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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-18-05 08:43 PM
Original message
I want to get married for political purposes:
I need a spouse who can cook, clean, take care of children, make intelligent small talk as well as look good but not better then me.

Do I have any takers?

(Preferably male since currently same sex marriage is outlawed in my state)

}(
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Midnight Rambler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-19-05 12:11 AM
Response to Original message
1. Right here
I can cook some things, mostly on the grill. I can clean well enough, and I can distract children long enough for you to have a stiff drink and some precious moments of calm. My small talk is quite intelligent, and I can be taught many things as well. Also, I am in my early twenties and reasonably good looking (or so I have been told), so just a little time in the gym and I could be an excellent trophy husband.

How's that?
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 03:48 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. You win. Is your last name decent?
Mine is Rogers.
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Midnight Rambler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 01:06 PM
Response to Reply #2
24. It's better than decent. It's Spanish.
Means "eagle," and is just a couple letters away from being the exact same surname as a certain teen pop star who likes to pose topless on her album covers.
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 01:45 AM
Response to Reply #24
26. Linda Ronstadt?
Okay that was lame but I have no idea who you are talking about.
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Midnight Rambler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 02:31 PM
Response to Reply #26
29. Christina Aguilera
My last name is Aguilar
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:13 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. At least you are not a stinky pop princess!
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Midnight Rambler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:30 PM
Response to Reply #30
32. So when and where is the ceremony?
And do I have to wear a tux?
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:47 PM
Response to Reply #32
34. You would need to get used to wearing tuxes if I am a popular
politician.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 03:50 AM
Response to Original message
3. One of DU's finest men is accepting applications!
And he truly _is_ one of DU's finest. :thumbsup:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x4459288
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 03:56 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. But he has been snapped up already!
Or something.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 03:56 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. Oooooooooooo, no, I don't think so!
He thanked me for kicking his thread this morning, so I think he's still available. :thumbsup:
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:08 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. ah he is a flirt then?
:o
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:10 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. Oh, no, I wouldn't say so.
He does have a thing about yaks, though. :thumbsup:
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:21 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. But does he have facial hair?
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:22 AM
Response to Reply #8
9. Yes, as I recall, he has a moustache.
:thumbsup:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:26 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. It tickles
Tickles my Elmo
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:29 AM
Response to Reply #11
12. That's between you and Crazy.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:40 AM
Response to Reply #12
21. You're right, it DID come between us
But I still love your cartoon. :D
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:31 AM
Response to Reply #9
14. Drat...deal breaker
I do not like facial hair. :cry:
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:34 AM
Response to Reply #14
16. Rats.
I was hoping for a finder's fee. :rofl:
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:37 AM
Response to Reply #16
17. You can have a cookie though.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:38 AM
Response to Reply #17
18. Why, thank you!
:hi:
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:39 AM
Response to Reply #18
20. Welcome...Cookies are good.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:26 AM
Response to Original message
10. And now I'm going to come over here and do it...
Mock

Mock

Mock

:P
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:30 AM
Response to Reply #10
13. You have to be the lover in the bushes then.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:32 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. Okay
Talked me into it. :-)
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:38 AM
Response to Reply #15
19. My husband's lover though.
Not mine since I have to stay focused.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:43 AM
Response to Reply #19
22. Um
:rofl:

Does he have facial hair?

:o

Oh is that the time I must be going well it's been nice talking with you but I must be off now bye-bye
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 04:49 AM
Response to Reply #22
23. Wimp!
And not if I was married to him.

Ick.
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-20-05 01:12 PM
Response to Original message
25. If this were GD, I'd take this as sarcasm and kick your ass.
;)

:hi:
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 01:46 AM
Response to Reply #25
27. If this were GD? What does GD mean?
And that was mean...can a woman not do as a man and marry for political fortune?
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 10:43 AM
Response to Reply #27
28. the General Discussion forum
Sure a woman can marry for political fortune. Sad when anyone does it, IMO.

I think our points are crossing, though.
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:14 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. Hmmm...did you have a bad day? Because this is suppose
to be a very silly post that makes people laugh.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:41 PM
Response to Original message
33. I can do all that... but I'm already married
Edited on Wed Dec-21-05 08:42 PM by NewJeffCT
Well, I'm not a great cook... but, I'm great with housework. I even asked for a good quality vacuum cleaner for my main XMas present.
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 08:53 PM
Response to Reply #33
35. Yes but that marriage is not good. :(
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-21-05 10:31 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. i know, and i'm happily married, too
but, looking back that young doctor in training I dated a few times that was looking for a potential house husband looks pretty good at times.
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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-22-05 05:47 AM
Response to Reply #36
37. sounds fun
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