I hate middle-aged women who don't know how to behave in resturaunts!

Yesterday LeftyDad, LeftyKid and I go to a resturaunt. It's a family friendly place, with a kid's menu and crayons and a bar for the people who don't want to be near kids.

So we're sitting there eating our meal, LeftyKid is coloring on the menu and drinking his juice because he's not hungry. Next to our table is a booth with half a dozen middle-aged women. At first I thought they were drinking, but it turned out they were just really loud people with no sense of decorum. As a result, I learned way to much about thier sex lives, and LeftyKid undoubtely heard all of it too. Thankfully he's four, so he had no clue what they were talking about.

Can resturaunts do something about perverted empty-nesters who carry on loud conversations about thier sex lives with children all around? I'd suggest ball gags, but these ladies probably would've been into it.

and Sex in the City
and Desperate Housewives
and......

For helping women act like sophomoric college frat assholes!

I need a break.

Heathen!

... in public?

:shrug:

... not bellowing like a foghorn about ones genital exploits while other people are trying to eat dinner.

For a start.

I was asking for a definition.

not worth it.

the republican women.

The place was packed.

Definitely Republicans though (they were also discussing how much money thier husbands make.)

but you hope you won't have to put up with them at family places. *SIGH* Can't kids keep their middle-aged parents at home if they don't know how to behave?

:rofl:

or not.

We had just been to a "Pure Romance" party and were pretty revved up (excuse the pun) about our new toys.

:blush:

restaurants with noisy kids or screaming babies. Not yours though!

right after taxicab confessions on HBO

Note the lack of high chairs in that resturaunt. ;)

They have no place in a restaurant where I'm trying to relax and eat a good meal-- first thing you know I'm surrounded by whining little whelps with parents who won't lift a hand to control them or shut them up.

all over the place while their parents are ignoring them.

I KNEW it was coming.

It's all their fault!!

:popcorn:

Just don't sit at the next table when I'm in the room!

:evilgrin:

how many posts did it take? 6,8? ;)

Did you skip the part where I mentioned LeftyKid coloring quietly while sipping his apple juice? There were three other kids younger than him in the area where our table was, all behaving.

If you want to eat without kids around, find a bar that serves food. As I said, this was a place with high chairs, crayons etc. If these ladies wanted to eat someplace where they could have an adult conversation without concern for the little ears nearby, an appropriate resturaunt (no kids menu, nobody takes kids there) was just across the walkway.

I believe children should be locked into a soundproof closet until they're sixteen, at which time said children should be exported to Europe.

But that's just me.

(Honestly, I really love the little nose pickers-- just not in the same room as me!)

at the top for air and for the sending of food through a straw. Then, at age sixteen, Plug up the hole!" -Mark Twain

so my husband and I could enjoy a nice tantrum-free meal.

Not that adults can't be annoying; they sure can be. The difference is that if you ask an adult to lower his voice, he will usually comply. If he doesn't, you can always talk to management. But politely ask a parent to make an effort to quiet a screaming child, and up go the defenses.

"Clearly you are not a parent. Weren't you a child once?" they'll sniff.

The answer is yes, I was a child once. And I was taught manners at home. Screaming and running around during a meal wasn't tolerated at home, and it certainly wouldn't have been tolerated in a restaurant. Unlike so many parents, mine did not feel they had a right to drag us kids everywhere and make other people miserable.

and I talk about whatever I want wherever I want. It's not my problem.

There's that whole "ready the child for the path not the path for the child issue" here. Sorry if your kid overhears, but it's a free country. These chicks could talk about whatever they wanted.

I congratulate you for having a well-behaved child, but plenty of parents bring their kids to restaurants with bars. There is no way of knowing if there will be screaming kids where you eat.

Likewise, there is no way of knowing if there will be sexually adventurous women at the next table.

Kinda sucks, huh?
FSC

not fit for a toddler is to be avoided. I seriously doubt they have such problems in Europe as I have the impression that in Europe the parents actually rule the roost.

These women were at their table without children and were probably enjoying a rare night out without their kids. If their talk offended your sensitivities a polite request asking them to lower their voices would have been in order. They have as much right to eat anywhere they so please without having to censor their speech.

Yep, sometimes asking folks to lower their voices causes them to realize how loud they're being and rein it in a bit. Sometimes, it works, other times it backfires and turns regular people into jerks.

But the same goes for us "no kids" folks asking parents to control their children, n'est ce pas?

:hi:
FSC

and speak loudly about your sex life? I'm an adult and I don't want to hear about some stranger's sex life.

