Have you ever caught yourself,...lying to yourself?

I have,...today.

I've told everyone I know and love that, spending my birthday alone is no big deal since I prefer "skipping" birthdays at this time in my life anyway.

I lied to them,...AFTER I lied to myself.

I hate being alone, today. ;(

I know, I know,...I'm being a weak-assed, whiner and self-indulgent, too. ;(

Oh, well. I still hate being alone, today,...for better or worse.

You are NOT alone. Happy Birthday! :hug:

,...cyber hug. BACKATCHA' :hug:

just with you. You are not alone.

,...ever, alone.

Thank you for giving a few moments of your life,...for mine.

Some times we just need to be alone. Its ok. Its not your last birthday.

and on my birthday.

I found ways to celebrate being alone those days. I did things I would not have done otherwise. I'm not talking about a big deal. I tried a tough recipe. I painted something.

It was before the Internet. We can still find ways to enjoy the alone time.

Read a book without interruption
Go to a movie and see whatever i want
etc. etc.

It is tough on your birthday, but you could always call your friends and say you changed your mind.

,...but, ABHOR loneliness.

Maybe, I am withdrawing from the wonderful human closeness with which I was blessed past weekend with my son, my family, my beau, my friends. Maybe, I just want that closeness to continue.

I think I'll just hold on to that, closeness.

from your DU family. You're never alone here!

Happy Birthday, Just Me!

:party: :toast:

You are not alone!

you have to do something to make some situations better -- sometimes you don't know it at the time...''yeah, yeah sure i'm fine''

''wait no i'm not -- i'm fucked.''

anyway you certainly have friends here -- happy birthday!

I mean Yes.

I mean No.

I mean Yes.

I mean No.

I mean....

Doublethink is easy. It's the truth that's hard.

It's a, "I don't really need you for my life to be meaningful. Uh, well,...okay, I really DO need you,...to actually be valuable."

I am truly nothing without others. As a "stand alone" life, I have no value,...I just don't. IMHO.

I was left alone on Christmas, which I shouldn't really mind since we're Jewish. I lied. I minded. I called all my relatives and heard about how my nephews have grown up. That helped a lot.

,...and apparently sensed my "loneliness", keeping me chatting for a whole hour about our concern for others' well-being.

I shouldn't mind being by myself when my Mom calls, like that.

I guess it's the physical presence I miss, I need. I confess that I am big on pats and embraces.

Just don't go all Capricorn and indulge in the My Birthday Sucks routine. You're right. It's 2 days after Christmas and it DOES suck--y'all got shorthchanged on the timing.

This is a powerful time for projecting and planning what your next year will bring. You are very tenacious and on-purpose, so think big, then make it so. Remember that Cap is the only sign who gets younger as he ages...

What will you do/get/be next year?

I read your post, therefore, you are not alone. :-) Shall I be like a nosy aunt or a relative?
How old are you?
Are you going to wear THAT?
Please shut up about politics!
Get off the computer and make my dinner.


LOL - Sometimes being alone has it's advantages.

and stop doing that! You have to fight for the right to party!

Make (or buy) some coffee cake, brew some fresh coffee, and invite some friends and neighbors over. Small filled cookies help make it festive ... and low-key.

Oh... wear a party hat. :party: Happy Birthday!

,...(mostly) Norwegian!!! Was that on purpose or instinctive?

BTW I am munching on lefse, right now,...along with some corona extra *LOL*!!!

I sure could enjoy some rulle polse right now! (Yum!)

Did you use instant, mashed, or grated potatoes in your lefse? :evilgrin:

,...just for me (being the last of a generation that engaged in the artistic act of "rosemauling"). She also did those deep-fried rosette thingys that I can't remember the names for,...lightly covered with powered sugar. What are those called? Bugs the fuck outta' me that I can't remember!!!

My mother's parents both immigrated from Norway around 1917. I grew up with that side of my family, which included my grandaunt and granduncle (mother's uncle) who also immigrated around that time. My grandaunt was a cook in the king's kitchens before she married my granduncle. She was an AWESOME cook -- and set out a SUPER smorgasbord on those Sundays when they had friends (Sons of Norway) over ... or for family celebrations. I loved staying with them in the country when I was a kid. I ate like a king. Literally. She had a couple of differently patterned rosette irons, but only made them for special occasions ... like Christmas. My cousins and I could eat them faster than she could make them. (Of course!)

