Explaining what a lawyer does, to a three-year-old

"Why are you happy, Stacie?"
"I'm happy because I got into law school."
"What's law school?"
"It's grown-up school where people learn how to be lawyers."
"What's a lawyer?"
Hm. "Well, you know how you have rules at your pre-school?" (Nods.) "What are some of the rules there?"
"Ummm....no hitting."
"Good. Well, grown-ups have rules too -- they're called 'laws.' Sometimes, people don't understand the laws, so lawyers help them. Or, people break the laws, and lawyers need to help them talk to a judge to find out what kind of punishment they should get." (I left out the part about how it's 3 am and they're doing yet another night of doc review with an 8 am deadline because they've chosen the big firm with the hefty paycheck to pay down their $120,000 in loans.)
"Oh." (Pauses.) "Can I be a princess when I grow up? I like that better than lawyer school."

I've never worked in a job that took more than one sentence to explain to a child: "I work at a camp in the summer." "I work at a clothes store." "I teach big kids how to read and write." "I write a magazine." This should be interesting.

When I became a therapist, I had to explain what it meant to a friend's child. Not easy, because I don't fix brains (neurologists do that), I don't fix hearts (cardiologists do that), I don't fix feelings (the client does, or not, that), I don't help people think better.... Pretty much everything came out sounding either slightly fascist or slightly woo-woo.

that seems to work. :hi:

I just say, I work with numbers.

Actually, I have to do that with a large percentage of the adult population. :P

:scared:

She was hungry, and six is just being a big fraidy-cat!

see a difference is small and then toss out a dsimissive "well, that isn't statistically significant."

There's a lot of inmueracy in this country, but ignorance of statistics is probably the one that saddens and annoys me most.

(END THREADJACKING)

Try telling them you are an "industrial hygienist" if you really wanna see a blank stare.

And I have a good idea of what they do (I call on a few for articles), but you're right -- I couldn't explain that one to a kid.

eyesroll and eyepaddle know CIHs? ;)

I usually just tell people "workplace safety." Or mention that I am getting a master's in "how not to fall into a conveyor belt." I wouldn't use that last one on a kid though!

2 data points (last year and this year).

2 years does not a trend make. :eyes:

I like statistics.

There, I said it.

It was my favorite part of the math I've had to take over the years. I do fairly well with the stats-stuff, but it's the calculus you'd need to really go places with stats that always tripped me up. Oh well, I'll let you folks work out the formulas and then I'll apply them as needed! B-)

Heck, I'll humor you: do you think we could safely say that the American spectrum of political discourse is log normally distributed (I'm thinking in terms of difference between the mean and the mode!) ;)

:7

:thumbsup:

:rofl:

I forgot to add "Then send her a bill for the dry cleaning".