For that matter, who wants to sit next to anyone who is so loud you can follow the whole conversation, regardless of what the topic is?

better in the bar, not where little ears can hear. Cuz then they might repeat it when you are least expecting it. ;)

good one about the ball gag.

listening to the intimate details of other diner's sex lives than to hear a few children's voices. . . yes. . .

:sarcasm:

I should have placed bets.

high school kids do the same thing, also 20 something, 30 something, whatever. 10% of any demographic is comprised of people who are all too willing to talk about their sex lives, and probably 10% of that group will do so loudly in public places.

I think you should have gone over and asked them to keep it down OR complained to your server and asked to see the manager. Chances are they stiffed the server, too; some people have no class.

adults. It could have been kids, it could have been men. She had a bad time with ill mannered adults. You have my sympathy.

:popcorn:

should be escorted out of restaurants and told to learn how to behave in civil society.

Redstone

if you're loud enough I can hear you from at least two booths away, you need to leave. I'm being generous with the two booths thing. Occassional laughter doesn't count, but continuous assholish laughter does.

I don't understand why some people seem to want the restaurant to hear them.

"I don't understand why some people seem to want the restaurant to hear them."
I'm not sure why they need attention, but acting like an ass with their buddies in public, may be their way of getting it.

went to a nice Mexican restaurant, it was late in the evening so not to crowded the old man setting behind us was the most negative person I've ever heard. Talking about how the clean up they were doing was mostly for show and it's probably been 20 years since the carpet was actually cleaned, the waitstaff was dressed to frumpily "like they just came in from picking tomatoes" can't believe you gotta pay an extra $2.50 for a dish of guacamole, shit like that the whole time we where there. We finished first and when we got up to leave I turned around and sarcastically said "thanks for a most pleasant dining experience" He harrumphed and turned away. I hate people like that I ask maddad if he saw the person who was holding the gun to his head to make him eat there.

monolgue!
(W giving a horse a hand job):spray: :blush: :spray: :rofl:

with disinterested third parties:

I want a bumper sticker that says "Must we ALL share your bad taste in music?"

OTOH, I live in a concealed carry state, so I'd never really have the nerve to use it.

I grew up in a neighborhood where it was common in the summer time for people to open all their windows and blast their stereos, sometimes late into the night. I hated it it, even as a kid. I couldn't stand apartment living as an adult because of it. It drove me to become a homeowner sooner that I probably would have otherwise. I never blast my music and bother other people. And I still manage to enjoy it. It's rude and inconsiderate. :rant:

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

RL

and they accepted, you would have had to PM half this board!

Sorry, but I'd rather a table full of women acting a wee bit loony than a group of 2 year-olds screaming and throwing food about, while parents giggle at the little one's "spunk.'

Does anyone remember the time when parents would NEVER take young kids to restaurants? It was expected to be a relaxing time for the adults. My parents would take us to ONE restaurant, and that was only on the way back from seeing my aunt and uncle in upstate CT. Everything else was babysitter time.

Ah, the good old days....

<ducking>

It is frustrating putting up with loud, obnoxious men in restaurants. Or loud, obnoxious women. Or loud, obnoxious college kids.

For some reason, mention an unpleasant experience with loud, obnoxious children, or parents who change diapers right at the table, or getting run into by a monster SUV stroller, and the sensitive folks get their knickers in a twist.

Why doesn't DU have a childfree group? It would be nice to have a safe space where childfrees and sensible parents could go to rant.

Babies and toddlers can be a handful.. most parents take them outside when they get too loud and bored. My child is generally very well behaved in restaurants.

But I do think we have to remember that kids like to laugh and play a little, and I don't really agree with the "children should be seen and not heard" philosophy that probably terrorized a great number of us in our youth. I like to hear kids laughing and singing in a restaurant. They are happy kids enjoying themselves. It makes me happy to see them happy. Running around, being bratty, that's another story.

Considering all the times I'm been to restaurants and have had the experience totally ruined by kids who won't behave, and whose parents won't make them behave.

So I say - YOU GO GIRLS!!! Wreck the KIDS' outing for a change! :evilgrin:

with a well-behaved child. Sounds pretty fucking stupid and insensitive to me.

Just that they might have to sit quietly and put up with it, like you have to do with people's kids.

Like I did a few weeks ago at a nice restaurant when this kid next to us yelled "I WANT MOMMY!" at the top of her lungs for about 20 minutes. I was very very nice and kept my mouth shut, and resisted the overwhelming urge to tell her "Your mommy is DEAD."

