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Here I am, While I have Two kids. I will NOT have another. They do mean things to me, Like almost kill me. My son, was two pounds lighter than the above mentioned baby Girl. He weighed in at 7lb 4 Oz. but his big Irish head got stuck. My labor was fast, but they didn't realize that I paradoxically react to Stadol. (instead of this making me settle down it made me 100% meaner than I normally am. add to this the pain of labor... NOT FUN!) I threw My Ex-Husband out like every five minutes or so, and my Mother was on every other five minute intervals. I kicked the Midwife, who thought she could deliver this kid.
My hip Dislocated and rotated inward, so the birth canal became more cramped and I couldn't fix my hip to make it stop hurting. (My hips both pop out I can relocate them, It hurts intensely for about 15 minutes, but I have gotten pretty used to it.) I then Look at the Kid's monitor thing that they screw into their scalps.... His heart rate had decelerated to the point that they were going to lose us both. He was too far down in the birth canal to Cut out. I felt odd, too, and noticed that my pressure was reading REALLY low (78/36) and my heart rate although it felt like it was up to 300, was down to 14. I swear, I knew I was going to die.
Now, Here I am, Excruciating Pain, Dislocated hip, baby not doing well. I hear one thing in my head "Princess, ROLL" Huh? It was clearly my Dad's Voice, who had been dead for then 16 years. I managed to get up on my hands and knees while they were having a conference about what to do in the corner. I did it by Myself, hip out and all. Well this solved the Hip issue as it gave me enough of a surface to push on to get it back in. They looked up from the Huddle and saw me rocking on my hands and knees, and the heart monitor they had screwed into my Son's head stopped alarming, His heart rate rose to a safe level. I Finally rolled back to my back, Again, by myself cause the dumb asses were trying to discuss what I did. I looked at the Midwife and said "Would you like to do something please?" She had enough balls to grab my shoulders and tell me to calm down. Since she was standing between my legs I kicked her again. Where did she get her certification? A Cracker Jack Box? I was only an EMT and a CNA at the time but, I knew she was like out of her mind.
She broke sterility to grab my shoulders and everything. Well, by this time, I was done. I started to Push.... Moe, Larry and Curly, the Nurses were like can she start pushing yet? The Midwife who remember I had just kicked and who also grabbed me and broke sterility decided that I needed her UNSTERILE ARM in me to her elbow. She told Moe, Larry and Curly to get the Stirrups. They complied and Put the things on BACKWARDS. I am short, I couldn't do a thing with them. I then broke a wooden bed rail in pain, anger and total frustration. They fixed the stirrups, and I began to push more. I ended up with a Stage Four tear. That is the WHOLE WAY through. I had over 300 stitches to correct the damage. My son looked like someone had beaten him nearly to death, They had to use a vacuum extractor and Forceps to yank him out. They almost punched through his temple, He had two black eyes and his nose was all swollen. His head not only was misshapen from the birth, But he had huge bruises from the Vacuum and the forceps. These lasted for a few weeks in total.
Then I went in for my checkup and they told me I had a massive infection. Well DUH, She broke sterility to grab my shoulders. I needed IV antibiotics, My temp was 104, and I nearly had to have a Hysterectomy due to the infection being so bad. I was Obsessive-Compulsive about bathing, and cleaning the external area, so I know what it came from and I told the MD what had happened. The Midwife doesn't work in that hospital or that practice anymore. They hooked me to an IV, and I stayed in his office for about 4 hours, he covered my IV port, and told me I had to get my Then husband to come get me, I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to go back in in 48 hours for another round of Antibiotics and was on oral ones as well. I did this for a Month. What an Ordeal, But they healthy 9 Year old was worth it.
Now for my Girl, I was a known High Risk Pregnancy, Health Problems and An over 27 pound weight loss plagued me. The Doctor I had was AWESOME, Nothing rattled this guy, He had delivered like over a 1000 babies in his career, he looked rather like a Thinner Version of Santa. He is wonderful. He watched me like a hawk, He had me in there twice a week from the second trimester to the third, and from the seventh month on I was in his office 4 out of 5 days. I had sleep disturbances by the 7th month, I was sleeping 2 (yes 2) hours a week. He found something I could safely take to sleep, cause this was causing even more problems. He took my girl when I was 38 weeks, He didn't want to wait longer as my Blood Pressure had started to Rise. He scheduled me for Friday July 26. He decided that I would have her the normal way, or at least try to. He would then do a c-Section at the first hint of a problem. He laughed at me when I asked for an Epidural cause I did it when I was 8 months pregnant.
Well I went in to the hospital, all ready in early labor. They started my Pitocyn Drip, got my Epidural started as soon as they could and I had a Healthy, Beautiful baby Girl. She was screaming on her way out. I needed no stitches, which this doc is Renowned for. He took her pic for his wall, and was wonderful to everyone. The RN I had kicked ass, She was PERFECT! I was a Nurse by now, so they all Took really good care of me. Well, Later that night, My husband had taken his mother home, and a RN came in at my Ringing. I had started to hemorrhage. I ended up losing 3200 cc's of Blood. I almost died. They had me jacked up on Morphine, I had an IV running Wide Open, (Lactated Ringers replace volume.) and I needed a blood Transfusion.
They got the bleeding under control, and my Doctor came in and told me that I should think about not doing this childbirth thing again. He knew the previous history, and in light of the events of the Previous night, he thought that tying my tubes was the best thing to do, I agreed and he snuck me into the OR with a Low blood count to do the surgery.
I hurt like hell for all of a day, I developed No infections, and other than a HUGE scare with my girl's Heart, everything is fine. Her heart had a hole in it, which was caused by an Incomplete Closing of the Foramen Ovale (This is normal in babies, but it usually closes without issue, It serves to facilitate something with the heart and Lungs, I would have to grab my Text book and look.) She had a severe heart murmur, and was going to need surgery. Well I kept my eye on her, I listened to that murmur all the time and I kept noting that it seemed to be getting less pronounced. The Md's and Peds Cardio Doc all listened to her and agreed, her heart was getting better. Today, 28 months later, she has NO murmur.
Would I have another kid? Are you INSANE?
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