My FAVORITE!!!! I called my Mom to make sure they are called, "rosettes". *LOL*

I took/take on the designated rosemauling artist.

My Mom volunteers to save what's left of the sweetest of Norwegian affections.

My mother's family immigrated from Norway at the turn of the century, too. They worked to their death for a better future for their kids.

:grouphug:

And, I am sooooo grateful to be comfortable enough,...to feel free enough,...to share my inner most feelings, right here.

:grouphug:

I am grateful.

Tune into Mike Malloy...

http://www.airamericaradio.com/

Join in with fellow truthseekers!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x5695926



You are not alone!:party: :toast: :party:

or changing your mind about some future prediction you made in the past? If I tell somebody three days ago that I am okay with being alone on my birthday, it may turn out when my birthday gets here that I was wrong. Sometimes too, I am overly optimistic in my predictions. I over-estimate my own speed, energy, and strength. That is not the same as lying. My ego deludes me, but I need that delusion to keep carrying on instead of breaking down.

Otherwise I try to avoid dishonesty.

Yes. I confess that my own ego defies me,...even though my ego is about serving others rather than self-service,...it is still an ego.

My ego needs others *LOL*.

What else can I say? :shrug:

I'm into that skipping birthday idea myself. May I be one of many to wish you health and happiness for your entire new year of your birthday to come, and it doesn't necessarily have to start today.
Hugs from another DUer who appreciates you tremendously! :hug:

,...skipping birthdays and galloping towards these :hug:

My birthday wish, today, is to give you a real human embrace by my next birthday. That would be THE BEST!!!!

I'm the opposite. My family knows they'd by god better not skip my birthday, no matter how old I get. :evilgrin:

But yeah, I've tried to convince myself other things didn't bother me when they did.

So plan an extra special weekend and buy yourself a cake and just take it to whatever party you're going to Saturday night.

And, Happy Birthday!!

,...that I intend to BE SEXY at the New Year party. I haven't been "sexy" for twenty years!!!! He thinks I'm sexy NOW *LOL*!!!

Imagine what he'll think when I try!!! :woohoo:

I wish all this for you, but since this is a cyber deal please do the following for me....

Make your favorite beverage and snack, whether it be an Earl Grey tea with a scone and orange marmalade or a frozen Margarita with nachos and cheese.

Draw a steaming hot bath, adding bubble bath, moisturizers, and a bath perfume.

Turn on your sound system and play the most heartbreaking or heartwarming album, tape, or cd of your youth-got it-an old one you haven't listened to in years...

Drop your fresh undies and a terry robe on a radiator or heating vent in the bathroom, and GET DOWN....

You are one of us, a friend,and precious here. Enjoy your special evening with your friends...Mazeltov

Every scent-provoking candle lighted for ambiance!!! YUM!!! I have plumeria and pears and spice and "strawberry shortcake" in my space (I indulge most in the pear --- my fave).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you-

You gave yourself a wonderful gift today- you fought against the desire to pretend you don't matter- that you don't count, or have feelings and desires.

THAT, is not weak assed, whining or self-indulgent. That is being HONEST- even when it hurts, and is humbling- and it will come back to feed you in the end- not bite you.

Wish i could bake you a cake, and put some ballons around your computer-

Thanks for giving me cause to celebrate today- the day "Just Me" came into the world-
we are all necessiary, valuable peices of each other- and i rejoice in YOU-

wishing you joy, peace and happy surprises.
blu

,...:hug:

I embrace your expression filled with so much Love.

Thank you. :hug:

I love you, back!!!

here on DU I was venting to Other Mr. Sui and I said "I don't care if they call me names", when I realized how absurd that was.

Of COURSE I care. That's why I occasionally slaughter one of the sheep.

I think sometimes we have an idea of what we'd like to be and we confuse that with who we are. Believing we're not feeling hurt or lonely is a nice fantasy if it were true, but it's better to admit it and deal with it positively than disconnect who you are from who you want to be.

Happy Birthday!!!! Now go out and say hi to world and tell them to wish you a happy birthday. I'll bet you meet someone you like today.

