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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 02:51 PM
Original message
****A Poem****
I love you with an intensity that burns through me

It takes me by surprise

The clarity of it is amazing

It feels like stone in the morning.........

The hardness of it astonishes me

Yet the warmth it has in the sunlight

Sustains me.......

Like a granite slab in the mountains.......

Resting quietly under the blue sky

Waiting for someone's footstep on it

To remind it of what is important........

I know its awful truth

And where it will lead me I have no idea

But there it is........

Intense, alive, fucking real........

I look into you with my wide open eyes

The intensity of my love amazes me........
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 03:03 PM
Response to Original message
1. Great Poem Peggy
It's intense just reading it.

"Intense, alive, fucking real........

I look into you with my wide open eyes

The intensity of my love amazes me........"

I know that many people don't know this kind of intense, it's wonderful to get a sense of it through your words.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 03:09 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. My dear OhioBlues.......
Thank you!

I didn't think anyone was paying attention today!

Glad you were my first responder, sweetie......

Believe me, I felt this.....I had to in order to write it down....

RetroLounge's poem today was the inspiration.......

I appreciate your remarks muchly!


:hug:
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Call Me Wesley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:02 PM
Response to Original message
3. Very intense and spontaneous.
I know its awful truth is a very strong line I really, really like.

I'm glad to see you writing, photographing - expressing yourself through different medias. Did you ever do this before? I mean expressing yourself in writing?

:hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:08 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. My dear Call Me Wesley!
How nice of you to say all these kind words!

I've been dabbling in writing all my life....off and on....

But only since I've been on DU has it taken on a greater role for me...

I have been inspired by various events here, as you may know.....

Exposure to other poets has been very important!

I thank you so much......


:hug:
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Call Me Wesley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:15 PM
Response to Reply #5
9. Exposure to other poets is quite dangerous
in a good way of course. :) There are many poets to explore and devour. My main poet will always be Gottfried Benn. (Not many translations available, unfortunately.)

I'm glad it became a greater part in your life; it is essential.

:loveya:
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:08 PM
Response to Original message
4. Nice...
This is my favorite part: It feels like stone in the morning.........The hardness of it astonishes me

I love granite, too, by the way. Reading your poem, I remembered the black and white granite we found on a hike, once, above Lake Tahoe...it's beautiful in the sunlight-- the way it glistens. And, it's unforgetable...as I'm sure your love is!

Thank you for sharing this with us. :hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:10 PM
Response to Reply #4
7. My dear KC2!
Oh, sweetie, the granite in the mountains was just the stone I had in my mind when I visualized this poem.......

It is my pleasure to share this with you.........

Thank you...... :hug:
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idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:09 PM
Response to Original message
6. wow.
having you say 'fucking real' did me a world of good.

quite a paradigm shift.

I've been thinking about this love stuff lately and I'm not even sure I could handle it...not the kind you are talking about here. You portrayed it well.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:14 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. My dear idgiehkt.........
Wow.....thank you!

I don't know how I handle it, either..........

Some days, not so well.....

I am really glad you like it.......

Your comments mean a great deal to this newbie writer!

:hug:
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REDKING Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:28 PM
Response to Original message
10. Again I am blown away................
Peggy that is beauiful......I have something for you....what do you think?
"my dreams are beyond and beneath the settng sun"...Peace RK:+
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:33 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. My dear Rory!
I am happy to see you today!

Thank you for your kind words........

And.......I love your words......

Very lovely! Are you writing a poem too?

I would love to see whatever you're writing when you're done with it...

And since you have a star, you can post it in the Writer's forum too......

Thanks for coming by today!

:hug:
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REDKING Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:40 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. A poem?..no...a prayer maybe,a wish..
I want to write a beautiful...........Peace..RK:+
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REDKING Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:33 PM
Response to Original message
11. Again and again Peggy...
I want this poem up there...............I needed something tonight.and the Lady of DU answers..I am blessed.Peace..RK:+
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 04:34 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. You have the poet's soul, my dear Rory........
I love to see what you write...always!

I am profoundly touched by you........

:loveya:
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Ptah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:35 PM
Response to Original message
15.  .. .. . . ... .
"Yet the warmth it has in the sunlight

Sustains me......."


:hug: :hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:39 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. My dear Ptah.........
How eloquent you are, and almost without words!

Thank you, sweetie.......

It means so much to me........:loveya: :hug:
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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:41 PM
Response to Original message
17. Beautiful, if beyond the stone that is me.
:)

:thumbsup:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:51 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. My dear WIMR!
Thank you!

I'm not sure I understand you.....if beyond the stone that is me.

What do you mean by this?

Glad you liked it, though!

:hug:
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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:52 PM
Response to Reply #18
20. What I mean is, although I think it is beautiful...
Edited on Sun Aug-27-06 05:53 PM by WritingIsMyReligion
...I'm probably as yet too young, too hard, and too generally stone-like to fully appreciate it, from the depths of my own experience, as others here undoubtedly can. :)

:hug:
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Miss Marmelstein Donating Member (650 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:51 PM
Response to Original message
19. I just found this thread and poem....
and it is really quite beautiful.

The first 4 lines are incredible! You have so many talents!

:hug:

:bounce: :bounce:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 05:55 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. My dear Miss Marmelstein!
Wow! Thank you!

Ah, I just thrash around and things come out.......:blush:

I'm honored that you have such a high opinion of this......

Thank you, sweetie......

The first four lines, huh?

I'll have to go back and re-read them!

:bounce: :bounce:
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speedoo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 07:44 PM
Response to Original message
22. Wow, Peggy. That's just beautiful...
Can you tell me what you mean by...

