I'm back!

Anyone miss me?

Went to Bar Harbor and Southwest Harbor since Wednesday. It was, as any trip to the Atlantic Ocean, beautiful as always. It's especially special to me because I have many memories of my youth as my family drove through on the way to Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, every summer. But just being at the edge of the ocean, and contemplating Creation (no, not the religious kind--just the "spiritual" kind) is an experience that gives strength.

I was truly amazed--and yes, dismayed, however, to see so many homes and businesses up there for sale. Coming through Maine on Route 1, kind of makes you wonder what the problem is. Is it the economy? Is it simply the fact that we have an asshole for president?

An interesting encounter did occur, however, at the Bass Harbor Light House. There was a woman and her son visiting, and she was wearing the Crawford Peace House tee-shirt. I got to talking with her about it, and she was there when Cindy was there last year for awhile, though she is from that area herself. I asked her if she knew anything about the effort to get Bill Moyers to run for governor, and I forgot that I had heard vaguely about it. She said some people in Maine (which is pretty liberal) made some snide comments to her about "loving" the president, and she was a little annoyed because they seemed to presume she was a Bushbot.

We talked for a few moments about the Angela Merkel incident, and the three of us were in agreement about him being a slimebag and worse. Anyhow, that was about it, but it was nice to talk with someone about it.

On a more personal and serious note, I had it out with my supposed best friend. My fundie friend was with me, and we talked long and hard about a lot of things, including the fact that she's heading to Kentucky next week to meet (for the first time) and to marry a guy she met online and has corresponded with for only 6 months. I told her that if she married this guy after only knowing him for six months, she was a complete and utter fool, IMO. She said she let the "lord" make up her mind for her, and that she's going to do it because she got a "sign." Sure, I get signs almost daily, but I don't go and change my life instanteously for that reason. I told her if she went ahead with it, there was absolutely nothing that she and I had in common anymore, and good luck with her new life, but not to include me in it. I also said that she would rather believe and trust someone she's known for six months than her best friend was has known and cared for her like a sister for 20 years. She told me I was carrying around a lot of hatred. Uh, huh. I also told her many of us would be glad to get rid of all the Christians who would be "raptured" if such an impossible event ever occurred. She said she was very hurt by that comment. Considering it's a joke, considering the chances of such ever happening are 10 to the 100th power to 1, she really has slipped into the far right's clutches as surely as I am an atheist. I told her she has expressed to me on a frequent basis what she thinks of "secular" people, so I told her what I thought of that as well. I know, I've mentioned this before, but when you are utterly and completely frustrated by someone's newfound ignorance, it's really time to give them an eye-opener. And I did. Whether I should be complimented or condemned isn't really the answer here, but just telling her, for the first time, all the hurt I have felt for so long, made the catharsis worth it. Whether there is any future for us as friends, I don't know. All I do know is that I don't need to swallow any of her shit anymore and remain silent about how I really feel anymore. I've been hurt too many times and kept silent because of how I feel about my friendships. But it was time to open her eyes to all the shit I've been subjected to for a very long time.

Anyhow, in a way the trip led to that whole confrontation because it opened my eyes to the fact that none of us is going to live forever, and having toxic people in our lives is often a cause of a great deal of misery. And whether they know they're toxic or not is perhaps something we need to tell them because otherwise we are sparing "their feelings" and creating a new ulcer for ourselves. I happen to think that there are really very few people we can truly call true friends, but if they don't feel the same, it becomes a wasted effort to try to keep something alive when there is nothing good being derived from it. And keeping a friend who is never there for you when you really, truly need someone to talk with, is not really in your own best interest. We shall see what we shall see.

Sorry for the big downer there at the end, but I just felt I had to tell someone. And right now, there are too few someones out there who really give a shit!

I'm back, though, I'm bad and I'm ready for total immersion, once again, in the Bizarro World of Bush's Wild Kingdom.

Sounds like you had a very nice trip......

And I am pleased that you finally dealt with your fundie "friend."

Long overdue, IMHO.......

Good luck to her...

She is going to need it!

I'm glad you're home, safe with us! :hug:

I am hoping that my decided clinging to what had become something not viable in my life is now over, and if she wants to remain friends, she is going to have to do it on my terms, not on hers, which is how it has always been.

I told her that famous Jessie Venture line, which I hope really made an impression: the one about religion being a crutch for people who can't handle reality. I doubt if it will, though.

And then she said she believed in the bible because it was the book about Jesus's life. And that she didn't believe in what men said, which was when I told her that believing in creationism is bullshit. She said that Darwin made a "death-bed" confession that he had made up a whole bunch of stuff about evolution in his book and that evolution is only a "theory" like "creationism." I told her that the bible was also written by MEN, men who were powerful enough to want to keep a servant class and tell them their "reward" was in heaven not on earth, so that's what they made sure was in the book. I also reminded her of the many, many inconsistencies in the bible between old and new testaments, and she ignorantly said, "no there aren't!" So, I've just destroyed her fantasy world for her, but not really. She will reject anything I've said and go back to blindly reciting from a book that tries to leach allegories, NOT fact. Ces la vie.

Sorry about your friend. Major religious differences are tough on relationships; I've felt the strain on friendships myself.

Glad you enjoyed youself, though. We all need some relaxation nowadays! :hi:

As soon as my car and I are able to get back on the road, I think I will be making a trip up the coastline on my own. A quiet reflective trip can yield so much peace and tranquility and while company is always nice for those who hate to travel alone, sometimes being alone is the ultimate goal, anyhow.

today on "toxic friendships" and found that a lot of what I've experienced is fairly normal to people who have had friends to whom they can relate no longer. I'm glad I finally had enough insight to end it now. I've felt betrayed and used, but if I have gleaned anything from it, it is that sometimes friendships end for no other reason than as people we grow and can grow apart from what we used to want and need.

I just wish it wasn't so painful.