Stupidest thing done while drunk

Probably for me, its coming onto this message board when I am smashed and am in no condition to post.

1997 or thereabouts. I was visiting my cousin J. in Athens, GA for the weekend. We went out with another acquaintance, S., and headed for the bars on Broad Street.

Before we got there, we took the acid we'd gotten for the evening...2 hits apiece for them, and 3 for me, since we had one extra and I volunteered to pay the difference. Get to the bar, settle in, do some drinking in a back room with Day-Glo painted walls and a blacklite and wait for the acid to come on. After about an hour or so, we're pretty well up....the people in the main barroom are leaving 30-foot trails.

Along about then, J. and S. decide they want to go out to the country. Someplace called "the Shoals". S. claimed to know where it was, so J. drove where he was told, until S. says "Yo, man...I think that's it up there."

J. slows down, puts on his signal, and when the road sign is readable, S. says "No, that's not it...okay, we'll try the next one."

Well, it wasn't the next one, either. Or the next.

"It's gotta be this next one", says S.

It's not. And as J. is speeding back up, there's a flash of blue light from behind. A cop. Who apparently found all of our slowing, not turning, etc., suspicious.

I'm carrying some Klonopin and Vicodin I don't have a prescription for in one pocket...one quick gulp takes care of it.

J. is VERY nervous. He doesn't have his driver's license. He was, in fact, arrested less than a year earlier for driving under the influence, and is driving on the ticket issued him in lieu of his license while awaiting trial.

The officer senses something off...maybe scents the liquor on J.'s breath...and gets ALL of us to step out of the vehicle.

J. is Breathalysed while S. and I watch. His BAC? 0.14%. 0.06% above the cutoff. Meanwhile, I'm standing there, trying to keep from losing my mind, as there are seriously disturbing things going on in the rotating blue lights atop the cruiser AND I have to concentrate on looking nonchalant.

The cop is, apparently, not a hardass. He knows another DUI arrest will probably send J. off to jail for a while, and he IS a college student. The cop weighs this in his mind, and apparently reaches a decision.

"Can either of you drive this car back to Athens?" he asks.

Foolishly, I step forward and say "I can!"

So I get to blow into the little plastic tube. And my BAC is either 0.12 or 0.13%. Plus I'm on more acid than either of them, which the cop DOESN'T know...along with the stuff I swallowed.

The cop confers with his partner; we wait. Finally, he walks over, hands me the keys, and says "I want you to drive this vehicle STRAIGHT back to Athens. Do NOT go ANYWHERE else."

"Yes, officer", I say, and we get in the car. I have no memory of the drive back...40 or 50 miles, drunk, with a head full of LSD, Vicodin, and Klonopin...I'm lucky I got us back in one piece.

And THAT is the stupidest thing I've ever done while drunk. Ah, youth.

It was fun for a few hours while.. then I spent the rest of the night puking my guts out. Felt horrifically sick the day too. x(

that's probably why you puked.

And mixing it with alcohol isn't such a great idea, anyway...opiates + booze CAN = respiratory paralysis, not to mention what the acetaminophen does to your liver...

My forearm pressed against his forearm, lit cigarette dropped in the cleft where our skin touched, first one to pull away loses. Neither pulled away, so the cigarette burned down to the butt while lying against our arms. I still have the scar to prove the dumbness.

Then again, we did it while sitting in a room with a bunch of ROTC guys who were drunk and talking about how cool combat and killing would be...so there is dumb, and there is dumb. At least we scared the shit out of them.

Driving.

I'm not talking a little tipsy, I'm talking about waking up with your car sitting outside your house and not being able to remember the trip home.

That is of course the time I stopped drinking...

Actually that was probably one of my more lucid moments

Heh.

I drove into the exit of a Drive in Movie theater that was showing X-Rated movies and it had those spikes that would tear your tires up if you were doing anything but exiting the joint.

It flattened all four of my tires, ripped my oil pan off and punctured my gas tank that had hardly any gas in it.

God I was wasted, coming back from a wedding.

What was I thinking?

Shots, lines of coke, and monster joints will do this kinda shit to you.

"Oh my god you guys! I can't see!"

Never got drunk again.

It was at the fraternity where I was attending a rush party. Did many other embarrassing things that night as well and, needless to say, they did not invite me to join.

Mardi Gras. Tailgating party on the blvd. in which my group of family and friends rented a port-a-potty just for our group's use. There were only about twenty people there--I went in, forgot to lift the lid, and then came out...and realized what I had done.

:scared:

I was going into the NYC subway with my ex-wife and a classmate for dinner after a reunion of hers at Fordham. I went down the wrong staircase and saw them standing across on the other platform. I heard a train coming. So what did I do but jump down onto the subway tracks, leap across the third rails, and scramble up before the train got there. They were both horrified. But I'm still alive.

Well, I jumped into a hot tub with an expensive italian suit on, shaved my head...gave my friend's short brother an airplane spin.... managed to make everyone thing I drank from the plunger.


Oh yeah...that was all in one night.