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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:47 AM
Original message
Please Give Me Some Really Really Bad Advice...
Seriously!
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
1. Here, take this bobby pin...and stick it in that electrical outlet.
Let's see what happens. :hi:
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XNASA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:48 AM
Original message
Righty Loosey, Lefty Tighty.
Edited on Tue Jun-21-05 11:48 AM by XNASA
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nothingshocksmeanymore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
2. It's ok to put pots with plastic handles in the oven
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:49 AM
Response to Reply #2
5. I actually did that
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
3. I think you should call him, like, twenty times today...while he's at work
:hi:
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:49 AM
Response to Original message
4. There is no danger in taking a radio into the bubble bath with you
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:49 AM
Response to Original message
6. You should quit your job and take up drug smuggling
It's easy and fun!
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:49 AM
Response to Original message
7. Go ahead...Leave your puppy outside all day while you're at work!
Especially in the summer! Puppies love being outside in the summer!!!
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:50 AM
Response to Reply #7
10. But I only have kittycats - will they be ok
:shrug:
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:54 AM
Response to Reply #10
21. Sure! Just make sure you declaw them first!
:thumbsup:
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #21
35. jinx!
:hi:
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:10 PM
Response to Reply #35
42. GMTA!!!
:hi:
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:54 AM
Response to Reply #10
22. just make sure you de-claw them first
and then the great outdoors is a magical playland! :bounce:
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:50 AM
Response to Reply #7
11. In the car.
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UrbScotty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:50 AM
Response to Reply #7
12. No... Leave Fido in your car during the summer! (nt)
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UrbScotty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:49 AM
Response to Original message
8. Vote GOP (nt)
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:50 AM
Response to Original message
9. Always cut the blue wire first...
That's what they say in the movies.
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edbermac Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
13. Never dry your hair in a microwave oven...
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #13
19. or a puppy, but kittens dry up real nice
Edited on Tue Jun-21-05 11:56 AM by sui generis
after they splode

(my evil twin just said that)
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Jara sang Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
14. Listen to the corporate media.
They know what's best for you. They have your best interests at heart.
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
15. Good advice is often annoying, bad advice never.
sorry if I have not annoyed you enough

:evilgrin:
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Patiod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
16. Go play poker with a guy named "Doc", eat at "Mom's" and
hire yourself a lawyer who refers to the police as "the federales".
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HeeBGBz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
17. It's okay to juggle butcher knives
All it takes is a little practice.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
18. Don't act too smart, the boys don't like that.
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Richardo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:53 AM
Response to Original message
20. If you just hunch over and turn away, the wasps will not sting you.
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Cannikin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:54 AM
Response to Original message
23. You wont get pregnant the first time.
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #23
25. I've heard a coke douche is good insurance...
That's what they say.
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:55 AM
Response to Original message
24. I think you should date that weird guy with all the guns and
the meth lab :o
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #24
26. so what are you doing Friday night
:wow:
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:57 AM
Response to Original message
27. The best way to calm an angry bear
Is to walk right up to it and grasp it firmly by the jowls. Trust me, it works. O8)
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:58 AM
Response to Original message
28. E before I and always before U
Their U go
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simpleplan Donating Member (37 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 11:58 AM
Response to Original message
29. No need for Birth control, just a good trampoline.
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davsand Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:00 PM
Response to Original message
30. Go ahead and marry him. He'll quit seeing her.
Oh--and he'll probably quit drinking too.


