DU Women: How much does it bother you when coworkers stare at your chest?

Assume it happens when you are talking to male coworkers and sometimes when you are not.

There's a story I could tell to go along with this, but since it is somewhat embarrassing to me personally I won't tell.

It pisses me the hell off.

Now, a one second glance or whatever doesn't piss me off. I realize it happens. No biggie. Besides, with these bad boys, it's kind of hard NOT to notice them.

BUT what really gets my goat is when it is longer than that, more obvious than that and/or a pattern of behavior.

I have said before "they don't talk, ya know. I'm up here."

Another time, I was in a business meeting (I can't believe I did this) and a guy who was new was being REALLY leery and would NOT stop staring. Just staring and staring and staring. I could even tell when he was looking at the right one, then the left one, then the right one, etc. My friend to the left of me even noticed and whispered to me "Damn, what is his DEAL?"

So finally I said VERY loudly "DO YOU LIKE MY TITS? IS THAT WHY YOU KEEP STARING?"

He looked rather horrified and I had about a second of feeling badly then I said, in a normal voice, "stop staring, I do have eyes."

He didn't even look at me, period, after that. Every woman in that meeting sent me a thank you email after that. I kinda feel bad about it now, but DAMN, the only way it could have been worse is if he let his tongue hang out and actually drooled on the table.

I thought about yelling "ARE YOU THIRSTY OR SOMETHING? Because I'm NOT lactating presently." But I thought that would be too much.

I have a coworker who does that to all of us, old, young, big, small, doesn't matter at all. I keep waiting for the opportunity to say something mean to him, but i work at a school and the kids are always around. Maybe someday.....:-)

I have to admit to an occasional fascination with breasts myself; I try not to stare, since I know it's rude, but sometimes you come across ones that are simply beautiful. Like seeing a great work of art, you can't help but want to look.

But, I try to be discreet, and would never leer at a woman (I hope). Certainly not while talking to them. But then again, the only people who could truly answer that question for me are other women. I hope they would agree with me. But then, I also wish I could ask them - who knows, maybe I'm nowhere near as discreet and honorable and sensitive as I think I am.

So, in conclusion, let me say that I hope I've never pissed a woman off, or made her feel uncomfortable. If I did, it was never intentional.

Crap, now I'm worried.

I find breasts to be quite gorgeous, too (but I have never had sex with a woman), so I am SURE I have checked some out, but I'm a bit paranoid and try to be REALLY discreet about it.

I'm sure you haven't--if you have, someone would have said something by now...aren't you like 78 years old or something? ;-)

But no, I was already 7,000 years old when I was teaching Akhnaten.

What a story! I bet the guy was completely humiliated. He probably stopped doing it to other women in the office too though.

My eyes are up here asshole! Oh please after all what women do to enhance there breasts then they say My eyes are up here asshole! Do you even think for one minute that men really care about your breasts? Women care more about there breasts than we do flame me all you want. As a man we think of other parts. Period! And if any man says different they are lying.

Oh, no wait, they don't that's why breasts are SO totally unimportant and NEVER get any attention at all in our society.

Oh wait, that's wrong.

:crazy:

Excuse me but I do NOTHING to enhance my breasts. In fact, I go out of my way to MINIMIZE them. I wear wire on my rib cage 12 hours a day seven days a week, special bras just to make them LOOK SMALLER, buddy. And that wire sitting on my ribcage does NOT feel good, I can assure you.

I really can't help that one pregnancy over ten years ago made them permanently stay ginormous, much to the apparent delight of total strangers.

But if you actually think that women don't get their breasts stared at a LOT, I'd like to know what color the sky is on your planet.

So... next time a man leers at my chest, even though I wear nothing to accentuate my breasts, and even though I have done nothing to "enhance" them, I should just smile and say, "well, Berserker said that men don't do that... so he must really be looking at something behind me..." as his eyes glaze over.

Thanks, berserker, you've made it so much easier to deal with sexism... just ignore it... that's the ticket!!

