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I never thought I'D do this, but... my cat died.

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Pale Blue Dot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:07 PM
Original message
I never thought I'D do this, but... my cat died.
Aurora was a 1st Christmas present to my new (now ex) wife. I chose her because she was the only cat to come over to me at the SPCA when I went to look. On the way home she got out of the box I had brought to hold her, and she spent the rest of the car ride on my lap, purring. My ex loved her instantly, and so did I.

Within a few days of first getting her, she got very, very sick. I remember vividly the image of her lying under the Christmas tree, pine needles sticking to all of the mucus on her face. We thought she was going to die right then. Miraculously, our vet pumped her full of fluids and she got completely better. She would live another 13 years, in fact, she outlived the marriage.

She took a turn for the worse a couple of weeks ago, and last week, while visiting my son for his birthday, I said goodbye to her. I could tell the end was coming.

My ex has been crying for 3 days. Last night, while we talked on the phone, she said "You don't realize what you've got until it's gone", and while we were talking about Aurora, I feel almost positive she was also talking about me. Rather than feeling the rush of triumph that I always assumed would accompany any admission that she made a mistake, I just felt sad, and sorry for her. I have moved on, I'm very happy where I am now, and I take no pleasure in seeing someone I still care about suffer. I would appreciate any good vibes you can send my ex-wife, so that she can find someone or something to fill the void in her life.

Goodbye Aurora. You were a good kitty. Even if you never let us cut your nails.
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YellowRubberDuckie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:13 PM
Response to Original message
1. You're such a good guy, Finnfan...
You could be vindictive and hateful, but you're not. You're sweet and caring about a person who completely broke your heart. I respect that. I'm glad you're happy, but I'm terribly sorry about the cat. Good vibes going to all of you. :hug:
Duckie
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Pale Blue Dot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:17 PM
Response to Reply #1
6. It wasn't that she broke my heart.
We just fell out of love with each other. I think that by the time it ended, she saw everything as my fault, which of course it never is. I think she's waking up to the fact that I'm actually a really good guy, and she's seeing her own role in our demise for the first time.

I had actually hoped she would have found someone by now, but sadly, she hasn't been on a single date yet. That's breaking my heart, because despite her flaws, she doesn't deserve to be alone.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:13 PM
Response to Original message
2. I'm sorry, Finnfan.
It's so hard to lose a beloved pet.
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graywarrior Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:16 PM
Response to Original message
3. So sorry.
Kitty deaths make me cry.
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AirmensMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:16 PM
Response to Original message
4. Sorry, Finnfan.
Sending good vibes. :hug:
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:16 PM
Response to Original message
5. ahh finnfan...sorry about your cat
as for your ex-wife...hope she finds someone half as lovely as the one you have found!
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Pale Blue Dot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:18 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. I don't think that's possible.
:D Thanks, lionesspriyanka.
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:18 PM
Response to Original message
8. I'm sorry for you and your ex.
:cry: :hug: :pals:
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:22 PM
Response to Original message
9. I'm sorry you and your ex lost your beloved cat.
And I'm sorry your ex is still alone. I will send her good thoughts (and you as well). You are a good and decent man, FinnFan, and a very caring soul. :hug:
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Darth_Kitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:29 PM
Response to Original message
10. I am sorry.
:hug:
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peacefreak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:34 PM
Response to Original message
11. You are a gentle man with kindness & compassion.
I am sorry you lost your feline love. My heart goes out to Mrs ExFinnFan. I am glad that your heart is big enough to hold such tender feelings for all the special people in your life.
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Misunderestimator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:38 PM
Response to Original message
12. That is so similar to what I experienced with my ex, Linda.
Edited on Tue Mar-21-06 08:43 PM by Misunderestimator
She had Spike when we met, but I grew very close to that cat. Nine months after Linda and I broke up, Spike, who had had one of her hind legs amputated a year before to try to prevent the cancer that was diagnosed there took a turn for the worse and we had to put her to sleep. I went with her to the vet and later that day we buried her. At that point Linda told me that she felt she had made a mistake, but I had already moved on too, and it was too late. I too felt no triumph, although I had deeply grieved our relationship ending for all those months after our seven years together. I felt only sadness and sorrow.

Sending your ex good vibes, as I send mine whenever I think about her. Rest in peace Aurora... and Spike. :hug:
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:41 PM
Response to Original message
13. Awwww *hugs* I hope your wishes for the ex come true
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jus_the_facts Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:43 PM
Response to Original message
14. Ya'll got it....
....my sympathy and good vibes!! :hug: :loveaya:
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:50 PM
Response to Original message
15. I'm so sorry
for the loss of your pet. :hug:

But you sound as if you're in a very good place.
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ET Awful Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:52 PM
Response to Original message
16. RIP Aurora.
:(.

Good vibes on the way to your ex too. :(
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flamingyouth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 09:46 PM
Response to Original message
17. Aw, I'm sorry.
That sucks. :(
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no name no slogan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 09:48 PM
Response to Original message
18. Sorry to hear about your loss
I got my two cats from my ex's niece, who raised them by hand from babies to 10 weeks old. They've been with me through a hell of a lot, including the dissolution of my marriage.

Sending some good vibes to you and your ex. :hug:
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