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What's the worst thing I can do to my supervisor and not be arrested?

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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:31 PM
Original message
What's the worst thing I can do to my supervisor and not be arrested?
Looking for creative suggestions... :bounce:
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SmileyBoy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:31 PM
Response to Original message
1. Take a dump in his coat pocket.
j/k
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Seabiscuit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 02:29 AM
Response to Reply #1
37. Pee in his coffee pot.
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xmas74 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:32 PM
Response to Original message
2. Give him some "special" brownies for his birthday.
I did it and they couldn't prove anything!
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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:32 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. laxatives or sedatives?
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SmileyBoy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:34 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. It's a laxative AND a sedative.
That good-ol' reliable weed.
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xmas74 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:37 PM
Response to Reply #3
11. Exlax and pot.
Plus, some people use mashed, stewed prunes to replace the oil content. I added that, too. I followed a mix, replaced the oil with the prunes, mixed the water with Metamucil, melted the ExLax with a square of chocolate and finely ground down my pot. I baked it up and gave it to him on his birthday. It was fun.
I told him it was a secret family recipe. He devoured it.
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mark414 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 02:33 AM
Response to Reply #11
38. what a waste of good pot
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xmas74 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:40 PM
Response to Reply #3
13. Oh, I forgot to mention
My former boss-was the police chief of the town that I lived in.
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BrklynLiberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:59 PM
Response to Reply #3
20. in his coffee.....
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pstans Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:34 PM
Response to Original message
4. Give him a Wet Willey
and then run.
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paranoid floyd Donating Member (146 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:34 PM
Response to Original message
5. How's this
Tape a pound of bacon under his front seat.
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LostInAnomie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
7. Have sex with their significant other.
Then tell them about it.
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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:37 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. having sex with this guys wife wouldn't appeal to me even if I were
a lesbian...
He's the kind of guy you wonder how he ever got any woman to even kiss him.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
8. Live a happy life
Best form of revenge ever.
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
9. Forgiveness is the most noble form of revenge.
But if that's not going to work for you, have a cactus sent to him anonymously with a card that says "sit on it."
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:48 PM
Response to Reply #9
16. beautiful post
my nomination for post of the week!
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politicaholic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
12. Download porn onto his computer then email it to a female employee...
from his computer of course.

Make sure the employee is really sensative to that.

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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 10:02 PM
Response to Reply #12
21. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
Renew Deal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:18 PM
Response to Reply #21
28. I would advise against that.
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11 Bravo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:44 PM
Response to Original message
14. Kill him (as long as you don't get caught).
n/t
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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:45 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. well, its a non-death penalty state
so the consequences are less than in other places... I would like my dog to rip his balls off. But I have a really nice dog.
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11 Bravo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:52 PM
Response to Reply #15
17. Actually, the "not getting caught" part is crucial to my plan.
That renders any penalty moot.
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lastknowngood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:53 PM
Response to Original message
18. Get his home address and send out for info on gay porn if he's
stight or regular porn if he gay. Once you get on their mailing list they sell it around and he will never get off their list.
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Les BOOGIE Donating Member (236 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 09:54 PM
Response to Original message
19. google some revenge sites, insulting post cards are cool or
send a paid subscription to some magazine
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FuzzyDicePHL Donating Member (698 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 10:15 PM
Response to Original message
22. Whenever you're in his office
make sure to fart a lot.
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davsand Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 10:41 PM
Response to Original message
23. Pee on his car seat.
Edited on Tue Feb-22-05 10:42 PM by davsand
Make sure you just SOAK it--but do it someplace other than the driver's seat so he won't find it while it is wet. He'll remember you on every hot day for as long as he owns that car.

By way of an alternate, if he has an office, can you put some raw chicken in the vent? That could be a whole lot of "fun" too.

I also like the idea of getting him a subscription to a NAMBLA publication and having it sent to his office address, and maybe even signing him up for some kiddie porn sites while you are at it...

If you are really interested in messing with his world, you could start leaving him creative "love" notes ("Oh baby--you left me breathless last night" or something like that) on his windshield and on his doorstep. It might cause him some real discomfort trying to hide them from his wife.

I dunno--I think you can probably come up with some great stuff on your own if you really work at it.


Laura
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Thor_MN Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 10:45 PM
Response to Original message
24. Sounds like "Tom" a manager I once had
He seemed to enjoy getting his people to argue with one another. Once we figure out why we were all at each other's throats and the arguement's stopped, he seemed to get bored and then quit, probably off to torment another group of unsuspecting people.

Actually, I think part of his performance review was based on keeping salaries low, and while people were fighting, he could use it on their reviews. He was a one trick pony and pulled stakes when it no longer worked.

Best revenge is to outlast him.
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democracyindanger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 10:49 PM
Response to Original message
25. Does he sit in an adjustable chair?
Secretly make it an inch too high or an inch too low. Repeat, you know, liberally.
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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:07 PM
Response to Original message
26. You people are so wonderful!
Great minds at DU! :toast: :party: :party: :toast: :party:
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Occulus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:10 PM
Response to Original message
27. get a bucket of red or blue food color
Edited on Tue Feb-22-05 11:10 PM by kgfnally
and reverse-pump it into his home plumbing via an outdoor spigot. Someone goes to take a shower and..... ;)
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tinfoilinfor2005 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:22 PM
Response to Original message
29. wow, did you people study under karl rove?
let his karma take care of him and take care not to mess up your own.
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HamstersFromHell Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:35 PM
Response to Original message
30. See if you can find any Eosin red dye.
Eosin dye is used in the bookbinding business to stain page edges red (bibles and the like). Mixes with almost ANY liquid or gel, and once on your skin it literally has to wear off....he'll bring blood before it scrubs off.

The possibilities once you get some of it are literally limited only by your own imagination. Things we did to bosses/supervisors included:

Mix Eosin with Vaseline...apply to earpiece of his phone (works great if phone dark colored). Go to another phone and ring his extension, then snicker quietly at his red ear he'll wear the rest of the month.

Likewise, same mixture applied to undersides of car door handles is a load of fun. Also, if car is unlocked, just Vaseline *every* grabbable object in the car...steering wheel, headlight switch, lighter, radio knobs, inside door handles...you get the idea.

Vaseline windshield wipers, then lightly dust his windshield with dirt so the first thing he does is try to wash the windshield.

One of our nastiest tricks for for a supervisor who thought himself gawd's gift to women was to get a female employee to go to the ladies room and purchase a new kotex. Mix Eosin red dye and water and pour onto said napkin. Let dry and place in his jacket pocket. Follow said moran to bar and watch him try to impress the ladies. Then he noticed the lump in his pocket of his jacket and guess what he pulled out in the middle of the bar? The ladies weren't impressed and he was quite alone the rest of the evening. (This could work well with a wife as well...he's got some 'splaining to do!)

Just a few ideas from one who *loves* office pranks!
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Technowitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-22-05 11:40 PM
Response to Original message
31. I once hacked my boss's computer...
...to display the word "HEDGEHOG" subliminally, every ten minutes or so.

And then deleted the resident program when he brought the IT guys in to diagnose the 'weird flickering' and unreadable text.
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madison2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 01:29 AM
Response to Reply #31
32. well my supervisors an IT guy
if he weren't I'd try it
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Stealther Donating Member (85 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 01:57 AM
Response to Reply #32
34. Aren't IT guys the easiest to fool? ;)
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datasuspect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 01:30 AM
Response to Original message
33. put some lsd in the coffeepot?
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Radical Activist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 02:04 AM
Response to Original message
35. As long as you aren't seen doing it
drop a tampon in his/her gas tank. The chemicals will cause all sorts of issues with the car. Also, when it expands it might clog up the fuel injector. It's something that no mechanic will suspect or look for, thus making the repairs expensive.
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Seabiscuit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-23-05 02:25 AM
Response to Original message
36. In his name, order a dump truck to dump a ton of gravel on his lawn C.O.D.
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