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I had searched on my own for years, with no success. Finally, I worked the system (in Virginia, if you petition the courts to open the records, the agency has to locate the birth parents to seek their permission) and reconnected with my birth mother right before I turned 40. My birth father denied everything, so that was the end of that. I have a great relationship with Joyce. My daughters have another grandmother. And the rest of the family welcomed me like a long-lost member of the family (which I was). We visit each other every other year or so (PA to MN) and stay in touch quite a lot. The key to a successful reunion is the expectations of the people involved. If the search is done out of trying to fill a void or need, it has a greater chance of turning out badly. If it is done to add something, the chances of success are better. Like everything involving humans, it depends on the people. To others searching or thinking about it... What do you want to get out of the reunion? If you honestly answer that question, it will go a long way in telling you whether to pursue it. If you do search, there are many resources out there. And, as I learned, try the direct method first. Good luck to all who are in this situation. It is sometimes difficult, but can be a positive thing.
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