Sometimes I wear shirts that are somewhat form fitting but I don't "enhance" them. My uniform shirt at work is not form fitting at all, but I get stared at anyway. I did not enhance my breasts in sixth grade and got harassed even more when I denied stuffing my bra when one boy accused me of that.
Besides this, I have a husband and male friends. They care about breasts.

When women enhance their breasts, they're not doing it for themselves (9 times out of 10). They're doing it because the male focused society has decided that breasts are "hot". There are ads which only contain cleavage shots, for pete's sake.

:loveya:

to cop a feel too.

I have great tits. I can understand their fascination. I made a buck a feel, .50c a titty.

Only for the gay guys.

I wish I was kidding.

34D.

I've never charged a gay guy to feel them. Interesting idea....

done is sometimes wave my arm a bit in front of my chest to try to interrupt the gaze and let them know it's time to start a conversation.

:P

"The Flash" :P

I do like that though, "The Flash", The Flash is kind.

Ray Stevens "The Streak" :D


though i guess that really doesnt fit...

but I think, the great escape or bridge on river kwai theme would be appropriate for Flashy McFlash.

But I really didn't do any flashing, I still had my tank top on! :P

and, you KNEW that there was a possibility that the tank top might get stuck on the shirt and go up too...




















sorry, thinking about it made me faint for a second. Kleeb was lucky he didn't die! :D

maybe you could sue :shrug:

...or at least make her actually marry you

:) its not like shes evil.

and i guess the benefits of almost dying in this case outweigh the negatives :)

She's also great with a pie.

:P

:P

But the story involves a group of my coworkers going out after work a few months ago and one woman making a comment about it (after at least a few drinks) in regard to men in the office in general doing that. There weren't many men in the office so I was seriously embarrassed and felt bad. I felt better when she told me that I was far from being the worst offender. It was the guys who did it all the time that were getting on her nerves, and she said the one guy who was worst about it still didn't stop after she said that. I think some men don't realize they are doing it half the time.

(from the greatest television series of all time)

Anya: I know you like me. I've seen you staring at my breasts.
Xander: I don't want to disappoint you, but generally, when a guy does that, it only means his eyes are open.

What show was that?

Buffy The Vampire Slayer. :hi:

That's why I couldn't ever get into the show. There's just something about her that irritates me. Maybe the evil characters she has played in the past.

That's because I'm not overly endowed, and also because I have an animated face. I voted "other" BTW.

Only if it would make you feel better though.

You'd probably find my chest boring (B cup is for boring, or maybe barely!), and so you'd do what most guys do, and look at my face. I asked my husband once if he thought I was cute, and he said I am. And as I mentioned before, I have an animated face, and that's a lot more interesting than anything else I might be endowed with...But, thank you nonetheless! My self-esteem isn't locked up in my breasts, thank God. LOL.

No eyes seem to get locked on these B cups! :P

A=almost
B=barely (or maybe boring,lol)
C=I forget
D=dang!
DD=double dang!
E=enormous
F=I've fallen, and I can't get up!

There's nothing wrong with B cups! I started at an A cup, alas, many years ago, and when I was nursing my children, I went up to a DD (oh God). It all works out. But my husband fell in love with me when I was an A cup. And we celebrate 40 years of (mostly) blissful marriage this year. You just gotta catch them (men) some other way...Good luck!

:hi:

Well, now she's pregnant, so she's quite a bit bigger and compaining that her bras don't fit, but that's not the point.

I think guys who like the sleeker look must be better at "glancing" than others, because I notice the Bs more than the Ds.

So here's another extended glance for you.

:9

That's very sweet of you. I love extended glances, BTW! My congratulations to you and your wife on the coming child. And also my congratulations to your wife on snaring a lovely, sensitive and obviously caring man!

:hi:

But I've had people stare at my belly and let me tell you I feel no less angry. Hey I'm sorry I don't look like an Olympic athlete but I'm working on it. Too many people judge others by their physical attributes whether it's a bosom or a beer-belly.

What if the guy's old and MIGHT have been cute once, but isn't any more...

Hell, I'd rather stare at your ass, anyway...

you do know, don't you, that we stare at your ass when you walk away too.

I mean, we don't get overtime anymore, our 401(K)'s are worth spit . . .

We have to get some kind of fringe benefit from working.

LOL!

:evilgrin:

A lady was nearby with her friend, another lady. They obviously were coming or going to work, with their work badges hanging from around their necks. Anyway, I thought I could make out the badges were from AMD, in which case I was going to go ask them about if they knew of any hiring. My eyes aren't the greatest, so I kept staring at the badge, trying to make it out. One lady saw me, but what she saw was me staring at her friend's breats. I was horrified. She and her friend really let me have it. All I could do was stammer sorry. I'm gay.. and so not interested in their breasts, but of course that is not what they saw. I still turn red just thinking about it.

:evilgrin:

but we could kick the poll to be sure.

:P

If they ever do that free name change thing again I AM SO DOING THAT! :o

at my knees.

I am the most sincere, nice, honest greatest guys you will ever meet but if their is a woman with a nice chest in front of me, my eyes AUTOMATICALLY will home in on the goods. It's NATURE it's NATURAL it's NORMAL and it's HEALTHY! Enjoy the attention as many women don't get the attention you get and wish they did.

I know and understand it's natural. But. If you like what you see, you'd better find a way, a *respectful,* fun way, to show me you appreciate the view. I was never given a choice about having these, so you'd better make it fun for me, too and let me know you see me as something more than a walking pair of mams.

that usually stops 'em

No...umm...really...well at least not when you were looking!

LOL!! I'll bet it does work.

I'll never forget the time there was a dispute over who had signed for some supplies at work - the vendor said IT WAS THAT BLONDE CHICK WHO DOESN'T WEAR A BRA. *cringe* for the record I *ALWAYS* wear a g.d. BRA - they just kept it so freaking COLD there. :o

He probably couldn't have described what she had been wearing or the color of her eyes either.

:silly: Dolly once said, "I do have big tits. Always had 'em-pushed 'em up, whacked 'em around. Why not make fun of 'em? I've made a fortune with 'em!"

of putting things. She's one hell of a woman.

she said I DON'T KNOW - I'm never there. :D

Because they think it should cost you something, and it's like you're ripping them off.

Maybe if there's enough room to stuff a $5 bill, you should!

A woman that would let you do that would quickly get marauded and beat down by the rest of the union for being a rate-breaker.

Women can stare at whatever the hell they find sexually interesting and no guy I know will give a damn. A wonder why that is.

If you don't make a fortune, the majority of women won't give you the time of day. Our wallets are the equivalent. It doesn't matter how good looking witty or debonair a guy might be, if he ain't got the dough then he's SOL. It's all about the benjamins, the BMW and the bling.

Am I right ladies?

Sad but true.

Flaming will commence . . . . now!

That's just wonderful.

My parents divorced at an early age and my mother made more and had steadier employment than my dad in their divorced state. We thought that our mother was a strong woman who was successful on her own. Then she married an upper middle class guym when we were in upper elementary school, who was rich for our town, in part because she was having trouble paying the bills. Once they were married, this man turned out to to be a complete a**hole in general and abusive to my sister and I. It was never our ideal to be a rich man. We want to be strong women and we never want to feel that we are in any way dependent on an a**hole because he has money.

doesn't bother me as much as it used to but this statement is on behalf of all who are treated this way

one stares at a womans legs ......

exuse : " very shy ... must lower head"

:smoke:

I would have automatically assumed that all the DU women would find it an affront and not even taken the poll.

I'll just be up front about this: I LOVE breasts. Absolutely love them. Cleavage? Love it. Sweaters? Love them. Cardigans should never have gone out of style. Anything low cut? Love it. When a shawl comes off to show a strapless dress? Wow.

That said, I do my absolute best to focus on a woman's FACE. If she's wearing something really eye-catching, and I find myself wanting to drop the eyes down, I'll stare at the spot between her eyebrows (hopefully, there IS a spot between her eyebrows). I'm sure I fail from time to time (hopefully not constantly) but dammit, I sure do TRY to be courteous. I think of the constant breast-stare as depersonalizing and I don't want to be insulting like that.

