Weekly World News: Bush thrilled, reading successfully at 6th grade level

BUSH THRILLED TO BE READING AT 6TH GRADE LEVEL AND IT'S ABOUT TIME!



By DAVID TOLSEY

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A White House spokesperson announced President Bush is reading successfully at the sixth grade level. "The President is absolutely thrilled at his latest achievement," said Edward Thurut. "And he wants the American people to know just how far he's progressed the past year. He's been officially tested by the D.C. school board, and the results arrived at Pennsylvania Avenue earlier this morning. The President wishes to thank all those who believed in him, especially First Lady Laura, the lovely librarian who won his heart so many years ago."

While Bush supporters were celebrating the good news, several leading Democrats used the moment to paint an entirely different picture of George W. Bush.

Said DNC Deputy Chairman Clarence Slaughtery: "This man is the President of the U.S., and he's just now reading at a sixth grade level? What were the American people thinking reelecting him? "You know, I'll even go so far as to suggest that Dick Cheney takes the reading tests for him. After all, this is the guy who runs the White House anyway."

While many educators across the U.S. have applauded the President's persistence in trying to improve his reading comprehension, there's a growing concern over his mathematical aptitude as well. "It's clear the President's mathematical comprehension is also on par with a junior high school child," said Constance Souron, William and Terri University's Dean of Education. "That's ironic, considering it's our children who will be left dealing with this outlandish budget deficit he created."

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/politics/61720