My dad hasn't been to a doctor in TWELVE YEARS...

and nothing i say convinces him that he needs to go
I am so freaking worried about him its starting to give me heartburn and puts my stomach in knots

everyone in my family that i can think of has died from some form of cancer and he smoked for over 30 years .. he finally quit but still over 30 years...
and the cancer with my mom i would have thought would have woken him up but i don't know..
he is deathly afraid of doctors i guess...
ok i take that back...
he went to the doctor about 5 years ago... for hemorrhoids then got a staph infection and almost died from that..
that didn't help either...
he didn't go back for the follow up...
but still he never had a full body check up in over 12 years...
please anyone have any ideas??

So don't feel too bad.

you probably won't convince him. My mother was the same way - she didn't go to the doctor for 20 years, then she hurt her back and started seeing a doctor. In the process of treating her pinched nerve, the doctor discovered that she is diabetic and also found some heart problems, for which she has had surgery. Now she sees all kinds of doctors all the time. I really don't think that her current problems could have been avoided if she had gone earlier to regular checkups. As far as cancer goes, your dad probably is afraid to find out. Sorry I can't help more, but then going to see a doctor won't guarantee that you'll be healthy.

years.. plus lately ive had a "bad feeling" that i cant shake..
don't know really..
just a daughters vibe i guess

present him with a homemade gift certificate to provide him with a free opportunity to do a favorite thing like a fishing weekend or tickets to a ball game PROVIDED he gets a checkup - make it fun.

:crazy: Some men think that's a bad thing.

I'd rather that than the "other". :scared:

I just realized that isn't the best stated subject line. :blush:

I have no faith left in the medical profession. I know there are wonderful people out there but my experience has been, not many of them are available to me.

I'd rather die at home than be abused by doctors, insurance companies or the federal government. At least at home, no one will be rude to me or make me take a number or kill me from sheer incompetence.

Seriously, when people are phobic, the thing that has worked for me is to be supportive. Arguing or pushing just makes it worse. Just like if you push on a stretched rubber band, it will only snap back.

It's his choice, after all, isn't it? If you are supportive of that choice, maybe he'll feel good enough to take another step or maybe he won't. It is his choice.

What else do we have but our choice.

My best wishes for you both.

My mom tried for years with many doctors trying to get correctly diagnosed with her TMJ and Fibro. Many said it was in her head (mentally.) Then I have my grandfather who was misdiagnosed with double pneumonia for 3 months when he actually had congestive heart failure and when it was finally correctly figured, he died as a result 1-1/2 months later. Then I have my daughter who was constantly sick, in and out of the doctors. Many medical bills even with the insurance. What did it for me with her was the fact of having the same ear infection for 6 weeks, getting 5 different sets of antibiotics, and none of them worked. She was too old for the tubes (she was 5 at the time.) Then I met my husband who's mother is a Naturopathic Doctor. We changed diets, started taking all of the herbal supplements, and she has been the healthy little girl that she needed to be. Almost three years down the road, she has had 2 ear infections that we cleared up in 2 days instead of 5-6, a couple of small colds, pink-eye, a bout of strep throat (healed in 2 days,) and laryngitis that would have taken her out for over a week that I got cleared up in 3 days. My parents hate it because they have no faith in what we are doing and think that I will not ever take her to a medical doctor if the need arises. With my being pregnant, they freaked at the thought of my going to a Midwife. To ease their minds, I am going to the OB/GYN that I went to with my daughter.
It is a balance of faith in what you believe in and what needs to be done necessarily.

I don't go to doctors unless it is absolutely necessary. The last time I went was because I tore my cornea and that was 11 years ago.

Sure, I'm only 41 but I don't feel like I am illin', so I ain't goin'.