Single DU men - how far would you go to meet a nice young woman?

My wife's cousin, who is not from Connecticut, was skeptical that men would travel a long distance to meet a pretty woman when I offered to set her up with some nice guys.

So, if you spoke with a woman on the phone, got along well with her, and thought she was attractive either through pictures or a webcam... how far would you go to meet her in person?

(BTW - this woman is 22/23, very pretty, a college graduate, outgoing with a good personality, and seemingly a nice person... I would guess maybe 5'3" and slim. And, she supported Kerry in the last election)

I would be asking for an email address. Life is too short to worry about a long drive. She sounds like DA BOMB!

Didn't work out.

But I'm not complaining -- I have a much better gal now. ;)

One of the smarter things I've read on DU is that if a man wants you, he'll cross the ocean, climb the mountain, slay the dragon, whatever.

If he bellyaches over stupid things like "Gee, I like her, but she's all the way in Arizona/Nepal/Antarctica"--he's just not that into her and doesn't care that much. She doesn't need those types.

That's why I don't understand people with online ads that specify they only want someone in XXXX area--as if you can force love to exist within XX miles of you. Seems lazy and short-sighted to me, if love is what you're looking for. If you're looking for someone to go out for drinks with, or a FWB situation, well, fine. But why limit your possibilities? /end rant.

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I think she'd have to be in the continental United States for starters

The most I've traveled for a girl in the last year was 400 miles though.

France/Russia/Brazil? That'd be amazing, if every American was destined to marry an American, etc.

How can you be so sure? So really, you're not looking for true love, you're looking for true love in America. I don't know, to me that's limiting. It's kind of the same thing as saying "I want to marry a man with brown hair and green eyes". Forcing love to come in a package that YOU (or anyone) decide seems just so....limiting. It would imply love is a choice...and a lot of people believe that. I dunno, I don't, necessarily.

But I can see where waiting for 1 in 6 billion would be weird.

My parents grew up 1000 miles apart, but they met in the same town. They got married after dad got a promotion and moved 500 miles away. It is almost impossible to maintain or create a relationship across those kinds of distances. I once courted a woman who was a mere fifteen miles away and the costs and difficulties even in that were phenomenal. Of course, this was before the internet and when I was without a car, as I am now.

I freely admit that I am not looking for anything as preposterous as true love, not when it is so impossible to find and so easy to manufacture. Loving and being true, to me, are things that people do (although I also found about my trip to Deutschland that you cannot make your spirit dance if it does not feel like dancing).

From my observation, there are lots of sexy, smart, amazing women who could, if she chose to, enrich my life in a billion ways. Might not be true love, or kizmet, the perfect woman for me, or unrelenting happiness ever after, but, I am here to tell you, I'd fu$%ing love to settle for that.

time, distance, and circumstance ARE constraining factors like it or not. And rolling the dice on some chick 1000(s) of miles away is pretty much the definition of "low percentage" to begin with

Show me a guy who's never been burned in a relationship and you might have someone naive enough to buy your tidy, over-romanticized version of the world, but anybody else no way.

Provably.

apparently. ;)

:loveya:

Vancouver's farther than that!

The web site that gave me that factoid lied to me? :o


:loveya:

I think it needs a good....hacking. :yoiks:

How's the weather? I think 'you-know-who' must still be around, because here's what we had last night: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=5273484&mesg_id=5275163

Maybe they've completely changed our weather patterns! :cry: Damn, I'm going to have to start a petition to keep them out of the country!

We got some relief midweek - it actually became quite cold. They are predicting 29 celcius by sunday.

I think I will go out to the electrical store on sunday afternoon and see if I can get a room cooler. :)

Sorry about screwing up your weather. :hug: ;)

but it's nice to see you practicing being Canadian even before you get here. ;-)

We're due for rain for the next week - I think we only had one sunny day last week. The south of the province is on flood alert, but as you seen in my link, we had sort of one yesterday (a flash flood).

Do they sell odd things at the grocery stores over there? By odd, I mean things like air conditioners and power tools. There are some here that you have to wade through the computer and electronic sections before you get to the food. :crazy:

At the local mini-supermarket where my mum lives you can buy refridgerators. :wtf:

My own supermarket has recently completely redesigned itself to make room for an apparel section in the middle. I am just annoyed because I still haven't learned where everything is again after the rearrangement. *grumble grumble*

If I was single and she was very pretty and we clicked on the phone, I'd definately spend at least 8 hours either driving or flying and up to 300 dollars. Maybe more. Depends on how pretty she is, and how well we got along.

