And God Created Canada . . .

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And God Created Canada

Finally a joke that explains what it's like to be Canadian..


Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been? "


God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made." Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said,


"What is it?"


"It's a planet," replied God," and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place of great balance. Balance? inquired Michael.


Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."


The Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large landmass in the top corner and asked, What's that one?



Ah, said God. That's Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline.

The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace.


I'm also going to give them super-human, undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all who come across them.


Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed;


"What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!"


God replied wisely.


"Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them...."

It's good to know that God and I are on the same page about those bastards.

TlalocW

signed,

a loud-mouthed bastard. :)

Not that sissy-fied "University Sport Football" or whatever the hell you call it. You can HAVE the shitty old Vanier Cup. We have the BCS!!!!!

:D:D:D

If you are going to make the field 110 yards (i.e 100 meters) to be metric, drop the other fucking shoe and do the demarcation in meters as well!

:-)

good one

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:shrug:

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:dunce:

I really enjoyed that ^^

And your punch line made me LOLOLOL!

Thank you so much!

From a SoCal loudmouth!

:hi:

:kick:

Sure, Eskimos are loud and offensive, but if you lived in a barren tundra, you would be pretty pissed off too.

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we luv our Eskimos, they are unique to Canada

and they are neither loud nor offensive

they leave that to those below our southern border . . :silly:

I was saying, as an American, that I couldn't imagine that you were talking about us.
So I picked the Eskimos as someone else around Canuck way

They also live in Alaska and Greenland

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Yah I'm a googler

and I hate being innacurate -

I'm sure I DID know that Eskimos weren't just in Canada: - way back in my school-days - -

oh well

I enjoyed the "google-tour" of a wee bit of History . .



Provideniya (also known as Buhta Provideniya) is a town in the northeastern part of the Chukotka region, which is in turn the northeasternmost region of the Russian Far East. It is across the Bering Strait from Alaska, and is very close to the International Date Line.

Most of the town's estimated 2,000 residents are Yupik, a branch of the Eskimos. Despite the religious significance of its name (it is Russian for Providence, as in Divine Providence), the name was never changed during the Soviet era, although a large statue of Lenin was erected there, and still stands.



http://www.explore-places.com/world_geography/P/Provideniya.html


A couple of pics I snagged - -








I didn't reallise that Russia had land so close to the US!

and they are worried about N Korea??

heck

Russia could THROW a nuke into Alaska . .

be nice to Putin Junior . .

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I did laugh.

I needed that today

:)