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Okay, I feel horrible.

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jackelope72 Donating Member (726 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 02:59 PM
Original message
Okay, I feel horrible.
Last night I was at a grocery store, and I noticed that the older lady in front of me in line, while putting her items on the conveyor belt, had accidentally dropped a can of food out of her hands, and it had rolled underneath her coat. I was going to point it out to her, but all I managed to get out was "Excuse me, ma'am..." before she shot me a nasty look and snapped, "What do you want!" It had been a long day for me, and getting snapped at like that really pissed me off, so I just shrugged and said, "Never mind, you old bat."

So, anyway, she paid for her purchases (minus the item underneath her coat), put her bags into her cart, and left. I paid for my items and as I was heading out, I saw her standing by the door while the store security tore through her bags. One of the security guards found the forgotten item and started yelling at her, accusing her of shoplifting and saying they were going to call the police. I was still in pissed off mode, so I left without a word. The lady was crying, and at the time I felt a certain satisfaction.

But I couldn't get to sleep at all last night. All I could think about was the lady, who might very well be in jail, and is most certainly in trouble, and all over an item accidentally dropped in her haste. Did she deserve all this trouble just because her bad mood ignited my bad mood? I'm usually not that mean-spirited, and now my stomach is tied up in knots over the whole thing.

I don't really expect any solutions or anything. I just had to get it out. I've been trying to squash my guilt all day, and it's not working.
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LisaM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:01 PM
Response to Original message
1. Call the store and tell them what you saw
and explain why you didn't act at the time. If they really did press charges, that should clear it up.
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Connie_Corleone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:02 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Better still, go in person. nt
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Kire Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:11 PM
Response to Reply #1
9. are you absolutely sure it was accidental?
sounds like you are, so go to the store
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huskerlaw Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:02 PM
Response to Original message
3. Don't feel bad
you tried to warn her. I think nearly everyone would have reacted the same way. That said, I agree with the above advice, if you feel that bad about it, call the store.
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:02 PM
Response to Original message
4. It may not have been an accident.
She truly may have been shoplifting, and that may explain her hostility when you tried to get her attention.
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KurtNYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:18 PM
Response to Reply #4
11. That was my thought
There are many ways shoplifters work. Extra pockets, pockets in their sleeves (you drop an item into your sleeve while your arm is raised then it becomes trapped in the pocket when your arm is lowered), etc.

One is what looks like a shopping bag that has a box in it. The bottom of the (empty) box and bag is cut in such a way that you can put the whole thing over something on the ground and it will pick it up and conceal it, looking like a purchase from the another store.

But all the same, if you are troubled, I would go back to the store and see what you can do to help sort out the truth.
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fob Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:03 PM
Response to Original message
5. Taking the account above it seems she made her own bed, you tried
to warn her NOT to lay down in it.

Go to the back yard with a football and throw 9 Hail Mary's. You are absolved.
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johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:03 PM
Response to Original message
6. I doubt she is doing hard time for a can of food
I can understand why you are feeling bad, but people (young and old) should learn to not be so uptight. I guess I would have walked up to her and told her "That's what I was going to tell you".
At least you tried.
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LudwigVan Donating Member (103 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:05 PM
Response to Original message
7. That was not your fault.
But I've had items somehow appear in my bags I didn't pay for without my intent. Things like packets of gravy or ramen noodles. That guard was overzealous. Did they see her actually sneak in items?

I doubt they actually put her in jail, but you never know nowadays.
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Done Donating Member (680 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:08 PM
Response to Original message
8. Sometimes senior citizens are in a bad mood often because
of arthritis or something. I know I'm unpleasant when I have a toothache. Still, your response was normal.
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jackelope72 Donating Member (726 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:15 PM
Response to Original message
10. I followed the good advice here
and called up the store. Talked to the manager on duty. He took down the information and said he'd tell it to the store manager, but he doubted that they had done anything but give the woman a tongue-lashing. He also said stuff like that happened a lot; he seemed to be amused that I had even thought much about it.
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LisaM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:26 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. And now you feel better, right? n/t

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jackelope72 Donating Member (726 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 04:46 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. Much, much better.
Thank you for the nudge in the right direction. :)
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 03:29 PM
Response to Original message
13. *hugs* Clearly the fact that your
conscience was troubling you and that you called up the store shows that you are a very compassionate person.

*More hugs*

------------------------------------
Would Jesus love a liberal? You bet!
http://timeforachange.bluelemur.com/
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jackelope72 Donating Member (726 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 04:50 PM
Response to Reply #13
15. *hugs* Thanks.
I try, even though my short temper does get the best of me sometimes.
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Jack_Dawson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 04:51 PM
Response to Original message
16. How come I would NEVER find a post like this in Freeperland?
:shrug:
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slutticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 04:56 PM
Response to Original message
17. Fuck it. It's called Karma.
The law of Cause and Effect.

Not your fault. Through her actions she created her predicament.

Don't worry about it.
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txaslftist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-13-05 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
18. You done the right thing in calling them up...
Doncha feel better?
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