If the mountain doesn't go to mohammad, mohammad must go to the mountain!

I am not compelled to beat people up when they accidently step on my feelings. Even at my best, I've somehow stepped upon others' sensitivities. It's all about a commitment to healing, in spite of our best intentions gone awry.

When someone steps ON my feelings, I just say "ouch", that hurts. Some defend their expression, and I ask, "for whom". Some explain/rationalize, and I say, "for what". Some apolgize and I,....hug with every inch of my being.

We are none of us right, ever, except with eachother.

I hope you dirnk alcohol or smoke pot, some would call it escapism but I know what its like to spend b-days and holidays alone. It sucks and no amount of coddling over how strong and independent one is really helps. At the same time never mistake a want for a need. Besides you have your crazy ass whacked out DU family to flame up with!

Peace to you Just Me.


edited to add:

I lie to myself everytime I uh ermmm uhmmm induce please in my nether regions. Don't we all? (lie to ourselves?)

to have a birthday anyway. Sorry ...so close to Christmas. Have a good day. Have a drink, read a good book, write a poem, take a walk.
:toast: :toast: :toast:

Though surrounded by people, places, and things..we are born alone, we die alone, and the greater part of our lives we live alone...inside ourselves with our thoughts, fears, desires, and all that stuff in the attic. The years pass and we outgrow pieces of ourself....but rather than being discarded, they become a part of, and as we take the next step forward, they are right there with us. We are...the sum of all our parts...and all those shades of personality we have been. Take a peek back at some moments in time....and marvel at who you've been and the distance you've traveled.

happy birthday to you
happy birthday to just me
happy birthday to you

your special day. go out and treat yourself, adn see what comes your way. quit being alone

Your DU family is with you -

Just remember that you are cared for by all of your DU friends. :hug:

My niece's birthday was last Saturday, my brother's birthday was yesterday, my son's birthday is this Saturday and mine is a week from Sunday.

It IS a crappy time to have a birthday. Nevertheless, have a happy one.

:pals:

:toast: :party:

Happy Birthday

ever. :hi:

You have us :D

The biggest lie i tell myself is...don't smoke, you hate it, you don't need it...:) I have been smoke free since the 3rd of June...and i lie to myself about it, so i can keep up on NOT smoking...:) Cause in truth, god damn it, i wanna smoke!...its a pain...:(

And don't ever lie again just to save face...it's not worth it, as you can see.

Happy Birthday!

It's my birthday too! (yeah)

Really. And I think we might have done this last year.There was another birthday person. I haven't read through replies yet, maybe they have chimed in.
Happy birthday.

I really would like to be alone.
I like to contemplate. But my son and his wife don't believe it. They are here from out of state so they get their way on it and I will save quiet contemplation for another time. I tend to be peopled out by the time my birthday comes.

I should have read before I replied. Don't know if it is people who were offering to celebrate with you that you told you don't mind being alone.

Speak out! Say it's your birthday and they need to come with cake. Let them know. Throw yourself a little party. Tell people to take you to dinner. Honesty really is the best policy.

But maybe these people are far away and can't be with you? So you say that so they won't feel bad?

I like to be alone, but I like attention. Cards and gifts and calls where they sing to me. At the bank I told them it was my birthday and I wanted candy.Got it.

I had junk being hauled and I told them it was my birthday and I wanted a discount. Got it.

I was working outside for a while, came in and told my son something was wrong, people were driving by and not stopping to say happy birthday and give me gifts. So what if they were strangers.

And it is not to late. Birthdays are 3 days. The first day is the last day of the old age. Then the transition day. Then the first day of the new age.

And yes, sometimes I do lie as you say you are, it's not really to yourself. You know what you feel. But sometimes if something hurts me I don't say that, not when it is already done. It is hard to show my weak spots to others.

On the other hand if saying something can change it, it is easier to speak up.

Anyway...HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you (and me)
Come over and have some cake.

:hug:

In celebration of our and others' lives, let us take in the good, breathe out the bad.

:hug:

I told everyone I was happy to have Christmas with just me and the kids this year. I believed it for a little while, until the big day came around and it kinda sucked. :(

,...without family. ;( Hard as I tried to create that environment, I just couldn't do it,...without the rest of them, those people who ARE "Christmas" by their very existence, for better or worse.