DU Jews: Is this offensive to you?

Just wondering. It's the Hanukkah story as a blues tune, with a few miscellaneous verses at the end.

There was a king named Antiochus
He wasn’t a very nice guy
If you didn’t believe what he believed
Then you had to die!
Well, the Jews were under orders
To not express opposing views
Is it any wonder
They had the Hanukkah blues?

The temple of Jerusalem
Came under attack
Some rebels called the Maccabees
Fought to win their temple back
Those people were persecuted
Man, they really paid their dues
Is it any wonder
They had the Hanukkah blues?

The odds were stacked against them,
they fought with all their might
Though they were few in numbers
Them brothers, they were tight
That battle was no picnic
It was no pleasure cruise
I tell ya, these folks were sick and tired
Of having the Hanukkah blues.

The Maccabees finally triumphed
Against incredible odds
Antiochus could no longer force them
To worship all his gods
But still their job wasn’t finished
They had no time to snooze
There was still a lot of work to do if
They wanted to get rid of the Hanukkah blues.

They needed some light so they could see
To set the temple straight
They only had oil for one day
But it lasted them for eight!
They had to share this miracle
Had to share the good news
That miracle of light in the temple
Drove away the Hanukkah blues.

I have a little dreidel
I made it out of clay
And when it’s dry and ready
With dreidel I will play
Oh dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I made it out of clay
And when it’s dry and ready
With dreidel I will play


We’ll eat a ton of latkes
Translated, potato pancakes
We’ll eat so much we’ll throw up
And get a tummyache
I shouldn’t eat all that fried food anyway
It makes my thighs the size of canoes
Next year, I’ll just stick to matzoh
To avoid the Hanukkah blues.

There's eight days full of presents
from Game Boys down to socks
If Charlie Brown were Jewish
he'd say "I got a rock!"
Well, St. Nick won't be coming around
Leaving candy in our shoes
But as long as we don't get underwear
We won't have the Hanukkah blues.

Not bad for historical accuracy as well!

What I personally find offensive are the old right-winged stereotypes of us being money grubbing Shylocks now being joined by new leftie stereotypes that we're all Nazi oppressors of Palestinians.

Those of us progressives are now caught between a rock and a hard place.

But that's serious talk, and this is one of our few happy holidays. (which is why it's considered a "minor" one.)

Anyway, Mazel Tov and Merry Winter no matter what the celebration!

in fact, its kinda cute. :P

Happy Hanukkah everyone!

of Hanukkah at the same time.

Is is to be played to a bluesy type tune as the words would seem to indicate?

To to call people "Jews" is offensive, and that the proper term is "Jewish people." Is this true?

In fact, I'm kind of disappointed.

the Dr. Suess Bible --

One day God said
This is what I will do
I'll send down my son
I'll send him to you
To clear up this humpity
Bumpity hulabaloo

His name will be Christ
And he'll never wear shoes
And his pals will all call
Him the King of the Jews

He didn't come in a plane
He didn't come in a jeep
He didn't come in the pouch
Of a high jumping vo veep

He rode on the back of a black sasatoo
Which is the blackiest creature
You ever could view

He rode to Jerusalem
Home of the grumpity Jews
Where false prophets are worshipped
Some even in two's

There was Murrary Von Mer
And Genghis Vo Vooze
The one you could worship
By taking a snooze

Christ spoke from a mound
Which is a pile of ground
And people gathered around
Without making a sound
And thus he spake

Sin in socks
Socks full of sin
How do we quiet this
Jehoviadin din

Do unto others as
They do unto you
That includes you
Young Timothy Foo

One pharisee said to another he knew
"What do we do with this upitty Jew?"
We can wash him in wine
And make him all clean
And into Sam Zittle's
Crucifixion Machine

Twirl the gawhril
And relase the gavlease
And in go the nails
As fast as you please

And it is said that he
Said as he bled:

Forgive them Father
For they know not what they do

For they walk through this life
In toe crampity shoes.

Do you?

Amen.

(Kids in the Hall, of course)