Worst song from the 80s ?

I think it was a worst decade than the 70s for crappy music.

Everything Cindy Lauper gives me a headache.

Will always love youuuuuuuuuuuuu...:evilgrin:

But her 80s songs (and hair) were pretty bad...

The whole year of 1987 from Jan 2, actually to March of '88 I worked in a shop where there was a guy who LOVED that screech and always cranked it way up. Radio, 3 or 4 times a day. I've heard the same song recently by somebody else and it sounded so much better I almost didn't recognize it.

Before her there was Linda Ronstadt and before her even was Barbra Streisand. And, of course, Ethel Merman. Fingernails on a blackboard, all of them.

Whitney Houston's version of "I Will Always Love You" was released in 1992. It debuted on Billboards charts in November of '92 and went on to #1.

The song was written by and originally recorded by Dolly Parton, who had a #1 hit with it on the country charts in 1974.

but she still kicked ass :kick: NOBODY did the star spangle banner as good as Miss Whitney did. NOBODY

she oversings. That's a cardinal offence.

That song makes me cringe. Damn Drew Barrymore for resurrecting that stupid, ugly decade.
:mad:

ick!

And it was Bush I's campaign theme.

:puke:

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on edit: hated it 20 years ago, still hate it today! $tar$hip $ell out!

Well placed pukes.

Best song: Melt With You.

about the money they got?

Two-faced.

...from Jefferson Starship. They seem to still play that and a lot of Huey Lewis here, I guess because they're Bay Area locals.

So what if it wasn't what we expected from Grace Slick.

I agree 100%. Worst song ever. :puke:

The real villain is Starships's "Sara." That guy just sings way too high, and it gits up mah nose.

Although I could be wrong...:shrug:

Sara, Sara, no time is the right time for goodbyes.


BTW no Grace did not sing it.

IIRC it was an online viewer poll for the worst song of the 80s (or the video era-- whatever, same damn thing almost) and it was head and shoulders the worst.

So, you're DEFINATELY not alone (love the pukers) !

What's really pathetic is how Starship sort of co-opted the San Francisco music scene with this shite tune, when we all know the SF scene has always been incredibly vibrant and hugely influential.

Sorry folks. I feel just horrible I had to plant that one in your head. Try a power drill to the scull to remove.

:spank:

I like this song.

by Billy Ray Cyrus, King of the Mullets.

I replaced heart with balls. :)

LOL

nt

by Whitney Houston. That song makes me bonkers.

Show them all the beauty they possess inside!

For the record, I also posted this song in a thread last night of the Best song of the 80's. I was about 9 when it came out and I LOOOVED it. In retrospect, well, it's not my fault I was raised in the 80's. Unless it was karma from a previous life. I wonder about that sometimes. ;)

some of the less huge acts had good songs.

"Heart Beat" by Don Johnson

There are soooo many more...

That song that Dirk Diggler does in "Boogie Nights" is a good representation of all the horrible "Hard-driving" pop-rock songs that were in vogue.

I had forgotten that one.:puke::hurts: :puke:

Dirk rules!

:evilfrown:

So you think you're bad, with your rap
Well I'll tell ya pilgrim I started the crap
When you were in diapers and wetting the sheets
I was at the Ponderosa rapping to the beat

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

Sure I rustled some cattle and tended the sheep
But my main concern was rapping to the beat
I don't bother nobody I'm a real nice guy, kinda
laid back like a, dead fly

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

I'm talkin, here and now
Later for the cattle and rustlin the cow
If I had a chance to do a repeat
You can bet your sweet dippy I'd be rappin to the beat

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

Que pasa amigos? Not a *pasa* I see
Two hundred punks well what ya gonna do?
I got two six shooters that'll see me through
That's, twelve dead...
and a hundred and eighty-eight pallbearers

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

What I do on your grave won't pass for flowers either

Now Kurtis Blow, Run-D.M.C.
You haven't heard of rap, til ya heard it from me
I'm the baddest rapper in history
And there'll be no more, after me

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

Meanwhile, back at the ranch
Santa Barbera that is
Swimmin pools, and movie stars
Well the first thing ya know ol' Ron's the President
The kinfolk said, "Ron move away from there"
Said, "In The White House is where you wanna be"
So he loaded up the Lincoln and he moved to D.C.

Washington, that is
Politicians taking a sip
Foreign dignitaries taking a trip
High tax and plenty Cadillacs

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

Now ya see me in my movies, doin my thing
But deep in my heart, I've wanted to sing
"Wayyyy dowwwn, upon the swannnny riverrrrrr
Farrrr, farrr awayyy
Titwillow, titwillow, titwillow"
I don't think, that's your style
But I'll tell ya pilgrim, I'm versatile
Aretha Franklin, Aretha Franklin
Aretha Franklin let me rock ya let me rock ya Aretha Franklin
Let me rock ya Aretha Franklin that's all I wanna do
Aretha Franklinnnnnn

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

I'm feeelin the groove now pilgrim
Party, over here
Party, over there
There's nothin to it, the way we do it
Woop woop!
East coast, West coast
Texas

Every time I put on pants
I tell ya pilgrim I wanna dance
I put a quarter, in the juke'
Then I commence, to doin the Duke

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

It's pretty easy, if you can see
Just move your arms kinda freely
Do a pause, and take a step
And just make sure the beat is kept

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

I was at the Ponderosa rappin to the beat
Tryin to cool off from the desert heat
I discovered somethin, really neat
The Duke has moves, with his feet

Da haahh... da haahh
Da haahh... da haahh

I won plenty of ladies, with my charms
But they like me the most for the moves of my arms

Woahhh... woahhh

I'm gonna rap, in the East
Gonna rap, in the West
I'll show ya pilgrim, who's the best
Nothin to it, the way we do it
Skiddely-be-bop, we-bop, Scooby Doo
Guess what America we love you

Da hahhhh, da hahhhh, da hahhhh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh

Everybody

Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh
Da haahh, da haahh
Da ha-hahh ha-hahh haahh...

....THE WORST SONG EVER RECORDED! *projectile* :puke:

The 80's was the worst music decade. Although there was some underground stuff developing at the time which proved worthy... but from a 'popular' perspective, it was as phony as Reagan.

Falco or After the fire? }(

You pick :evilgrin:

At least Falco wrote the damn thing, they covered a horrible song, and took the trouble to translate it!

Falco (R.I.P.) is the only one that did RMA. And yes, ATF definately fscked that one up.

I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate that fucking song with every fiber of my being!!! :argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh:

and too many others.

I still can't stand that song.

A song that should have earned the band Europe 5 years hard labor in a Soviet Gulag.

lame and one of the worst videos to go with it.

I absolutely loooooooooooathe that song. I can't stand anything Europe did. For some reason, my husband really likes "The Final Countdown."

*gag*

Taco....uggggggg.

My two least favorites have now been mentioned. :)

I didn't even have to think about it.

Mr. Roboto by styx.

Tongue-tied, (I'm) short of breath, don't even try
Try a little harder
Something's wrong, you're not naive, you must be strong
Ooh, baby, try
Hey girl, move a little closer.
You're

CHORUS:
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush, eye to eye
Too shy shy
Hush hush

Modern medicine falls short of your complaints
Ooh, try a little harder
You're moving in circles, won't you dilate
Baby try
Hey girl, move a little closer
'Cause, you're

(Chorus)

Too happy for me.

But probably Affair of the Heart is the WORST. I had a friend who was hot for him, and we had to listen to the tape (yes, tape) over and over and....

I hate that band. Hate hate hate hate.

:puke:

I heard Dennis DeYoung play it on the accordian once. I swear. Vast improvement, heh heh.

is My Sharona. That one made me almost want to puke on the jukebox everytime some moron played it.


Ooops....it was 1979, but I remember it played a lot in early 80s.

Rick James...What the fuck were you thinking...Bitch?

:puke:

:puke:
POS! Not even a song, a friggin' cheer with that idiot in her stoop outfit. Again, I :puke:

...my nominations include:

"I Can't Wait" - Nu Shooz
Rick Astley's 2 hits from the late 80s that sounded exactly alike
"Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison - this wretched turd-biscuit absolutely deserves to be in the Top Ten!!! :puke:

I just heard that on our retro lunch '80s show on a local radio station. I hadn't heard that since about 1983 or so.

It hadn't been long enough. :cry:

Why did you have to mention friggin' Aldo Nova? :puke:

And that fucking song has been in my head all day. Remember his video in his leopard spandex pants? :D

*shudder*

Long story short.

I was a serious metal-head...

I used to work in a record store...

4-5 days a week...

4-6 hrs a day...

We had an in store "playlist" of about a dozen songs paid for by the record labels that we were required to adhere to.

"Tomorrow" was on the playlist for THREE FUCKING MONTHS! (you do the math).

:puke:

Olivia Newton John

gag_me_with_a_spoon

:scared:

I used to be bartender in Ft. Lauderdale, and the pool bar used to play this piece of shit every other song... I hated it... to this day it makes me wanna throw something through a window...

:argh:

Lucky Star was the same thing as dragging fingernails across a chalkboard.

Mama He's Crazy and Grandpa by the Judds :puke:

:wow:

We're the Bears Shufflin' Crew.
Shufflin' on down, doin' it for you.
We're so bad we know we're good.
Blowin' your mind like we knew we would.
You know we're just struttin' for fun
Struttin' our stuff for everyone.
We're not here to start no trouble.
We're just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle.

Well, they call me Sweetness,
and I like to dance.
Runnin' the ball is like makin' romance
We've had the goal since training camp
To give Chicago a Super Bowl Champ.
And we're not doing this because we're greedy.
The Bears are doin' it to feed the needy.
We didn't come here to look for trouble,
We just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.

This is Speedy Willie, and I'm world class.
I like runnin', but I love to get the pass.
I practice all day and dance all night,
I got to get ready for the Sunday fight.
Now I'm smooth as a chocolate swirl,
I dance a little funky, so watch me girl.
There's no one here that does it like me,
My Superbowl Shuffle will set you free.

I'm Samurai Mike. I stop 'em cold.
Part of the defense, big and bold.
I've been jammin' for quite a while,
Doin' what's right and settin' the style.
Give me a chance , I'll rock you good,
Nobody messin' in my neighborhood.
I didn't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just came to do the Superbowl Shuffle.

(CHORUS)
I'm the punky QB, known as McMahon.
When I hit the turf, I've got no plan.
I just throw my body all over the field.
I can't dance, but, I can throw the pill.
I motivate the cats, I like to tease.
I play so cool, I aim to please.
That's why you all got here on the double,
To catch me doin' the Superbowl Shuffle.

I'm mama's boy Otis, one of a kind.
The ladies all love me
For my body and my mind.
I'm slick on the floor as I can be.
But ain't no sucker gonna get past me.
Some guys are jealous
Of my style and class.
That's why some end up on their (bleep).
I didn't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just get down to the Superbowl Shuffle.

They say Jimbo is our man.
If he can't do it, I sure can.
This is Steve, and it's no wonder.
I run like lightnin', pass like thunder.
So bring on Atlanta, bring on Dallas.
This is for Mike and Papa Bear Halas.
I'm not here to feather this ruffle,
I just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.

I'm L.A. Mike and I play it cool.
They don't sneak by me 'cause I'm no fool.
I fly on the field and get on down.
Everybody knows I don't mess around.
I can break 'em, shake 'em,
Any time of day.
I like to steal it and make 'em pay.
So please don't try to beat my hustle,
'Cause I'm just here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle.

(CHORUS)
The sackman's comin', I'm your man Dent.
If the quarterback's slow,
He's gonna get bent.
We stop the run, we stop the pass.
I like to dump guys on their (bleep).
We love to play for the world's best fans.
You better start makin'
Your Superbowl plans.
But don't get ready or go to any trouble,
Unless you practice
The Superbowl Shuffle.

It's Gary here, I'm Mr. Clean.
They call me "hit man"
Don't know what they mean.
They throw it long and watch me run.
I'm on my man, one on one.
Buddy's guys cover it down to the bone.
That's why they call us the 46 zone.
Come on everybody, let's scream and yell.
We're goin' to do the Shuffle,
Then ring your bell.

You're lookin' at the Fridge,
I'm the rookie.
I may be large, but I'm no dumb cookie.
You've seen me hit, you've seen me run.
When I kick and pass, we'll have more fun.
I can dance, you will see.
The others, they all learn from me.
I don't come here lookin' for trouble,
I just came here to do
The Superbowl Shuffle!

Ever.

PHIL COLLINS solo is even worse.

UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Kill me.

I don't care what you say
you can give it away

Your money don't mean much to me.
I've been out on my own
gonna got it alone now

'Cause that's the way it's got to be.
Ev'rybody tells me how I can beat the odds for now.
Well
I've been standing by the fire
but I iust can't feel the heat.

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat
beating like mine.

Looking at me
it's easy to see

You think you know iust how I feel.
If you do to me wrong and it won't take me long

Before my restless heart will heal.
I'm looking for a love
love like mine

They tell me it's so hard to find

But I can feel it in the rhythm of the heartbeat in the street.

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Beating like mine
beating like mine.
Tell me what you feel now without the heartbeat

Tell me is it real now without the heartbeat?

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.
Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat.

Huey Lewis and News with "Stuck With You."

Anything by Tiffany.

Anything by Debbie Gibson.

Anything by Milli Vanilli.

Michael Sembello's "Maniac."

So many more bad songs to add....

Say - is there a GOOD songs of the 80s thread somewhere?

Fuckin' Foreigner... :puke:

Let's see what have people missed that's been bad from this decade, how about

"To All The Girls I've Loved Before"--Julio Igleasias and Willie Nelson

"Key Largo"--Bertie Higgins

"Islands in the Stream"--Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton

"Freedom"--Wham!

"I Can't Wait"--Nu Shooz

"I Saw Him Standing There"--Tiffany (bastardizing the Beatles)

"Shake Your Love"--Debbie Giddy

"Together Forever"--Rick Astley

"Party All The Time--Eddie Murphy (Yes, I know it was listed already, but had to be mentioned again)

"Heart Attack"--Olivia Newton John (as if "Physical" was bad enough)

"HeartLight"--Neil Diamond (E.T. deserved better)

"Sunglasses At Night--Corey Hart (stealing the riff of Eurythmics' "Sweet Dreams" for this silly typical 80's song)

"Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car"--Billy Ocean

"Madonna Don't Preach"

"Naughty Girls (Need Love To)--Samantha Fox

and more would come to me, if they dawned on me. As for new wave, my favorite genre, yes, Taco did go too far when it came to the cheese.

Everybody rips everybody else in music anyway, so the point is?

Some things you cannot even call music get air play :shrug:

It was absolutely PERFECT as used in F911 -- as the background music for the Shrub's "Mission Accomplished" stunt. That's one of my all time favorite "soundtracking" moments.

I still love that song. I thought it was a wonderful tribute to E.T.

:shrug:

Anything by Culture Club, a Flock of Seagulls, Lionel Ritchie

Most of Prince's early stuff sucked ass, too... Purple Rain, that is.

Let's not forget The Cure...that shit got old quick.

The Smiths would have been much better WITHOUT Morrisey.

PIL...gimme a break. Johnny Rotten's attempt to "...give punk a new edge" failed miserably (although his PIL songs Seattle and Fair Weather Friend were pretty cool).

Cyndi Lauper makes me ill, too.

Obsession
by Animotion

You are an obsession
I cannot sleep
I am a possession
Unopened at your feet
There is no balance
No equality
Be still
I will not accept defeat

I will have you
Yes I will have you
I will find a way and I will have you
Like a butterfly
A wild butterfly
I will collect you and capture you

You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me
You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me

I feed you I drink you
My day and my night
I need you I need you
By sun or candlelight
You protest you want to leave
Stay there's no alternative

Your face appears again
I see the beauty there
But I see danger
Stranger beware
A circumstance in your naked dream
Your affection is not what it seems

You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me
You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me

My fantasy has turned to madness
All my goodness has turned to badness
My need to posess you has consumed my soul
My life is trembling I have no control

I will have you
Yes I will have you
I will find a way and I will have you
Like a butterfly
A wild butterfly
I will collect you and capture you

You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me
You are an obsession
You're my obsession
Who do you want me to be
To make you sleep with me

'Nuff said.

For me it would have to be Phil Collins "Sussudio" or whatever the hell.

"We Built This City" deserves an honorable mention for sure!!

"The Final Countdown" deserves a DIShonorable mention! Gack!!

Jitterbug Jitterbug Jitterbug

You put the boom-boom into my heart
You send my soul sky high when your lovin' starts
Jitterbug into my brain
It goes a bang-bang-bang 'til my feet do the same
But something's buggin' me
Something ain't right
My best friend told me what you did last night
You left me sleepin' in my bed
I was dreamin', but should have been with you instead.

Wake me up before you go-go
Don't leave me hangin' on like a yo-yo
Wake me up before you go-go
I don't wanna miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go-go
'Cause I'm not planning on going solo
Wake me up before you go-go
Take me dancing tonight...
I wanna hit that high... yeah... yeah

You took the grey skies out of my way
You made the sun shine brighter than Doris Day
You turned a bright spark into a flame
My beats per minute never been the same
'Cause you're my lady, I'm your fool
It makes me crazy when you act so cruel
Come on, baby, let's not fight
We'll go dancing, everything will be all right

(Repeat Chorus)
(Jitterbug) (Jitterbug)

Come on baby, move in tight
We'll go dancing tomorrow night
It's could out there, but it´s warm in bed
They can dance
We'll stay at home instead

(Jitterbug)
(Repeat Chorus):puke:

U2 and R.E.M. among others did some of their finest work during the 80's. If i wasn't going to bed i'd give you a whole list of good 80's music.

10000 maniacs
Stevie Ray Vaughan
Eurythmics
Bonnie Raitt - Nick Of Time
Dire Straits - Love Over Gold
Dire Straits Brothers in Arms
George Michael - Faith
inxs
Janet Jackson - Control
Janet Jackson - Rhythm Nation 1814
Melissa Etheridge
Miami Sound Machine
Prince
Tom Petty

whereas I go with the Chicken Song (can't remember the artist), although that one at least mercifully had no lyrics.