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These are the laws of the natural universe

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ElsewheresDaughter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 09:46 PM
Original message
These are the laws of the natural universe

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)

Bath Theorum: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last

Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
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Clintmax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
1. ROFL!
:rofl: Those are all SO ENTIRELY true! Holey Moly I was reading each one going; "Yep!" "Yep!" "Yep!"
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Maestro Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 10:07 PM
Response to Original message
2. Yet another ROFL
:rofl:
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chknltl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 10:09 PM
Response to Original message
3. make room for one more....
...:rofl:
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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 10:13 PM
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4. Good ones
:rofl:
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baldguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Sep-05-05 10:14 PM
Response to Original message
5. "Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about."
And so, we find the source of the GOP party platform.
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