Where do you stand on marriage?

Where do you stand on marriage?

I've been w/ hubby for 25 years, but I understand the concept, and respect it.

...marriage, ending in an acromonious and painful divorce that seems to NEVER F*CKING END, I'm not a fan of the institution at the moment. I think the next time I need to feel loved I'll adopt another kitten.

and have zero interest in marriage of any sort. Wouldn't make it legal if I could. How do I vote?

"I want no part of marriage for myself."

But if you don't - pick "other" or whichever other one you feel best suits you.

This poll has no agenda - just a timekiller.

Personally I'm in a committed hetero marriage, but I don't have real orthodox views on marriage. I don't cheat because I promised not to and it would really upset my wife. If I had married a lady who was cool with an open relationship, we'd be doing that.

I'm easygoing. I think sex is made out to be a much bigger deal than it actually is. It's fun, but big whoop.

I don't cheat because I can't. My partner knows me too well, after all this time, he knows when I have something bothering me. I couldn't dream of having sex with anyone else and hiding it from him. He'd know something was wrong immediately and I couldn't be anything but honest with him.

Makes for a really solid relationship.

I'm strait and getting out of a marriage I've been in since I was 19. When I love someone, it's not hard to for me to commit and there are certain legal benefits marriage offers, but I'm not in a hurry to do it again either. Sometimes, marriage for some of us has been about having to compromise too much and that scares me. I know I'd need a few years both to heal and to accomplish many of the things I put off before I could even consider something like that.

I guess I'll end up being a serial monogamist, but I'm not sure I need an excessive amount of episodes in my serial either. I was never one to waste my time on useless relationships with not-so-good men before I was married, and I suspect I won't after either.

"getting out of a marriage" -- my goodness, I have been away a long time. I know you've been unhappy but didn't know you'd gotten to this point. God love you, dear. :hug:

I came to this conclusion about 7 months ago (thought about for the past 6 years). It's practical matters that are holding me up. First, I had already signed up for this intensive, Summer Microbiology course I needed to complete before I could be available work-wise. Since then (the end of July), I've been trying to find something without much luck. It's not easy, but I'm beyond comfortable with the decision I made.

engagement(you cant be to sure).happily married 10 or 11 well were happily married and have lived together a quarter of a century,were we monogamous that whole time? hell no,but that was about fifth on the issue list of happiness,after the fact I'm a Christian and she's not,surviving OUR abortion in eleventh grade which at that time had just become a womans right,our marriage works i think because were still hashing it out,and loving every - well most minutes of it.marriage is a merger except frendly.

....and manipulate us on many levels....we're mere animals after all... :nopity:

#1 Widowed. #2 Divorced.

We're not monogamous by nature, but many people choose monogamy and are successful with it. Serial monogamy is also very popular, and some people are happy with that arrangement. It's harder to pull off a polyamorous relationship in our society; but those that exist in a state of equality (as opposed to some of the Morman-offshoots in rural Utah) tend to do well, as the struggle is so uphill that the people involved have to work damn hard to make it work.

I think marriage should be wrested from the hands of the state. I believe in total equality, regardless of sexual orientation, so whatever laws governing domestic partnership recognintion of straight relationships must apply equally to gay relationships -- but a "marriage" to me is between the people involved and their community of family and friends.

proven by more than 50% who have tried it.

We haven't had a ceremony, but we don't need one to be committed. We are as married as our neighbors, Butch & Liz, across the street; as married as any other couple -- with one exception, of course. We don't have a license.

.. it takes special people to find 'their other half' and work together, day-in, day-out for a lifetime, to make it last.

I know that's a skill or a gift that I do not have.



:hippie:

I think that anyone who wants to be married, be they straight or gay, should be able to. I personally have no desire to be. I've been married but didn't want to be either time - I was more or less coerced into it and eventually worn down to the point where I capitulated. It was important to the other party but not to me.

I just don't feel the need to have my personal decisions sanctioned by either church or state. To me, marriage is mostly a business contract - it stipulates possession of property and custody of children. I can take care of all of that with my own contracts, of my own writing.

I do beleive in commitment and am in a committed relationship. We have drawn up the necessary paperwork to deal with all the questions of ownership and medical care and are perfectly happy this way. My personal feeling is that marriage is an antiquated institution but there are plenty of people who feel it is important so I bow to the majority. I just don't plan on joining it.

*very* soon!

If saomeone special comes along, maybe we will get married.

ms. welshTerrier2 and I just celebrated our 27th year together ...

I view "marriage" as an institution that comes with a big pile of baggage ... it defines your relationship based on ITS definition rather than on YOUR definition ...

your relationship should be about your relationship ... it should not be about a bunch of externally imposed rules and regulations defined by the state, by religious institutions or by anybody other than the people involved in the relationship ...

I would like to see civil unions replace marriage as a legal institution ... anyone seeking to be involved in a civil union should be granted that designation solely as a legal status ... this applies to both heteros and gays ... it's way past the time for government to get the hell out of the relationship business ...

if people want to be married by a religious institution or by some type of cultural community, that's fine ... but relationships between people should not come under the government's control ...

Of course, the 3 before this one were just practice.

but regretting the choice I made every day. What I thought was love was just a desire to not be alone. 18 years later that's just not enough. I find myself with a short fuse somedays and I think it's due to the fact that selling myself short in love is eating me alive.

I'm married to a man. I have a great marriage. I am a bisexual woman. I think it's crazy that I have a whole different set of options because I happened to fall in love with a man. I could have easily ended up with someone else, but sadly, she passed away.

I think that monogamy is a good goal, but I think it's a matter of choice, not predisposition. I also think that infidelity is by far not the worst thing that can happen to a loving, committed couple. It, of course, depends on the circumstances, but a fling here and there--while not unhurtful--can be worked through and/or around. It just seems to me that it's something that has a decent chance of happening at least once to a normal, sexually alive, human being, and I wouldn't trash my whole marriage because of it. It's just not worth it.



EDIT: I know sig lines are turned off, but I wanted to see what my new sigline pic looked like in a post. This post is as good as any, so I threw it in.