Know of any kick-ass housecleaning ideas for the SLOTHFUL??

OMFG, help me. SO much to do, only the remainder of today and tomorrow to get it done. I could use ideas about how to do things quickly as well as recipes for legal stimulants -- stuff that'll get me off my ample ass.

HELP!

I'm in major sloth-mode myself. The only solution I can see is finding a new house - moving would be easier than cleaning this one!

I top to bottom clean my house every weekend...All by myself for the most part.

I thought you were dead!!!

:rofl:

I thought it was an ex-girlfriend, with whom early morning lovemaking on a Saturday was out of the question if we were at her house. She was up at 5 to begin her housecleaning . . .

I'm glad she's an ex. Anyone who would clean house instead of having sex needs professional help.

Holy crap, I'M glad!

I don't get up at 5 AM....But there are times when I don't get to bed until 3 AM!

When you finish eating them, rinse your plate and put it the dishwasher! After that, take out the trash!

She never said "Hush" unless she wanted me to "see if you can find my Hush Puppies."

YOU FRAUD!!!!!!!!

SHUT UP!

I am not a fraud...I am a mom...just not yours!

Wanna come clean my house?

1. Laundry. That's the easy part.
2. Clean kitchen. That's Mrs. V.'s job, because I loathe it, and she is kind.
3. Serious farking unclutterage.
4. Bathrooms.
5. Vacuuming, dusting, carpet cleaning.
6. Taking stuffing out of couch cushions, washing the stuffing in the utility sink and the covers in the washer (2 at a time on gentle), drying, re-stuffing, and hoping Richard never annoints the couch again.

3 and 4 are probably the most daunting. 6 is probably a project for another weekend.

We're having a loan officer in on Monday, so . . .

Hide stuff in the oven. Seriously. He's not going to look in there, right? Just be sure not to turn it on until you remove the stuff :evilgrin:

Also for uncluttering, get big boxes and stuff stuff in them and put them on the closet floor -- if they're neatly stacked, they'll look okay. Better yet, put them in the attic or basement if you have one.

I won't leave a room until everything in it is DONE. Also, I have learned not to sit down until I'm done with everything I plan to do that day, except laundry of course. Once I sit down, chances are the cleaning spree is over.

This is especially true for the uncluttering. Don't leave the room until it's clutter free!

Laundry is fun if you have washer and dryer, most of the time you're just letting the machines do their stuff while you internet.

#2 you have delegated, excellent.

#3. Shove it all in a room you will keep locked when visitors appear and unclutter at your leisure or maybe never as long as the door can be closed and locked.

#4. FOrmula 409 or even just Chlorox makes short work of that.

#5. Debatable if this needs to be done but if time allows, go for it.

#6. Don't know who Richard is but the cushions will never be the same anyway, so don't waste your time. Toss the couch and next time go with Naugahyde or even real leather if you've got the bux.

See how easy that was? With housework, if all else fails, lower your standards.

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72

works for me.

Thanks anyway.

so just wait.

with them and they can help you clean up a bit? In return you either cook dinner for them or take them out for dinner?
I always find that if I have company around, I can get things done better.
EDIT: I totally empathize. I have a sign on my door.
It says

heartbeat. Good idea, though.

If someone's coming over for just a moment, you can hide dirty dishes in the oven. :evilgrin:

I've had to go back to doing my own housework recently, and I divide the house up by rooms and do one room a weekend. That way, it takes a full 7 weeks to do the whole thing, but I can cope with it in that much disarray. If I felt I had to do the whole thing in one weekend, I'd never do any of it!

I can quick clean in under an hour if someone is coming over and I can confine them to the living room and the bathroom nearby. A couple years ago though, our lanlord was having the house appraised. My husband was away and I had to clean it by myself. I called in sick the next day because I cleaned for almost 15 hours straight overnight. I was horribly disappointed when the appraiser spent less than 10 minutes in the house.

Then the appraisal, probably also sometime next week. :scared:

:P

The loan officer doesn't care. He's going to worry about your finances and leave the state of the house to the appraiser. Treat his visit like a casual guest.

When we first bought the house, we had a home inspection. That was pretty detailed, but it didn't involve any issues of cleanliness.

When we refinanced, the house was reappraised, but that was a much shorter process and mostly involved the size of the rooms.

It's no doubt true that making a good impression on the appraiser can help you out by a few thou, but I don't know how big the effect is. Oddly enough, the only two things our appraiser focused on was that the garden was nice. She really remarked on that. Plus, she looked me in the eye and said, "you do use that garage for an office or a garage, RIGHT, because that's worth more than if you just use it for storage."

A feather duster speeds up dusting dramatically. I hate dusting.

low lighting.

here in the batcave.

Twenty-watt bulbs. Tops.

ONE ROOM AT A TIME. Clear all surfaces, stow all clutter, toss ANYTHING that is old, broken, or obviously trash. Be brutal. Then clean walls/ceilings of cobwebs, vaccuum, wash floors, dust, clean glass and mirrored surfaces, and polish.

To stay energized: DISCO MUSIC -- even if you hate it. That 120 beats per minute will keep you moving. Shots of cafe (expresso) if you like it. For liquid energy other than coffee, try those RED BULL or other energy drinks (they have them in diet, I understand), or one of those high caffeine soft drinks, if the caffeine doesn't drive you over the edge.

If you take breaks, set a timer--no more than ten minutes per hour. Don't eat a lot of starchy food on your break, or turkey, or milk products, or too sweet stuff--it will put you to sleep. A bit of protein, and move on.

Start plowing, as you finish each room, congratulate yourself. Think of your favorite reward, and promise it to yourself AFTER you have everything done.

reference!!! Wow! You should open a business!

Throw stuff out. Play dancin' music. Order delivery food so you don't have to stop to cook.

I have what I need -- especially "don't leave a room until it's uncluttered" and "play beaten music" and the systematic suggestions.

THANK YOU!

The rest you can just shove into a closet if visitors are impending.

I am a great believer in Formula 409 but don't use on painted surfaces.

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72

:P

That in Bush's Murkica if it feels good it's illegal. But Limbaugh, Bennett, Gingrich, et al. will do it, anyway.

it's easier if you do a little every week, that's what I have found. I used to be terrible about this til I had a kid.

I try to spot clean the bathroom every night a little bit ( my kid is messy) so that when I clean bathrooms it isn't as bad. IF you do a reasonable cleanup every week, it is so much easier.

I also like the 10 second tidy... (like on the PBS cartoon) for the living room... pile up the newspapers, clean off the coffee table, vacuum and straighten up the throws and pillows on the couch.

Mop the kitchen floor... that always makes things look better.

Generally this kind of cleaning is sufficient for most visitors. If I am having a party or new babysitter, I do more.

ENjoy your "comfy clutter" - that's what we call it. :)