And I'll close with this: An engaging face and great conversation are more important than anything else. I like physical attributes, but there's gotta be more. I'd divorce Jessica Simpson in a month. The first two weeks might be a hell of a lot of fun, but damn, I couldn't deal with dumb as a bag of rocks for long. Give me smart/funny/engaging and a B cup any day.

Plus, mine are kinda hard to NOT notice. :) There are worse things in my life than having my breasts stared at. Gotta keep it in perspective. :P

and she called me on it too!

Love at first sight for both of us...

Most women don't like it, but if the guy staring at their chest was Brad Pitt, Denzel Washington or (insert other dream guy here), they wouldn't mind so much. Of course, there aren't many guys like that out there, so it's generally annoying at best.

woman doing it either... it's disrespectful. Sure, I love breasts as much as any man... believe me... but I am certain not to stare at them because I know how it feels to be objectified. It's called respect... and I doubt that Brad Pitt or Denzel Washington go around staring at women's chests anyway.

It's disrespectful.

And it's interesting how many men in this thread maintain how "okay" it is, even though just as many women are saying it's *not* okay.

Ever. :7

A lot of men in general seem to glance at my chest, but staring is making a conscious choice to overstep their bounds. If I'm not in a relationship with the man, my breasts aren't really his business. He can glance or think whatever he chooses to think, but he should keep the stares and the comments to himself. Sure I like to look attractive, but I had my fill of harassment from creeps because of my breasts by the time I was 15.

:grr: That's not right in the workplace :nopity: no way! The guy's a jerk!

Stares and tries to pretend he's not staring: not good.

Stares and smiles and tells me I look nice today: earns him a laugh and if I'm comfortable enough, a *minor* PDA (we have a small, very easy-going, family-like office).

... as much as anyone, but guys that stare like drooling puppies are a disgrace to my gender.

Nothing says "I'm a fool, I haven't had any in months, or I'm just a stupid asshole" than staring at a woman.

Here's how it's done. You glance and take a mental photo. You refresh it with occasional repeat glances. If you stare, you are violating one of the simple rules of common decency.

I'm a person too, not a sex object. I've had the misfortune of being an early bloomer and being harassed about my breasts since I was 11.

I have no chest to speak of. I often find them staring at my rear, or trying to, even when they are talking to me. While it's often quite amusing to see them when I catch them, it still anooys the hell outta me.

Let's just say Blondie's got back.

so if anyone looks at it, then I probably spilled food on my shirt or something.

But if I did have a chest, I would definitely get annoyed if coworkers stared at it.

Here's a question for y'all:

When you're a teacher, the students are SUPPOSED to be watching you.

So one time when I wore a really cute new sweater, one of students (who usually acts bored in class and makes a point of it) was very attentive. I was quite sure that this was my "great teacher" moment, that I was finally getting through with my brilliance and persistence.

When I asked him a question in class, however, it became clear that he wasn't paying much attention to anything I was saying, and it became pretty obvious what he was watching (and, BTW, I'm no Hooters gal--just one of those boring B's).

So then what do you do? Be glad that he's at least not acting bored any more?

And Binoculars !!

I See Beauty In Every Women I See, Somtimes It's They're Breast, Somtimes Eyes, Hair... But I Try My Best Not To Stare No Matter What...It's Rude

it's hard wired into me to glance but I catch myself instantly and look upward. Sorry ladies, it's almost like a reflex.

notice I am looking and I look back up but then a few minutes later it will happen again. I truly don't have any control over it other than catching myself and then looking up.

and does not realize what he is doing? Thats me, but then I catch myself and look up afraid I will be caught looking but sometimes the trance is too powerful and she has to slap me across the face to bring me back to reality. Well, I have never been slapped but the rest is accurate. I don't mean to be disrespectful but it just happens like some witch put a spell on me.

what gets stared at. It is extremely irritating, to say the very least. :eyes:

Sometimes I want to open my shirt and show them how low it goes, how scary it looks, and tell them the whole painful story. I wonder, if I do that, will they still stare next time they talk to me.