...lower their voices or turn down their music. We are so afraid of...well I don't know what...but we won't just try to politely ask others to be a little considerate.

Just what are we afraid of?


well...one time at a concert (Todd Rundgren at the Tower Theatre in about 1990) two girls behind me insisted on having a loud conversation during the concert. Furtive glances back didn't work so I finally asked them to please stop talking.

I was rewarded with gum in my hair.

Assholes!

Like I paid $30 to listen to your conversation!

and we had a great time, did not let it ruin our night.
she's very polite, and has learned that yeah, adults swear and talk about stuff she can't understand, let alone repeat.
she told me, "when i grow up and have job and real problems, i'm allowed to say "F" and "D" and be an "A" sometimes, because i've earned it. "
at least she's learned to enjoy an evening out, and not find an excuse to be all pissy and ruin the evening.

Does it really matter if the people acting up are little kids, teenagers, middle-aged, elderly, or in any other age category?

Acting rudely is acting rudely. Period. The only difference between a kid and an adult is that the parents are responsible for their children's behavior (some parents forget this), while adults are responsible for their own.

I would consider it rude for any stranger to be discussing their sex lives loud enough for me to hear (unless I was at a bar or party or something), just as I would consider it to be rude for a parent to let their child scream at the top of their lungs in a public place. Neither are sounds I want to hear.

of a few months back.

I just wanted to make the point that sometimes the young children are well-behaved and the adult diners are the disruptive ones.

and as a social pariah I would probably have stayed at home, however I know this society hates middle aged women, especially those who don't have the decorum around children that is desired by our betters who are happily married and have shown their ability to have worth in life.

As my father always said, a good college education gives you a fancy way to say, . . . (censored for the children).

One of my favorite dead horse topics! Oh, yay, this is the happiest that I've ever been since the demise of ATA!

And I get to trot this out again! Whoopee!

<ope>

This thread's sort of taken a twist on it, but it's a lot of the same fun. Almost as enjoyable as cat vs. bird. :evilgrin:

Although I think I already have done so with another post.

and watch a good flamefest. :popcorn:

Besides, my opinions are always boring because they're so middle of the road. They are absolutely no fun to post. :evilgrin:

And mentioned something about getting a dictionary and looking up the word "public" so I guess my sideline standing would be pointless now.

until you're feeling nice and toasty from the flames. Jump in! I think you need to opine a bit more firmly on whichever side it is until you draw some more fire. :evilgrin:

for the ATA forum. ATA withdrawal sucks. How will I know where all the good flame wars are?

Have I perchance missed something?

It was a place where you could post questions or air grievances for the Admins.

you just wait my dear, my revenge on you is that you will become one!

I hate middle aged women who feel the need to nearly shout about thier sex lives with my son five feet away. I'd feel the same about old men or young people or half a dozen attractive persons of my own age. I have no desire to explain to LeftyKid why a woman would have whipped cream on her breasts when I just wanted to have a bowl of soup and an afternoon out of the house as a family.

I promise that if I ever become that classless in my middle age, I'll at least do so in an adults-only venue or a room with no children in it.

BTW, these ladies were all coaches in some youth sports league. They really ought to know what some topics aren't appropriate conversation in earshot of children.

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

but LeftyKid really hasn't got the relavent background material or language to understand the explanation of why somebody'd to that. (He's a curious kid, he's want to know why that lady plays with food when we've explained that adults and big kids don't play with food.) I shouldn't have to risk explaining people's sexual recreations just by getting lunch.

I wouldn't have cared if the conversation was kept at a volume one could easily ignore. These women were *loud* enough that I initially thought they were inebriated.

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Sex is complicated and I'd prefer to explain it in private. LeftyKid doesn't even understand the differences between boys and girls.

I'll remember next time I'm about to discuss metaphysics or cosmology in a restaurant. :)

...get laid.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

in total agreement. They should have kept it clean in front of the kid

No one should say anything ever just in case there might be a child nearby. The whole world should be covered in bubblewrap to protect Our Future!

Don't you realize it's today's children who will be staffing The Nursing Home All Childfree People Go To? You're just asking to be left with skidmarks. :sarcasm:

Get out the bubblewrap for The Future!

:eyes:

The issue isn't kids-in-restaurants; rather, it's that talking about one's sex life in public just isn't kosher. Don't be surprised that certain posters would label you a Puritan--these are, after all, the people who have a proclivity for posting threads like "Do you want to see my hairy pussy"? (oh, I get it, he's talking about his cat, ha-ha).