If she was very Hot, and we were really clicking...I'd say anywhere I can legally travel within a day or two and up to maybe 1000 or 2000 dollars.

I'm a romantic though.

:rofl:

Darn! It changed. Wished I'd gotten a screen shot. :D

:rofl:

A guy who sees what he wants will travel as far as his wallet permits. No doubt about it?

So it depends on the state of my finances and/or favors I can call in to get transportation. :shrug:

That you addressed it to "DU Men", but mentioned that the woman was "young".

I wish you'd said "*Young* Single DU Men" or something...

I said "young" to hopefully narrow it down to guys in this woman's age bracket. I'm sure guys my age might respond to a generic thread about this, but I think as guys get older, they seem less inclined to scale the mountain, sail the ocean, slay the dragon, etc...

i'm impossible to please! :P

:hi:

he was in the US visiting from Australia. He kept travelling from Australia to see me.

This cousin sounds like a good catch, too. Seems like single men in CT would be remiss in not making a trek to meet her.

like, across the country & then across an ocean.

Any further than that, it becomes a long-distance relationship, and those are disasters waiting to happen.

Who knows? That first date might be good enough to allow a slide into home.;-)

Its called the Suicide Squeeze for a reason

I've allowed a homer or two in my day on date one.

Thats definitely the goal, but I thought we were talking swinging for the fences "behind in the count" if you will :)

I've traveled across the country to meet someone that I was interested in before. If the person is genuine, good-hearted, sincere and intelligent, then distance would not be an issue for me.

And I'm the prototypical "nice guy." That's a turn off to some women, and attractive to others. I don't have a mean temper, and am relatively easy going. I am a liberal from So Cal after all, so I'm pretty laid back.

Anyways, there's no way of knowing what possibilities exist until there is communication, so Jeff, please drop me a note if you are being serious about this offer. I just turned 40, and that seems to sometimes bother younger women in their 20's. Not sure why, I always thought that women wanted a mature, intelligent, established man.

I'm 5'5", never married, CPA/CFP, live in So Cal, and have lots of references. Would gladly travel to meet someone if there was a connection, and being liberal in thought is a definite bonus!

I really don't wanna offend you, but I doubt she's attracted to her Dad :D

I don't see where age is so important. I just turned 40, so while 18 years is a lot, it's not exactly father/daughter.

If I was some rich dude with millions of dollars, there would be plenty of young women who would date me for my money. But that's not what I'm looking for.

:D

But after an ongoing e-mail and phone exchange where it's obvious we could be at least friends, I would definitely hop on a plane to meet her.

So where does she live?

Would she be willing to fly down to Miami to meet me?

I doubt most in the US would have a problem getting a Visa to visit China. On the other hand, a 23 year old single woman in China...

but, I'm guessing she is probably a bit shy about her English...

Shanghai...

On the plus side, she's used to warm weather & big cities.

On the minus, she's in Shanghai and English is a 2nd language to her.

That raises her stock significantly

On the condition my boss approves of it.

:)

the last we exchanged posts on this, you were waiting to see if you were still in a relationship or not.

that thing.

Thanks for reminding me, I have to call her. :)

sounds like a good match to me
:hi:

she is 22 or 23, while he is 36

but, you could be right

But I like younger women. And some of them tend to like me.

that would definitely figure into the mileage calculations.

And she paid my airfare.
Just thought that I'd share that with you.

:rofl:

She sounds great, but at 45 I prefer a woman I can talk to...

RL

she's studying to get into law school

Good, she can do my divorce while we are getting to know each other...

:D

RL

so, i don't think she'd be much help!

she looks much prettier in person, however.

I was kidding but thanks for the pics.

She is very cute...

RL

when I saw her, she looked way better in person.

Amor de lejos es amor de pendejos --Mexican proverb

Do you really want a problem to resolve (who's going to move close to whom) at the very start of a relationship?

Besides, I'm a regionalist, I have trouble relating to people from places I haven't ever lived. Not saying we can't be friends, but I think I need some common geography to really fall in love.

some of the same places. I wouldn't commit to moving cross-country for someone I didn't already have that in common with, so why would I expect her to do the same?

Sorry, it's old fashioned of me, but I kind of believe in roots. You can't build true love over e-mail, I don't think. You need to share the real world together and let love grow from there.

They say that in Colombia as well.

Though I did carry on with my girlfriend for a couple of years Texas-California... But that was an open relationship and she wanted to move out here (CA) regardless of me.