Am I a bad person? (there's a point - not a ploy for attention)

bertha katzenengel

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:17 AM
Original message

Am I a bad person? (there's a point - not a ploy for attention)

No "you're a great person Bertha and we love you" stuff here, please, that's not my point.

My point: I'm not a bad person for wanting not to spend time with a particular person - am I? I've written several times about this poisonous person at work and my attempts to be friendly with her because I truly believe everyone is redeemable. Also because I kinda believe in karma. But I'm beginning to think that those beliefs don't mean I have to do the "redeeming."

Thoughts?

Because I don't think I can stand anymore of the bigoted, racist, "but I don't mean it in a BAD way, it's just a FACT!" blather. :eyes:

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Nicholas D Wolfwood

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:18 AM
Response to Original message

1. If you don't like someone, you don't like someone.

There's nothing in that that makes you a bad person at all.

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bertha katzenengel

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:23 AM
Response to Reply #1

2. good!

that's all i needed, one confirmation. ty, Vash. :hi:

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Nicholas D Wolfwood

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:26 AM
Response to Reply #2

4. That's what I'm here for!

:hug:

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bertha katzenengel

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:59 AM
Response to Reply #4

10. i got a hug from Vash the Stampede!

:hug:

(Your name always puts me in mind of Sonic the Hedgehog.)

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progmom

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:25 AM
Response to Original message

3. you're a great person Bertha and we love you

seriously though...i don't think that makes you a bad person. that kind of person can feel poisonous, and there isn't a whole lot you can do about her but stay out of her way. :hug:

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MsAnthropy

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:27 AM
Response to Original message

5. You have to consider your own health

both mental and physical. Some people are just toxic.

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caty

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:28 AM
Response to Original message

6. You have a moral obligation

to yourself to protect your physical, mental, and emotional health. Without these, you can't be of any help to yourself or others. If someone is poison in your life, stay away from them. This doesn't mean you have to be rude to this person---just have as little to do with them as possible. No---you are not a bad person. You are someone with feelings that must be protected.

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tjwmason

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:37 AM
Response to Original message

7. There are many people that I don't like.

There are a few people that I dislike. There is nobody that I genuinely hate.

I would say that as long as you don't hate her (e.g., actually wish her ill-will) then by no stretch of the imagination can you be called bad. We all along with different types of folk - and if she is a bigot, then her attitudes are bound to irritate a good person (such as yourself).

In cases such as this - I tend simply to avoid the person. Being around them is likely to raise my hackles, and then I will probably start to wish them ill (for a short while).

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RevCheesehead

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:39 AM
Response to Original message

8. That's self-preservation, dear.

Sounds to me that you have a healthy set of boundaries. He or she may be redeemable, but you don't have to be their Messiah. ;)

Oh, and when the bigoted stuff is said, along with "I don't mean it in a bad way," then ask them just what they DO mean. Put it back on them, and let them squirm a while.

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Deep13

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Tue Dec-06-05 09:41 AM
Response to Original message

9. I don't like everyone. I don't hang around with people I don't like.

Life is too short to waste on assholes.

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