culture in this country to casually visit whenever the mood strikes one, thus, it presents a situation of "all or nothing" amongst the gay male populace. Perhaps if there grew a large enough sub-culture and the mainstream found it more tolerable, then you would see more bi men abound. At least, more openly bi men.