One of the first responders nailed it: Oprah nation/Desperate Housewives/Sex and the City somehow gave these classless people license to blab on and on about intimate affairs. Worse still, these bourgeois enterprises actually made it seem empowering.

Lorien is a SHE, and it was a funny, double entendre post about cats. Big deal.

Geez. Lighten the fuck up.
FSC

and I find those threads assinine, and actually, I find them PRUDE. Only to a PRUDE would that joke be funny.

As far as "just isn't kosher", your self-definiton of "class", etc -- that is the same line of thinking that every religious fundamentalist has, except they apply it more widely.

who can be heard more than two feet away from their table should immediately have all of their ramaining food doggy-bagged and be escorted off the premises to the cheers and applause of the other patrons.

"Good Riddance" shall be sung to the tune of "Happy Birthday" by the waitstaff.

Does that about cover it?

Perhaps if you asked your waitress to mention that the place is a 'family' restaurant that might get them to keep their bawdy talk to a more respectable level.


On the flip side, I always have a problem with people who bring their loud mouthed kids to restaurants and do nothing to constrain their voices. Apparently these kids have never been taught anything about using their "indoor voices". So our dinner is always interrupted by constantly yelling children who jump up and down on the seats! ;(

If someone violates my earspace, it really doesn't matter what they are talking about. They should just stfu.

And about noise polluter's rather than a certain age group. It should cover ear pollution at all age levels.

How dare women speak in public to one another? Indeed, it is an outrage.

If I come into a restaurant, I expect everyone to behave exactly as I want them too. If they don't, they need to get the fuck OUT!

Actually, this applies to every situation all the time. If you don't behave the way I think you should, you need to die and get off my planet.

Such a diversity of opinion! Personally, I just hate rude people, of whatever age. I despise parents who let their kids run wild in public, I despise people who blab loudly on the cell phone at the next table and I despise those who seem to think their intimate conversation must be of interest to the entire restaurant. It's not the age of the perpetrator, it's the rudeness that bugs me.

Someone said that with adults you can call the manager or ask them to quiet down. HA! I say. HA! I'll say again. No, rude people do not respond to polite requests. They feel offended that anyone would even think of asking them to be polite (as some on this very thread seem offended, commenting that they have every right to talk loudly about whatever they want in public. Yes, of course they have the right but I have the right to be annoyed and find it very rude. Just because you have the right to do something doesn't mean it's not extremely rude and insensitive to do).

Hubby and I were at a restaurant recently where we were seated at a booth quite near the lobby area. A family of three, father, mother and son in his 20's moved from the lobby to stand directly beside our booth while they waited to be seated. The lobby was not overly crowded, the woman was wearing enough perfume to immobilize a regiment of cavalry (including the horses) and the man had his ass right in my face.

After waiting a while for them to move, we finally asked them politely to do so. They pretended not to hear us. Raising my voice slightly, I said, "Excuse me, could you go stand in front of someone else's table for awhile?" The son then got belligerent and asked if there was a problem. I told him there was, that they were blocking our table and disrupting our meal. He told me it was our problem and they had the right to stand wherever they want.

We called the manager over who twisted his hands in knots and explained there was little he could do. :wtf: We informed him that it was the last time we would eat in his establishment. Yes, speaking to adults and managers works real well. It was a very unpleasant meal.

To me, there's a major difference between loud, obnoxious toddlers in restaurants and loud, obnoxious middle-aged women in restaurants: the latter group is supposed to know better.

Sure, unsupervised or poorly supervised children in restaurants might be annoying (though, honestly, I can't think of a time I've wanted to get out of there because of them; there have been a couple of instances in grocery stores), but I tend to get more annoyed at the parents than the children. But unruly, obnoxious adults of whatever age get to me more; have fun but what's wrong with being aware of your surroundings?

Besides, shouldn't the same folks who bitch about kids going to upscale restaurants (being middle class, from a small town, and not having the "correct" elitist attitude about dining, I can't claim any real familiarity with these sorts of restaurants) have a problem with crude-talking adults dining at a "family" establishment? Looks like a double standard to me...

And FTR, I have no children (I'm not even married or anywhere near it) and don't particularly plan to. Maybe I just tend to side with the children here because I think there is still some small semblance of hope for them. The adults have already shown what a great job they can do at screwing up this world.

Should they not have been visiting the sick? Knitting as they watched the Lawrence Welk Show? How dare those "perverted" empty-nesters spoil an evening of wholesome family togetherness?



Noise can be quite unpleasant, no matter the source. Why didn't you indicate to Management that you were Not Amused?