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someone please help me! I think I have created a small black hole in my house!

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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:37 PM
Original message
someone please help me! I think I have created a small black hole in my house!
The clock on the VCR says "12:37," and the clock on the microwave says "12:38."

now I'm afraid to go into the kitchen for fear I'll be sucked into the void!
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Goblinmonger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:39 PM
Response to Original message
1. Crawl on the floor and fix one
NOW! the black hole is probably floating in midair, so a good belly crawl should work.





Can I watch? And take pictures to share with the lounge?
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:44 PM
Response to Reply #1
8. okay. yeah, but you'll have to hurry if you want pix
there's something burning on the stove . . .
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madinmaryland Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:40 PM
Response to Original message
2. In our bed, depending on which side you are on, there is a four minute
difference. There's definately a vortex in our bed!!
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:45 PM
Response to Reply #2
9. which one of you has to sleep on the vortex
after your, uh, celestial explorations?
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madinmaryland Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:59 PM
Response to Reply #9
18. That would be on her side!!
:evilgrin:
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ZombieNixon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:41 PM
Response to Original message
3. Fuck!
My laptop says 1:41. The desktop at work says 1:40. The only thing between the two computers is me. Ergo, I am a black hole. :wow: :scared:
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:46 PM
Response to Reply #3
10. be careful when you do laundry
or you could lose socks
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bicentennial_baby Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:42 PM
Response to Original message
4. there's a black hole in my email!
My Inbox is set to the right date and time, but my Spam/Bulk box is off by a week and about 31 years! Series! It says 2038! :o
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ZombieNixon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:43 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. Silly you!
It's 2038 in Nigeria, don'cha know? :P
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bicentennial_baby Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #5
12. Doh! I'm such a douchebag!
:D
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #4
11. you will get the mother of all spam attacks
in about 31 years
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JackBeck Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:43 PM
Response to Original message
6. You're not alone.
My stove clock is 4 minutes faster than the cable box's time in the kitchen. I'm afraid to go between them to grab a knife.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #6
13. why do you need a knife?
ohhh. to cut the cable and restore order to the universe.
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:44 PM
Response to Original message
7. Don't worry, -
they only eat one sock out of every other pair in the dryer, and the occassional writing implement.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:49 PM
Response to Reply #7
15. so, if I go in there barefoot
I'll only have to worry about returning with an empty pocket protector?
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:50 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Exactly.
But don't peek into the pocket protector during your trip into the kitchen. That would invoke Heisenberg's Principle.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:55 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. and I could end up with Schroedinger's cat
in my pocket protector?!?

gross.
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Richard Steele Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:04 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. No, but there's a certain risk of ending up with Schroedinger's PEN.
Which is a frustrating thing to try to use-
you take the cap off, and half the time the dang
thing is dead!
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:05 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. I wonder what I could do to make sure I get some of
Schroedinger's Ink?

:rofl:
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Goblinmonger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:18 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. I have some pens with that
You scribble until you are sure it is out of ink and then, presto, it starts writing...until you go to write on what you intended and then it doesn't write anymore.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #22
24. if it's a pen with blue ink
how could a black hole possibly have any effect?

:shrug:
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Goblinmonger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:29 PM
Response to Reply #24
26. Cause it would suck out
all the color and that's why it looks like it isn't writing. Duh.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:32 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. but then wouldn't it be a blue hole?
which we all know would be crowded with yuppie adventure vacationing scuba divers?
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Goblinmonger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. I hate Illinois yuppies.
:rofl:
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PVnRT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 02:48 PM
Response to Original message
14. Small black holes tend to evaporate quickly
If I were you, I would build a device to harness the awesome energy available from it.
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:06 PM
Response to Reply #14
21. I have a paper clip, two TV remotes
and a bag of mixed nuts

can I build it using those things?
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:20 PM
Response to Original message
23. No, you cracked the space-time continuum
If it was a black hole, it would have fallen to the center of the Earth already. Actually, it would fall through, pop up on the other side of the planet, fall again, etc., etc., etc., until it finally came to rest in the earth's molten core, sucking up magma until the Earth was a hollowed-out ball.

No, you cracked the space-time continuum. Try not to step on it or you'll break your mother's back in seven or eight dimensions. I heard that that really makes your underwear ride up something fierce!

Starbucks made a no-time zone in Houston when they put two Starbucks franchises across the street from one another. Just ask Lewis Black about it... :-)
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:23 PM
Response to Reply #23
25. man. imagine what would happen
if the time was different between the two starbucks!

:scared:
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:51 PM
Response to Reply #25
29. You'd run into yourself, causing your matter to spontaneously detonate
Edited on Fri Jan-19-07 03:51 PM by krispos42
And Einstein sez E=mc2

175 kilos times 300,000,000 m/s times 300,000,000 m/s= 15,750,000,000,000,000,000 joules of energy released, or 1.575E19.

That's 3,760,000 kilotons of explosive power, or 251,000 times the destructive power of Hiroshima.

I used 175 kilos because there are two people meeting and detonating. :-)

Lesson: don't shake hands with yourself!

<edit: bad html>
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-19-07 03:56 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. I knew I shouldn't have had that breakfast burrito
and the venti americano
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