Last Friday, a 75 year old female vet at the gym asked if I was gay....

She's on oxygen, hard of hearing and can't see shit but she walks the treadmill faithfully every day. She looks rather sour but she isn't. We've talked a few times and I learned she's an ex-lt col who headed a nurses unit during Korea and Viet Nam. She hates Bush and is incensed by the war, tv preachers, and Republicans.

Most days, my partner and I come in together to use the facilities. We rarely speak to each other, but its a small place so we're obviously together. Friday, I came in alone and the room was nearly vacant, except for "Bobbie" who was on one of the treadmills. We spoke, and she asked where my "buddy" was. I walked over to her to answer and, out of the blue, she asked:

"Are you gay?"

Without even thinking (we're not formally out" there, we just go), I said "Yeah"

Her response? A smile, a nod and "Me too".

Blew me away! She even outed another club member who graduated high school with her! We talked for about 20 minutes and I really felt a connection between the generations thats hard to describe. I hope to get an opportunity to know her better, but its difficult. She lives with her sister, also a club member, who doesn't know she's gay.

I'd love to have her over for dinner. God, the stories she could tell.

Mature women rock!

I especially liked the part where you said mature women rock!! ;-)

She has the sharpest wit of anyone I know and we're due a visit. I've been truly blessed to know MANY extraordinary women in my life who have had an enormous effect on me. From great aunts, to friends, to professors, to neighbors, I stand by those words: "Mature women rock!". Though young and middle aged women have their good points also.....

What a hell of a story!

She totally rocks! As do you, of course......

That was a twist I did not expect!

Mature women rock!

I like that!

:toast:

blessed to know some truly incredible women.

:thumbsup:

It was not what I expected to hear.

I can't even imagine being 75-years-old and not having my own sister know I was gay. I came out to my sister when she was 14 and I was 18.

without being humiliated or physically harmed (at least in some situations). But it wasn't that long ago that Matthew Shepard was crucified. When I (sorta) came out in the 1970's it wasn't cool. When she (they lady at the gym) was coming out in the 1950's, it was MUCH worse.

I only told my mom when I was 35 (she said she'd always known but why the hell did she keep asking me who I was dating?). Thank God things are getting better now. Maybe within the next couple of generations, sexual identity will become like hair color or height, a simple fact of life.

More likely the bigots will breed us out genetically.

I'm not willing to throw you under the bus for votes. :hug:

My doctor was head nurse at a MASH in Vietnam, and she's also gay.

:shrug:

Not necessarily famous or important people (though I've met a few of those), but truly interesting people.

Sounds like you can take your friendship to a new level with her, having shared something that's so important. I'm sure you'll both inspire each other....

:hi: It's nice that you can appreciate the Wise Woman in her. :thumbsup:

In three short words ("So am I"), she totally blew me away. And I thought I was mature and at least somewhat perceptive.

that is so nifty!

I agree she will be fascinating! :thumbsup:

her sister and (while she's a nice lady), I have NO interest in having her over also. We couldn't talk freely and it would be awkward as hell. Your obvious response is "Don't invite her sister" but its not that easy. She's already told me she's "well fixed" as to income so the family will probably think we're trying to latch on to that (she's openly contemptuous of her nieces and nephews who're "waiting aroung like vultures" for her to die). I'm gonna take it slowly, but I really would love to get to know this lady better. If I could write, there's a book there, just waiting to be written.

Maybe her sister's gay, too. Or maybe you'll just get to know more about her without being as free as you might like. Time will allow the friendship to be more open.

If she is, we'll deal with her sister separately. "Bobbie" doesn't much care for her sister because "she thinks every time the church's door is open, you need to be there. Well, I'm not that interested!"

They're VERY different people, both nice, but only one really interesting. That said, I'd do whatever was necessary to get a chance to talk to "Bobbie" about her life and career. I also knew my mom's male first cousin and best friend who was also gay back in the 1950's and he was absolutely fascinating. His stories of Mobile, Alabama's gay scene in the 1950's were positively scandalous!

There ae so few "elders" in the gay community that each one must be cherished.

conveniently timed to conflict with worship services...

It's great that you're taking an interest in her. I doubt she would have confided in you, or even have asked you such a personal question, if she wasn't interested in getting to know you better.

sis is still in church! There a couple of great local places that I'll bet she'd love (including my favorite Mexican place). Far more easy to suggest than bringing her to our house for lunch and I'll bet she'd take us up on it! Thanks, that is a great suggestion and I can't umagine why I hadn't thought of it already.

I am grateful that she can see the advances (albeit far fewer than there should be) that have been made toward equality for us all. I bet she would have some great stories for you. :hug:

I'd like to hear about her life. :)

A middle aged, gay female friend of mine said she can always tell another gay person over a straight person and she actually proved it to me one time. We were both standing at an intersection when another friend of mine who is also gay pulled over in his truck and said hello to us briefly. I never said (and would never say) "oh by the way, so and so, meet so and so and they're also gay", I just introduced them by name. When he drove off my lady friend told me, "I'll bet he's in high demand", I asked her to explain and she said, "gay men like that, ones that are big and masculine, ones that most straight people like you would never know are in high demand". I asked if she had met him before and she swore she didn't.

Seriously, I'm sure it was a just lucky guess but it was cute when it happened :hi:

i love stories like that.

life if you don't! :-)

(If brunch goes well, you can ask her over.)

She's to interesting to let slip by.

She sounds like a likely candidate for a DUer. If she has a computer, see if you can snag her!:-)

keep us posted...bet she can tell some interesting stories...

imagine that - she even served her country. Go figure!!

:sarcasm:

It will be good for both of you.

the little connections we make with other people...somehow these little things can shine through all the gloom out there, these are clearly the moments that make humanity worth keeping alive.