"I know its awful truth"

I really would like to know.... thanks.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:15 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. My dear speedoo!
I'm so pleased that you like my poem.......

You know, I can't really tell you what that phrase means......

I don't know........

It just felt right writing it down in that spot....

I would say, it means whatever you want it to....

Sorry!

Thanks for coming by today.......:hug:
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speedoo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 10:05 PM
Response to Reply #23
29. Oh Peggy, don't say you're sorry...
I respect your answer, so no need to apologize!

My feeling is that since the phrase seemed right to you there, it must have some meaning within the poem. So I will have to work on what it means for me.

And I will let you know... okay?

At first, I thought it was referring to death and the end of the love the poem is about. But maybe it's more subtle... I'll think about it some more.

:hug: :hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 10:52 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. My dear speedoo.......
I appreciate your lovely response!

I can tell you that the phrase has nothing to do with death, or the end of love........

In fact, for me, there is no end to love in my poem.......

At least not while I was writing it.....

That thought did not occur to me.....

And, yes, I would love to hear what you think once you've puzzled through it......

I love thoughtful dialogues!

:hug: :hug:
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speedoo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 02:03 AM
Response to Reply #30
31. Peggy, I think you might have been using the phrase as a metaphor...
from wiki, re. metaphor: "This device is known for usage in literature, especially in poetry, where with few words, emotions and associations from one context are associated with objects and entities in a different context."

So the "awful truth" of the love you are describing, is not really "awful", but definite and uncompromising. There is no doubt about it. The use of the word "awful" is a device to underscore that.

I have not studied poetry for many many years, but this makes sense to me.

What do you think?

(I like thoughtful discussions too.):thumbsup:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 08:52 AM
Response to Reply #31
32. Good morning to you, my dear Speedoo!
It could very well be a metaphor! "Awful" as metaphor for definite and uncompromising........Could be!

But you give me too much credit.......I was honestly not thinking consciously of that.

But perhaps I was, unconsciously.......

I've never been any good at interpreting poems, even my own.......usually!

You do make sense to me!

(Yes, let's hear it for thoughtful discussions!):thumbsup:


:hi:
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speedoo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 10:27 AM
Response to Reply #32
37. Yes, it works for me.
And I'm glad to hear it may work for you also.

Were you unconsciously thinking that way when you wrote it? I think so. I think we all occasionally verbalize something that may sound kinda wierd, but when we search for the meaning of it, there's something big going on beneath the surface.

"awful truth" just reinforces the strength of the love the poem is about.

So thank you for sharing your wonderful poem.:yourock:
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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:22 PM
Response to Original message
24. Oh, btw, Peggy dear--
Edited on Sun Aug-27-06 08:22 PM by WritingIsMyReligion
I just used Beautiful, if beyond the stone that is me as the first line in a poem I just wrote.

:evilgrin:

Thanks for the inspiration; I really got off on my own reply to you! :) ;)

:hi:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #24
25. My dear WIMR!
Well, now........how about that?

Wonderful!

You should post it.......

Isn't it interesting how inspiration works?

I mean, RetroLounge's poem this morning was my inspiration!

And now I've handed it off to you....

I could not be more pleased, sweetie!

:hi:
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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:28 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. Funny how these things happen.
:)

I'm going to post it right now.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:30 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. I'll be looking for it.......
:yourock:
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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-27-06 08:31 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. Just posted.
With due credit to your muse jump-starting thread, of course.

*bows*

:D

;)
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buddhamama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 08:56 AM
Response to Original message
33. good poem, Peggy
thank you sharing. you reaffirm everyday, my opinion that you're a talented and kind person. :hug:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 09:01 AM
Response to Reply #33
34. My dear buddhamama.........
I thank you for your very kind thoughts.......

I hardly deserve them.......

My thoughts are rough-hewn and they tumble out of me every which way.....

But I am privileged to have them be meaningful to you..........

Thank you so much!

:hug:
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Arkham House Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 10:02 AM
Response to Original message
35. This is beautiful...
...it has an almost Chinese sensibility, in that the images and feelings are direct and delicate, yet hard-edged too...ever read any Chinese poetry? I've read quite a bit in translation, and some--kinda--in the original...incidentally, the F-word is just right in context...
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 11:34 AM
Response to Reply #35
38. My dear Arkham House........
I have not read any Chinese poetry.........

My husband tried to learn some, but found it waay too difficult......

I never even got close to trying!

I'm so pleased that you find my poem beautiful!

I too thought the F-word worked.......

Thank you so much!


:hug:
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FedUpWithIt All Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 10:19 AM
Response to Original message
36. Very beautiful, CaliforniaPeggy,
You have expressed the intensity of love, perfectly. Blissful and terrifying.

I like your use of stone to express the weight of the feeling. Earthy, natural, solid.

Thank you for sharing it. :hug:


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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 11:37 AM
Response to Reply #36
39. My dear FedUpWithIt All.........
Oh, I thank you so much!

I find that if I let myself be myself, that I can truly express what's inside me....

And that was the case here.......

You have summarized my poem perfectly!

I thank you........:hug:
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wildhorses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 01:25 PM
Response to Original message
40. you just wanted to drop the F-bomb....but, really
CalPeg...NICE ONE:thumbsup:

love in all its sunlit tenderness and all its rock solidness

intense:loveya:
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-28-06 03:25 PM
Response to Reply #40
41. My dear wildhorses.......
Oh, sweetie, I sure do appreciate your words!

...sunlit tenderness and all its rock solidness...

That is such a terrific description!

Thank you so much......

:loveya:
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