Happy Holidays, my shiny metal ass.

I've always felt like a big freak for not feeling warm and fuzzy around this time of year.

There is a huge age gap between me and most of my family (my sister is 17 yrs older than me and most of the extended family like cousins and whatnot are around her age). At every family gathering I pretty much sit there quietly while they all reminisce about how great and fun it was in the old neighborhood (which my mom moved away from when she was preggers with me), talk about all these funny, cool people I don't know or who died before I was born, etc.

It doesn't help that I am totally the black sheep of my family. They know nothing about my life because my lifestyle would make them flip their shit (religion, sexuality, hobbies, etc.). I don't share anything in common with them whatsoever, and they always feel like an interloper. The holidays just serve as a painful reminder of how disconnected I feel from the rest of my family. All the ads on TV with the smiling happy people putting presents in stockings, sappy movies about togetherness...people talking about how great this time of year is because they just love being with their families.

I just feel like hiding under a rock until Jan 2. Am I alone?

:hug:

:rofl:

I love your wit!!

:hug:

NOW GIMMIE YER MONEY!

;)

disconnected from family is hard. I hope you can find joy with your friends though!

:hug:

friends we can choose, families we can't.

The one you're born into, and the one you find for yourself. Take comfort in the people you love, whether they're related to you by blood or just close friends.

I'm lucky, I don't have very many friends but the ones I do have I'm pretty close to, and I have them to thank for my sanity. Most of us come from screwed up families and probably would have killed ourselves a long time ago had we not found each other. Thank the FSM for the internets, is all I can say.

thread...then you gave me the chills. For most of my life I have felt much the same way. I've led it a bit differently than my family, and was always the baby...never a "part of things" in my mind.

I don't blame you. You need to do whatever it takes to get you through. But remember, In my mind (me, just a run of the mill message board poster) their loss is my gain. :hi: :hug:

I'm a Futurama fan too. :silly:

And thanks. :hug: If it wasn't for the internets I'd probably go even crazier than I already am.

our society. I agree with the poster who mentioned the families we make for ourselves. Society is so screwed up these days I wonder if I'll ever feel normal again. you and me both on the internets thing.

brothers or sister. I have one cousin I really like, so I made my own family.

I haven't spent a holiday with my blood family in years.

the holidays would have driven me insane long ago. My mom's family is really large with lots of little kids. Even when I was younger I couldn't stand little kids running everywhere and I'd hide in a bedroom somewhere. I was raised Jewish, but my mom's family was not, so there wasn't any big religious goings on. My mom's side also know that I'm Pagan, and they're pretty good with it... except my uncle's second wife, she'd light me on fire if she knew.

My father's side, though, I never told and I don't intend to, which of course meant that I was stuck sitting through high holy day services in the fall. That was hell.

My mom only knows I'm Pagan thanks to her discovering some of my books in HS and flipping out. She went on several purges of my bedroom until I finally wrote her a letter explaining how hurtful her behavior was, and she actually left me alone after that. Stopped making me go to church and everything.

Now it's just an open secret that no one discusses. I think they've given up on me, honestly.

One second I'm gloriously happy, the next I'm totally pissed off at the world. Funny how it all works.

xmas, easter, thanxgivin, labor day, superbowl sunday, etc. the closest aged relative is 5 years younger... but acts like 10 years younger. most are 8-15 years older or younger than i am. and outside of that they either live the suburbia yuppie lifestyle, or they are the neices and nephews of the disney channel, suburban hell lifestyle. sweet people, they have some mildly interesting stories, but for the most part we don't click. skiing and sports talk is the most daring thing about them.

that and all holidays means either a) football for the men or b) disney shlock for the children or (rarely) c) FPS for the spastic gamer recluse, of which i was one, but hate FPS. music during the holidays is required to be "inoffensive", muzak shit. food is the only thing worth bothering about the holidays, and even then most of the food gets sickeningly rich after a few bites and then you're stuck with it for the rest of the day... because that feast is for lunch, dinner, and snack. you are required to be present and "celebrate" with people i care about, sorta, but have no real interest to talk to.

yeah, the holidays suck. i look forward to living outside the country and getting the chance to ignore the holidays. ever since i've learned to ignore christmas and not worry about buying gifts, it's been a far more pleasant time. i buy gifts for others when i want to, not because "the children are young and family brings obligation during the holidays" bullshit.

i found that partying at clubs and concerts blow around the holidays. everyone wants to get all their partying out in one night and thus act like asses. and it gets so crowded, too. and the bastards ignore any theme nights. a drunk, horny, desperate mob wanting to grind to the latest top 10 tune they've been replaying on the radio to death and beyond, while muscling out the regulars and harassing the dj... equals a very shitty night. so i've learned to not party on or too near the holidays, too. there's really no respite from the annoyance except brewing a cup of tea and chilling in your room until the whole horrible thing goes away.

so yeah, chalk me up as not a fan of the holidays. season of gathering with loved ones and sharing the love with neighbors my ass. get the hell away from me -- and your hellspawn too, i don't like you, i don't want to know you, and i think you have shitty taste in music, art, tv, activities, and conversation, and get your lips off of my drink and get your hand off of my ass! my kingdom for a strong sedative...

The families you see on TV are nothing like real life. I really believe every family is disfunctional in some way or another. My family is ok (somewhat disfunctional too), it's my hubby's that irritate the hell out of me. Sometimes my own do too. Remember you can pick your friends. I do hope you find some kind of satisfaction this holiday season, even if it has nothing to do with your family situation whatsoever.