I just figured out why Johnny Cash always wore black...

...skidmarks.

God bless Johnny Cash!

Man In Black: Johnny Cash.

Well, you wonder why I always dress in black;
Why you never see bright colours on my back;
And why does my appearance seem to have a sombre tone.
Well, there's a reason for the things that I have on.

I wear the black for the poor and the beaten down;
Livin' in the hopeless, hungry side of town;
I wear it for the prisoner who has long paid for his crime,
But is there because he's a victim of the times.

I wear the black for those who've never read,
Or listened to the words that Jesus said,
About the road to happiness through love and charity;
Why, you'd think He's talking straight to you and me.

Well, we're doin' mighty fine, I do suppose,
In our streak-of-lightnin' cars and fancy clothes.
But just so we're reminded of the ones who are held back,
Up front there ought to be a Man In Black.

I wear it for the sick and lonely old,
For the reckless ones whose bad trip left them cold;
I wear the black in mournin' for the lives that could have been:
Each week we lose a hundred fine young men.

And, I wear it for the thousands who have died,
Believin' that the Lord was on their side.
I wear it for another hundred thousand who have died,
Believin' that we all were on their side.

Well, there's things that never will be right I know,
And things need changin' everywhere you go.
But 'til we start to make a move to make a few things right,
You'll never see me wear a suit of white.

Ah, I'd love to wear a rainbow every day,
And tell the world that everything's OK.
But I'll try to carry off a little darkness on my back,
'Til things are brighter, I'm the Man In Black.

Written by John R. Cash.
(© Bug Music/Songs of Cash/Bughouse.)
From "A Man In Black", © 1971, Columbia Records

How dare you attack someone who had so much artistic courage? You are a shit stain on the undewear of DU.

That might get deleted, demnan, but *I* liked it.

It was an absurdist non-sequitur. As if I was seriously presenting an expose of insider knowledge of the state of Johnny Cash's underwear?

Freeperesque? Fuck off. I find this sacred-cow worship more Freeperesque. I love Johnny Cash's music. He was a genius. Yes, he died, and that's sad. We all die. If Mel Brooks can ridicule the holocaust, I guess it should be okay for me to make a dumb joke about Johnny Cash's ass.

aren't clever or iconoclastic.

But thanks for sharing, mmmmkay?

Johnny Cash was not "degraded" by my joke. His reputation could hardly be touched by an anonymous messageboard post. So chill your shrill, Mr. Bill.

I think the events of the last couple of weeks have proven that God is, indeed, dead.