Laura
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RPM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:00 PM
Response to Original message
31. Try to take a Cop's gun
they like that game.
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VOX Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:01 PM
Response to Original message
32. Plastic cups dry just great on the bottom rack of the dishwasher...
Plus, you'll get all kind of interesting new shapes!
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wtmusic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:02 PM
Response to Original message
33. Go hiking in some deep, deep mud n/t
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #33
34. smartass
:grr:
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Strawman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
36. You should go to Gary, Indiana on your next vacation
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #36
38. Newark, New Jersey is better this time of year
:P
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Strawman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:07 PM
Response to Reply #38
39. Only if you're into blue skies, fresh air and scenic landscapes
Edited on Tue Jun-21-05 12:08 PM by Strawman
Three Mile Island is another hot spot for nature lovers this time of year.
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Pool Hall Ace Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
37. Even if your DH doesn't want any more children
go ahead and go off birth control. He'll learn to love the little one!
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:08 PM
Response to Reply #37
41. what's a DH
Designated Hitter?
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Pool Hall Ace Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:28 PM
Response to Reply #41
54. DH = dear husband
But if you're talking baseball, yes, DH = designated hitter. :hi:
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Hand Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:08 PM
Response to Original message
40. Vote Republican... nt
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Schema Thing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:12 PM
Response to Original message
43. Go ahead, you'll be safe so long as they know you're an American.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:13 PM
Response to Original message
44. Use the New York Post as your bible
It's all truth, the whole truth & nothing but the truth.
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Steve Nash is god 13 Donating Member (353 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:13 PM
Response to Original message
45. spit on georgie or walk up to a cop and shoot him
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Brewman_Jax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:15 PM
Response to Original message
46. Run with scissors open around a swimming pool
THAT'LL prove interesting. :rofl:
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:16 PM
Response to Original message
47. Maximum Strength Drano is hormone-activated - be sure to swish
it around your mouth before spitting back into clogged drain.
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:17 PM
Response to Original message
48. Always end each response to a Law Enforcement Officer's question with
you filthy stinking pig!
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:18 PM
Response to Original message
49. DS1 gives good advice, meant to enhance your life
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qnr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:20 PM
Response to Original message
50. Remember, if you drop change on the subway tracks, always stand on the 3rd
rail with one of your feet while picking it up.
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The empressof all Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:22 PM
Response to Original message
51. Go ahead and use cornflakes to coat your fried chicken
Yup, That's the ticket.

:) :hi: :)
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Ikonoklast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:23 PM
Response to Original message
52. Sell all your worldly possessions
borrow as much money as you can, max out the cash advances of your credit cards, and give it to Pat Robertson.
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zbdent Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 12:24 PM
Response to Original message
53. Whiz on the electric fence
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:42 PM
Response to Original message
55. Save time. Butter your toast before you put it in the toaster.
Never mind the flames, that just adds a certain dietary aid and some cajun flavour.
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #55
56. To really save time... Toast it up in your morning bath.
;)
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GoddessOfGuinness Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
57. To end a long drought...
leave your car windows rolled down.

This works even better if you leave your keys in the ignition too.
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Democracy White Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:51 PM
Response to Original message
58. Go downtown and flash everybody
It's really fun and you'll get lots of girls (or boys).

Dee
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Democracy White Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:52 PM
Response to Original message
59. Pee on the street
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PittPoliSci Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
60. if you find yourself short on saline...
just spit in your hand and put some salt in it and put that in your eye.
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Misunderestimator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
61. Never, ever use condoms...
And don't ever wear clothes to the grocery store...

Oh, and one more piece of advice... Always post compromising pictures of yourself on the internet.

:) :hi:
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #61
71. I did the last one
:cry:

NEVER AGAIN
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Shell Beau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
62. Go swimming in a terrible thunderstorm with something made of metal
somewhere on your body! :evilgrin:
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 01:54 PM
Response to Original message
63. If you're ever out of Chorizo, use Kielbasa...
...they're essentially the same thing.
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:05 PM
Response to Reply #63
64. Kielbasa makes everything taste better
even ice cream.
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:08 PM
Response to Reply #64
65. Kielbasa? Cream?
I got one word for you. Freud.
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tarkus Donating Member (780 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
66. Why not move to the southeast? It is cheaper and the people are great! NM
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:16 PM
Response to Original message
67. Cook bacon nakkid.
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:22 PM
Response to Reply #67
68. speaking from experience
I think you win.

(yooooooooooowza!)
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #68
72. It's a rite of passage, grasshopper. n/t
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caty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:23 PM
Response to Original message
69. Always trust your
nearest Republican.
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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:30 PM
Response to Original message
70. Loan someone some money.
Hey, I killed two threads with one post...well, hopefully not KILLED them. :)
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Pacifist Patriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-21-05 02:31 PM
Response to Original message
73. Go to Disneyworld in August.
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