Bowels Won't Move!

Back when George W. Bush was attempting to...uhhh...secure the land for the Ballpark at Arlington, the last man standing was named John Bowels. Bush's lawyers went to try to talk some sense into him.

"Bowels won't move! This has been my home and my father's home and his father's before him. I won't move! I just won't!"

The lawyers told him to get a lawyer because they were gonna take him to court.

Bowels went to town and found a professional building. In it was a doctor's office and a lawyer's office and he went in the wrong door...screaming "Bowels Won't Move!" at the top of his lungs. They gave him a pill and told him to come back tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes. "Bowels still won't move!" They gave him another pill.

Tomorrow comes. "Fucking lawyers for that little shithead. Bowels still won't move!" They gave him a different pill.

The next day came. "Bowels move!" The nurse stood up and asked 'really? That's great!' "Well...no it's not. My house is so full of shit, I HAD to move."

:thumbsup:

One I did get was the little girl who came in the house with a quarter. When her mother asked her where she got it, she replied, "Joey gave me a quarter to stand on my head." "You silly girl," her mother said. "He just wanted to see your panties!" "I know, mommy," said the girl. "But I fooled him. I'm not wearing any!"