Russian History

I am thinking of writing a book on Russian history. Here is an extract from what I have written so far. I welcome your comments, Zuni.

"The Russian is a squat, homuncular figure given to debauchery and violence. He is much shorter than anyone else. Richard Pipes has demonstrated that the Russian is at least half a metre shorter than the average civilised western person. In addition to his dwarf like stature, he has a very small penis. Whatever activity the Russian puts his hand to invariably results in an orgy of vodka drinking, accompanied by the discordant sound of the balalika. When not starving, or being starved, traditional Russian fayre consists of a roughly hewn stone cup filled with the blood of their own children. Richard Pipes has shown that this is all they know. The Russian has a large ring through its nose by which a succession of brutal leaders has lead it throughout its history."

and deeply offensive since I am Russian myself.

This is a cheap shot and quite childish.

Let's face it, it's about as objective as the rubbish you've been writing about Russia.

Everything I have written is backed up by facts. Prove me wrong instead of childishly slandering me.

"Legend has it that a terrible thunderstorm raged as the mother labored to give birth to the new prince, and mystics were seeing terrible omens. Ivan was destined to be the first Tsar of Russia, and among history’s most notorious figures. His life would be one of almost supernatural evil."

That's pure drama. Not a fact in sight.

Do you want me to continue?

many of that mysticysm is rooted in Russian folklore regarding Ivan's birth. I found that, I believe, in Paul Milikov's 'History of Russia' but I could be mistaken.

Paul Milikov said it, so it must be true. He was actually at the birth, then? He experienced this thunderstorm, did he? It's a fact.

Hmmm...

You are acting like a child. The myth is as significant as the (disputable)factuality of it. The fact that Russian folklore records it that way says a lot about how Russians viewed Ivan.

Myths are exactly that.

The problem with what you have written is that is high on drama and opinion, but low on fact.

all of the information I read about Ivan was usually found in more than one source. The Oprichnina, the dungeons of Alexanrskaya Sloboda, the religious fanaticism, the self-mutiliation, the rape of Novgorod, the sacking of Klim, the use of wild dogs to kill Shuishky, the livonian-Lithuanian wars, the assault of his son's pregnant wife and the murder of his son are in virtually all sources about Ivan.

You must realize when dealing with middle age history, facts are going to be mixed with myths. There is not the same kind of records about events then as there is now.

It is a well known fact that all Russians are Capricorns, which imparts in them the natural capriciousness of which they are well known.

The Russian, coming off the frozen steppes of the East, has only comparatively recently been christianized (in 988 by St. Vladimir), and still follows many heathen traditions of yore. He readily takes to a harsh drink which he calls vodka, and is known to utter oaths fouler than are known in the civilised world without shame, even in the presence of a female.

The Russian often smokes the devil weeds until he is impotent and stinking like an old campfire.

:-)

Substitute 'Irish' and 'whiskey' in that story, and it could come straight from any mid-19th Century British text about Eire. :P

"small penises". Everyone knows that a son of Eire wouls say "wee penises".

:evilgrin:

just ask the missus...

And I've never had any complaints.

...well...about that. :D

otherwise it's just rumor. :evilgrin: