Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

Do you have a personal quality/characteristic/habit that embarrasses even you?

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 10:57 PM
Original message
Do you have a personal quality/characteristic/habit that embarrasses even you?
Lisa wants to know what it is. I've got a boatload of them but I'm not telling.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:01 PM
Response to Original message
1. Apparently I Snore
But I don't believe it. Not for a minute. I've never heard it, so how can it be true? Just a made up fantasy of the hundreds of people I have slept with. They are all liars! Liars I tell you!

Q
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:02 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. My friend, you snore so loudly that I can hear you in Maine!
hehe. Seriously, I don't think you snore at all. No way. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:07 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Actually, That's Not A So Much Of A Stretch
You're in Maine...........I'm in Quebec. Pretty damn close. You probably have heard me snore. So sorry for the noise crim son. Won't happen again.

Q
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:04 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. Hundreds Of People...
wow

:shrug:

all liars huh?

:rofl:

hundreds? really?

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:15 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. Actually Yes.........
If you know anything at all about the sex history of gay men my age.........let's just say that before the dawn of AIDS I was quite the little rabbit. I got around. It wasn't unusual for me to sleep with a dozen men a week. Yes it was like that at one time. Bath Houses, Parks, Parties, etc, etc, etc. You really have no idea how hedonistic the whole scene was..........

Q
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:17 PM
Response to Reply #7
13. Actually
i had a friend that spent a good deal of time in LA in the early 80's and unfortunately he also contracted HIV and died of AIDS but yes, he talked about the life he lived out there.

So I don't have the personal experience, but I do get what you are saying.

I miss my friend too, it's so sad that such a terrible thing had to happen.

:cry:

:hi:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:24 PM
Response to Reply #13
21. I Also Lost Many Friends
And to this day I still can't understand how I survived. I had unprotected sex with people in the past who have since died. That just freaks me out. I go for an HIV test 3 times a year and it's always neg. How is that possible? I'm not trying to tempt fate here, but really...how can I get away with this when so many of my friends have died?

Q
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:27 PM
Response to Reply #21
24. I Don't Know My Friend
I can imagine that there have to be some people that are naturally resistant to any virus, because no virus is 100% lethal.

Maybe there is some genetic protective influence that you have.

Glad you are well.

Sorry for your losses :hug:

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:42 PM
Response to Reply #24
37. Thank You
You Sir..........are a real gentleman.

Q
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:01 AM
Response to Reply #37
46. Hey, It's Just A Sad
thing and I think about all the people that lost people they loved to a disease that the government tried to ignore for so long.

I remember my friend who died talked about getting involved with ACT UP and going and strapping bombs to himself. Of course he never did, but I remember the anger and the fear when he talked about what he saw being done. This was back in the mid 80's and so much has changed since then- yet, the government still could do so much more in my opinion.

thanks

SPK
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
martymar64 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #21
142. My stepbrother died of AIDs
Please be careful, we want to keep you around.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Katherine Brengle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #1
6. OMG my husband snores so loudly he has to sleep in the living room.
No joke, it's so loud, and so consistent, that I literally cannot sleep if he is in the room.

We had to put a damn futon in the living room.

Anyone know of a cure for snoring?

:(
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:15 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Apparently there's a surgical procedure
but I can't imagine having it done unless the snoring was a health risk. My STBE snores so loudly that very early in the marriage I found myself sleeping elsewhere. It's tough, isn't it?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Katherine Brengle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:18 PM
Response to Reply #8
15. It sucks.
But I have to sleep, ya know?

Surgery seems drastic, agreed.

I tried wearing ear plugs but they made my ears hurt.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:28 PM
Response to Reply #15
26. That's what I did on holidays or other nights when I wanted to be
in the same bed. They don't make earplugs that powerful!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:19 PM
Original message
50% success rate
snoring loudly is usually tied to obstruction and sleep apnea too

does STBE stop breathing?

:shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:37 PM
Response to Original message
32. Not so you'd notice.
He's the healthiest man on the planet at 53 years. Seriously.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Kutjara Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:20 PM
Response to Reply #6
18. That can be a sign of sleep apnea.
He should go to a sleep clinic and get checked out. Sleep apnea kills a lot of people every year and prolonged snoring is a sign of it. The good news is that there are very effective treatments for it that both cure the apnea and, as a happy side-effect, will stop the snoring.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:21 PM
Response to Reply #6
19. cpap
surgery barely has a 50% success rate

if he has obstructive sleep apnea he needs to get on cpap - pm me if you want more info - or google it - or talk to his doctor - this is a serious problem that gets ignored in jokes about snoring - that is the least of it - think heart, kidneys and car accidents from drowsiness
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Kutjara Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:22 PM
Response to Reply #6
20. That can be a sign of sleep apnea.
He should go to a sleep clinic and get checked out. Sleep apnea kills a lot of people every year and prolonged snoring is a sign of it. The good news is that there are very effective treatments for it that both cure the apnea and, as a happy side-effect, will stop the snoring.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Seabiscuit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:43 PM
Response to Reply #20
39. Or, as I call it, just plain sleep crapnia.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:11 PM
Response to Original message
5. Ummm, Well
sometimes when I'm nervous I start coughing, kind of a nervous cough.
have done that since I was about 11 y/o

seems to be tied to some kind of FUCKING DISASTER in my life about that time I guess?

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:16 PM
Response to Reply #5
11. Yes, I think so.
:hug: :hug: :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:15 PM
Response to Original message
9. I talk to myself
Constantly. Sometimes I get caught doing it in public. Fortunately, it's only one side of the conversation; if I answered myself, I am sure someone would commit me.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:17 PM
Response to Reply #9
12. I ask and answer and I'm not wearing a straightjacket yet.
Talking to yourself is a sign of genius. :rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:19 PM
Response to Reply #12
17. Then I must be Einstein
or something.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:29 PM
Response to Reply #12
27. Here's The Key
it's okay to talk to yourself

it's okay to answer yourself

when you have to ask "what" to yourself, then you start to need to worry.

:rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SammyWinstonJack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #27
145. What?
:evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
dropkickpa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:21 AM
Response to Reply #9
63. Sometimes when I'm waiting for the bus
I'll be having a conversation with myself in my head (I actually do this all the time), and then I'll notice that at some point someone else has come to the busstop. And I always wonder if I was thinking out loud as I sometimes do, and, for the life of me, I can never figure out if it was all internal or vocalized.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:38 AM
Response to Reply #63
66. That happens to me too
I often can't tell if I have spoken out loud or simply thought it. I think it's because I live alone and usually talk out loud- at least I have a cat so I can always say I was talking to him! It's only when he starts talking back that I'll be in trouble.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:25 AM
Response to Reply #9
74. I once got caught talking to myself when I thought I was alone!
It was about 9 years ago. I was doing graveyard security at a high-rise, and I was patrolling around the building. I was going through some relationship problems and was talking to myself very angrily, thinking I was alone. I turn around and there is a man walking on the sidewalk right behind me! He didn't say anything, but that was still pretty embarrassing.

In the office I work at now, I think talking to oneself must be a job requirement! The majority of the people I work with have, on multiple occasions, said something and when I asked "What?" they have stated "I'm just talking to myself". Years ago, one of my co-workers stated that she was "talking to the crackers"! (she was trying to open them)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dervill Crow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:57 PM
Response to Reply #9
152. Answering yourself is perfectly fine.
If someone overhears you saying, "Huh?" to yourself, that's a very bad sign, though.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LadyoftheRabbits Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:16 PM
Response to Original message
10. Sometimes I snort...
when I laugh. :blush: Just a little one... :hide:

:P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:17 PM
Response to Reply #10
14. That's actually cute.
I'm pretty sure there are at least two other DUers who agree with me.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LadyoftheRabbits Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:32 PM
Response to Reply #14
28. Hope so...
:blush: :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:19 PM
Response to Original message
16. You want 'em
alphabetically or chronologically?

I don't know if I can count that high, though...

:shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:26 PM
Response to Reply #16
23. How about a few highlights?
I'll tell you one of mine: I have trouble understanding accented english. I hate that about myself, especially because I love talking to people from other places around the globe. Your turn!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:03 AM
Response to Reply #23
50. I have this tendency to ramble on endlessly
at the most inappropriate times. When I'm nervous or uncomfortable and I start to talk, it's almost impossible to shut me up.

So I try not to start at all.

Discretion is the better part of valor and all that...

:eyes:





Oh...and sometimes, when I laugh I, well...I bounce. I hate that.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:05 AM
Response to Reply #50
53. I'm in love with both your answers.
Personally, I'm in favor of both rambling and bouncing. :hi:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:35 AM
Response to Reply #53
76. I dunno...
I get people rolling their eyes at me all the time. "There she goes again..." I've even had remote controls pointed at me.

Go figure.

And my kids make fun of my laugh alllll the time. At least I offer some degree of entertainment for them, now that I'm entering my dotage...

:eyes:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:24 PM
Response to Original message
22. my laugh
kind people call it boisterous - most think OBNOXIOUS
my size embarrasses me more, though
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:28 PM
Response to Reply #22
25. Most people don't like their size.
It's too bad we even think about it, isn't it?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:09 AM
Response to Reply #25
56. if only...
to think that I actually thought I was heavy in my teens and 20's - :rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:12 AM
Response to Reply #56
58. I thought I was ugly as a young woman.
Aging is a bitch.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:33 PM
Response to Original message
29. I get sucked into arguments online that I would have no problem walking away from
in rl. I often wonder why this is. Why, there's an example in GD right now!!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:39 PM
Response to Reply #29
33. Could it be the anonymity?
I always going in there thinking I can post and run, but can't help responding when people argue with me. I hear ya. And... link? :evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:44 PM
Response to Reply #33
40. I think the anonymity is a big part of it, because when someone I know posted
I started backpedaling. I tend to treat the arguments like a game--especially the ones about Chicago! :)

Here's a link...
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=237691&mesg_id=237691
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:56 PM
Response to Reply #40
41. It looks to me like you're holding your own!
Never admit to backpedaling: you're "being fair and evenhanded". :rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:35 PM
Response to Original message
30. I'm thick.
Asperger's syndrome. I'm extremely gullible, clueless when it comes to discerning people's motives, take things literally when they aren't mean that way and believe that people are sincere when they are not; also stupidly honest to the point where it is harmful to me. It's a disability, and sometimes it causes me a lot of pain. I know you probably wanted levity, but that is what I am thinking of tonight, because I am trying to figure out how to protect myself because I keep making the same mistakes over and over. I really am not sure there is any hope; at this point it may just be wise to focus on pain management when I do make the inevitable aspie mistakes.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:41 PM
Response to Reply #30
34. Focus on pain management
and realize that people either do not understand, or else they're rather thick themselves and would rather not deal with it.

And no, I wasn't sure about levity. I think it's interesting, what we consider to be our own foibles. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:49 AM
Response to Reply #30
67. I have trouble reading people too
I tend to believe everything everyone tells me, no matter how outlandish, as long as they say it with a straight face. I don't know if I am hopelessly naive or gullible. My coworkers love to tease me because I will generally believe then, although I have learned mostly not to believe them at all. I have been burned in relationships because of this too. Like, i should have figured out that the reason I never met any of his friends was because he was still married and not divorced like he told me.



Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:05 AM
Response to Reply #67
68. amen
lots of stuff I should have figured out but didn't. Thanks for posting this, it's good to know I am not alone. I do know it, but it's good to be reassured. I'm tired of it though, being almost 40 and still getting 'taken' like this. I don't know what the answer is. I am sorry that you went through what you did, that is terrible. I have an unwavering belief in karma that gets me through when nothing else does. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:06 AM
Response to Reply #68
107. I have learned to ask questions and never assume
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 11:06 AM by alarimer
That was probably the most valuable lesson from that.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Spider Jerusalem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:28 AM
Response to Reply #30
70. I don't know about "thick", necessarily...
it's just a matter of being wired differently (or at least that's how I think of it). It does get rather frustrating, sometimes, though. (You might be able to relate somewhat to this; one of the best non-clinical descriptions of what it's like to have AS I've read, I think).
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:38 AM
Response to Reply #70
80. Wow.
I didn't understand.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Spider Jerusalem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:19 AM
Response to Reply #80
98. Okay, I will explain:
unlike "neurotypicals" ("NTs"; people with standard brain wiring; ie "normal"), those of us with Asperger Syndrome (and other autistic spectrum disorders) don't subconsciously process nonverbal communication (body language, etc). Doing so requires conscious effort; it doesn't come naturally. So we don't really pick up on subtext in conversation; we tend to be very literal-minded, and to take what people say at face value. And most of us don't make eye contact when speaking to another person, or, if we do, it's because we've learned you're "supposed to"; again, it doesn't come naturally, it requires concentration to maintain an "appropriate" level of eye contact, and it can be intensely uncomfortable. And our body language isn't "normal", either; doing things like matching gestures to spoken words, and modulating tone of voice, takes a conscious effort, too. All of this can create difficulties in day-to-day communication; most Aspies have mental scripts of what to say and do in a given situation so as to appear "normal", but sometimes that doesn't always work (and the sensory sensitivity issues that most Aspies have don't make any of this any easier).

So, having AS is a bit like being inside a box that LOOKS like a person (because NTs expect that here will be another person much like themselves, with the same responses, etc; when that's not the case).



Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:29 AM
Response to Reply #98
99. One of my neighbors is providing room and board to the son of another friend.
He's going to the local university and he has AS. I recognize much of what you describe in terms of his external behavior and we have both adapted so that we have a perfectly functional relationship... if somebody rings my doorbell and when I open the door, nobody is there, I know to come out of the house and look down the driveway, because that's where Bill will be standing. But I didn't understand what was driving his behavior. Thank you for helping me gain some perspective.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #98
143. awesome description, SJ
I really appreciate that. What I have had the most trouble with in life is just not picking up on social vibrations or understanding the machinations that go on behind the scenes in certain situations until they smack me right in the head, lol. So people who are particularly conniving and manipulative can have a lot of fun at my expense, if they are the kind of person that does that kind of thing for sport; i.e. sociopaths can have a field day with people like me.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Spider Jerusalem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:40 PM
Response to Reply #143
149. You're welcome...
and I've had my own share of problems thanks to social naivete and inability to read what's behind a certain situation; in addition to the negative experiences I had in childhood (which left me with PTSD and serious trust issues), the net result of all of it has been to make me more cynical and withdrawn, more or less for my own good; I've gotten to a point where I'm almost afraid to open up to anyone or allow myself to become close to someone, because it's been my experience that such things are probably going to end badly (although I suppose I'm lucky in that my best friend also has AS...we understand one another on an instinctive level, in a way that doesn't really seem possible in AS/NT friendships).
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:49 PM
Response to Reply #149
151. heavy sigh
I can so relate to that.

"I've gotten to a point where I'm almost afraid to open up to anyone or allow myself to become close to someone, because it's been my experience that such things are probably going to end badly."

I continually trust the wrong people...I am starting to think it is because I don't know who to trust so I am just drawn to people that seem familiar, like people who remind me of my parents or siblings...so something feels 'right' about them, although many times it ends up very wrong. I don't know what the answer is, but just hearing it articulated by someone else makes me feel less alone. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Spider Jerusalem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:50 PM
Response to Reply #151
181. I don't know that there is an answer, really...
it probably doesn't help that we can see certain things that draw us to other people without seeing OTHER things, those little subtextual cues, so to say, that might warn us away...and it seems cruelly irony that one can lack the ability to skilfully negotiate social interaction yet still desire human contact; sometimes it seems that becoming a solitary hermit wouldn't be so bad, but solitude, while bearable, gets pretty fucking lonely.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:24 PM
Response to Reply #70
148. yes, that is a good description
mine is not near as severe but I can really relate to the feeling of isolation. Thanks for linking that. :hi:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:35 PM
Response to Original message
31. No.
Redstone
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:41 PM
Response to Reply #31
35. Geez, Redstone.
Introspect much? :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:00 AM
Response to Reply #35
45. Niope.
Redstone
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:02 AM
Response to Reply #45
49. Bullshit.
But I'll nod and smile. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Chan790 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:41 PM
Response to Original message
36. I'm a know-it-all...
every time I open my mouth I feel like everybody in the room is thinking "Oh for the love of G_d will he just shut up."
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:57 PM
Response to Reply #36
42. But in the right crowd, you'd have a rapt audience :)
I mean, if you do in fact know it all.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
graywarrior Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:43 PM
Response to Original message
38. I swear like a muthafukka in public.
And I talk to myself in public and always get caught.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:57 PM
Response to Reply #38
44. When you get caught I hope you just keep on talking.
You? Cuss? I can't even imagine that. *snort*
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
graywarrior Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:13 AM
Response to Reply #44
60. I sneer.
It's my way.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-17-07 11:57 PM
Response to Original message
43. Yes, all of them.
:D
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:01 AM
Response to Reply #43
47. Be more specific.
:rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:04 AM
Response to Reply #47
52. How much time do you have?
:rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:07 AM
Response to Reply #52
54. I'm going to help you.
Do you do anything embarrassing when you're eating?

I know you have a job so you probably bathe now and then. Are you a mumbler? Do your palms get sweaty? Frequent gaseous emissions? :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:09 AM
Response to Reply #54
55. Yes, yes, yes, and sometimes.
:P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:11 AM
Response to Reply #55
57. I see.
I'm so sorry, SA! :7
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:12 AM
Response to Reply #57
59. I'm a horrible, horrible person.
:P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:17 AM
Response to Reply #59
61. I knew there was something about you I found attractive.
Now I really am going to bed. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:18 AM
Response to Reply #61
62. Sigh...
x( :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Prisoner_Number_Six Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:02 AM
Response to Original message
48. My feet both turn outward
due to arthritis. It makes me walk slightly funny.

:shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:03 AM
Response to Reply #48
51. That's a tough one.
I have rheumatoid and sometimes walking is a chore, so I empathize with you. :pals:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
dropkickpa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:22 AM
Response to Original message
64. I belch. A LOT.
Not sure why, it started after my gallbladder was removed, and I've done elimination diets and nothing helps. Anymore, I just tell people that look offended "Better the attic than the basement!"
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:39 AM
Response to Reply #64
82. So true, the attic vs. the basement.
The latter can be a personal tragedy; the former, just one more thing to love about you. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
nuxvomica Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:41 AM
Response to Reply #64
83. LOL. Yesterday I unexpectedly belched outside and it echoed
I live in a sort of bowl-shaped neighborhood and in the crisp, calm, quiet winter air that deep sudden belch resonated everywhere. I bet windows rattled. I am so lucky it wasn't a fart.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:43 AM
Response to Reply #83
85. A bowl-shaped neighborhood?
Maybe you should move. hehe
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
dropkickpa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #83
106. Hah!
Luckily, I work with a bunch of ladies who are as crude as me, so at least they don't get offended. I grew up with 5 brothers, so belching never bothered me. believe me, there were a lost worse habits that went on in our house to be offended by, much to my mothers dismay.:rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Generic Brad Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:54 AM
Response to Original message
65. I can't control my sarcasm
:sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm:
There it goes again.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:43 AM
Response to Reply #65
86. You know, I noticed that about you.
Smug bastard. :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
u4ic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:13 AM
Response to Original message
69. I talk before thinking
and inadvertently blurt out or even insult people once in a while. Not that I mean to - not at all! - in fact I'm surprised I can talk at all considering my foot is in my mouth most of the time. :silly:

It has won me a slew of board games, but other than that, blurting out the first thing that comes to my mind isn't always the best way to get through life. (though many things I blurt out are also compliments...)


The Chinese New Year is coming up, so here's my Chinese New Year resolution: to think before I say anything, or to think before acting.


:spray:


I wiiiillllll try...
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:35 AM
Response to Reply #69
79. Oh god, me too.
The more important and/or formal the event, the more likely I am to say something asinine. At least you're intelligent, u4ic; whatever you blurt can't be that bad. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
u4ic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:14 PM
Response to Reply #79
173. Thank you, but
I've had some doozies. x(


Only a couple of weeks ago I majorly insulted someone, but meant it as a compliment. In my head I knew what I meant, but when I spoke it, it didn't come out quite the way I liked. And I didn't realize till later it sounded like a huge insult. :blush:

It was someone I didn't know and will never meet again.


Oy vei. :dunce:


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Seabiscuit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:30 AM
Response to Original message
71. I have large bulbous warts all over every square centimeter of my face.
Nah... just kidding.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:42 AM
Response to Reply #71
84. Crap, I'm glad to hear it.
There is a disease where your body surface is covered with benign projecting tumors. The mere fact that some people have the disease and you don't is good reason to celebrate every stinking day.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
last_texas_dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:52 AM
Response to Original message
72. I reallly clam up in groups of people
I'm a pretty shy person to begin with, but even being way too nervous and self-conscious for my own good, if I can get a chance to talk to someone I don't know well one on one, I'm usually at least a competent, and sometimes even decent, conversationalist. (And if I'm in a group that consists entirely of people I know well and am comfortable around, I'm the biggest loudmouth in the group.) But say I'm talking to the person I don't know too well one-on-one and it's going well, when suddenly someone else joins the group. I'll pretty much drop out of the conversation and turn it over to the two of them. It's totally not something I try to do, but I'll inevitably do it over and over, no matter how often I tell myself to fight it.

Oh yeah, and there's the whole thing where when I'm in a situation that makes me really nervous (public speaking is the worst!) my feet get sweaty! haha That one's actually probably more embarrassing, but it's not so obvious as the clamming-up thing, so it's not so noticeable. Wow, I'm feeling really embarrassed just talking about this stuff!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:46 AM
Response to Reply #72
87. You just described me perfectly, except for the blush.
Do you blush, so that no matter how hard you work to control your body language i.e. act casual, your secret is instantly known? Fortunately I think there are a lot of people with the same problem and everybody understands. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
last_texas_dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Feb-19-07 02:53 AM
Response to Reply #87
183. Yeah
Particularly if I'm asked a question about something that makes me feel like I'm being put on the spot, or something that I don't know how to put into words... I'll start to blush or get some kind of goofy smile on my face! I guess it keeps me pretty honest, at least; since I know my body language is going to give away any secret I try to keep.

I do think that there are a lot of people who understand shy people, but I've worried throughout my life that certain things I've done have confused people or made them unsure what to think of me. I am glad that I'm not alone in having to deal with this kind of stuff, though at the same time I wish none of us had to! Thank you for your reassuring words. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:38 AM
Response to Reply #72
102. I have that problem too
It is social phobia.
Of course it makes life hard. It made getting a new job hard too, because sometimes I'd have to deal with a table full of people.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:40 AM
Response to Reply #102
103. Yeah. Even when I think I have everything under control,
my hands will shake which probably makes me look like I'm not capable of handling stress, in a situation like a job interview.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rhythm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:22 AM
Response to Original message
73. I ramble on about tangent things that no one else really cares about...
like this one time, when i was...











o.k... just kidding this time, but you get the idea.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:32 AM
Response to Reply #73
75. Aw, crap
I was looking forward to some good comedy. x(



Good evening. Well, we have in the studio tonight a man who says things in a very roundabout way. Isn't that so, Mr Pudifoot.

Yes.

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

Yes.

Well, I can't help noticing that, for someone who claims to say things in a very roundabout way, your last two answers have very little of the discursive quality about them.

Oh, well, I'm not very talkative today. It's a form of defensive response to intensive interrogative stimuli. I used to get it badly when I was a boy — well, I say 'very badly;' in fact, do you remember when there was that fashion for, you know, little poodles with small coats...

Ah, now you're beginning to talk in a roundabout way.

Oh, I'm sorry.

No, no, no, no. Please do carry on, because that is in fact why we wanted you on the show.

I thought it was because you were interested in me as a human being.
(leaves)

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:48 AM
Response to Reply #73
88. It just means you have an active mind.
Some of us care! :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
u4ic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:26 PM
Response to Reply #73
179. I am terrible for going off on tangents
I start off in Tuktoyatuk and end up in Timbuktu. :crazy:


I test those with even the best powers of concentration.:P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
BreweryYardRat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:40 AM
Response to Original message
77. I talk to myself and have poor social skills.
Also, I tell myself dirty jokes or funny stories (usually in my head) to take my mind off things when I'm feeling depressed.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:51 AM
Response to Reply #77
89. Not really. Really?
The talking to yourself... okay. Bu the dirty jokes and funny stories? Very unusual! :rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:45 AM
Response to Original message
78. Mine is really embarrassing, but more common than I thought
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 07:52 AM by Pushed To The Left
I'm a 34-year-old man who still lives at home, which I never would have expected to be the case years ago. I've worked hard, gotten raises, and gotten my degree, but I still don't make enough to afford rent out here. I think people in my situation have been the targets of hatred on just about every talk show, talk radio show, the internet, pretty much everywhere. However, as the cost of living gets more and more ridiculous when compared to wages, I find that more and more people are in my situation. Still, it doesn't feel good to know that I'm seen as a loser by so many people. :(
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:54 AM
Response to Reply #78
90. My thought on that is that if you can't afford the rent, you can't afford the rent.
OTOH, if you can afford the rent but paying for your own lodging is a burden because then you can't afford to buy all the DVDs you want, you can't pay for your cable and your beer, and your annual vacation, then yes, you are a loser I doubt that's you. It does describe my BIL however who is FIFTY-TWO and lives withi his mother despite making an exceedingly good living. :eyes:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:26 AM
Response to Reply #78
109. That's a cultural stigma
I have no clue why living with extended family is considered being a "loser" in America, when it's accepted and normal in other parts of the world.

Whenever I hear someone say stuff like that because a person lives with their parents, in my head there's a little voice calling them small-minded xenophobic consumerholics. Maybe you could train yourself to hear that same voice. :)

Really, it's their problem, brainwashed by American consumer culture, not yours. What you are doing is better for the environment (saving resources), more globally responsible, and less alienating in terms of human relations. It's a pathetic world state we're in when a person is seen as a loser for not hogging space and energy they don't need in order to assert --- I don't even know, to assert what? What would that prove to the world, exactly? That you are more responsible because you won't share resources with your fmaily?

It's the same mentality that looks down on people who live in trailers, and looks up to people that live in suburban houses that are thousands of square feet. Folks that use less resources are considered lesser, and we mock them - because as a culture we equate money with human worth, so you have to show off your money to earn respect.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #109
111. I'm not entirely sure that it's just about money/human worth.
Americans value independence even more than money... I honestly believe that... and there is a false assumption in this country that those without wealth are 100% responsible for their situation. Me, I don't buy it.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:26 PM
Response to Reply #111
119. If that's the case - that it's about independence, not wealth
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 12:35 PM by lwfern
why do you suppose there is the stigma about living in a trailer?


(Not that I necessarily disagree, I think Americans value independence sometimes to a fault, leading to alienation within our communities.)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
S n o w b a l l Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:48 AM
Response to Reply #109
113. Not really...
In America, we become adults at 18 and are expected to get out from the nest and become responsible and independent and not depend on mommy and daddy for support. It has nothing to do with consumerism or hogging resources. Because I don't find dependency on his parents particularly attractive in a man doesn't make me small minded. Xenophobic? I don't even know where that fits in. The consumerism doesn't play either since most people I know, including myself had roommates.

Perhaps I'm more passionate about this issue for personal reasons.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #113
121. I'm intrigued by the contrast between this and the previous post
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 12:33 PM by lwfern
#111 right above says they have an issue with living at home because they value "independence."

Your post makes it clear it's not about independence to you - because you put living with roommates above living with family. What is it that makes you value living with strangers above living with family?

Xenophobic is maybe a strong word, but I'd say there is a willingness to accept American culture as better than foreign cultures in this area, without examining the underlying reasons.

Maybe the way to ask this is: If you were temporarily living in some other culture where living with extended family was the norm, would you look down on those people?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:46 PM
Response to Reply #121
123. Are you assuming that the person living with family pays rent?
I'm not making that assumption.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:11 PM
Response to Reply #123
128. I didn't make an assumption about that one way or another
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 01:13 PM by lwfern
For all I know, the mortgage could be paid off by now.

I did make an assumption that he's contributing in some way to the household, which could be financial, or through chores, or through being there emotionally for his parents, etc. and I wouldn't necessarily value one of those ways over another.

I've had a spare living space in various houses I've owned for the past 15 years, and have had a variety of people living in those spaces, sometimes helping financially, sometimes helping in other ways - I housed a woman from Europe, a stranger, for a year, because as a single mom at the time, just having someone adult to talk to - without having to do the whole dating crap - had value for me. The husband and I are going to a place tomorrow that houses refugees waiting for political asylum, to see about offering up overflow space in our house if and when they need it. If my daughter decided to move back, I wouldn't take rent from her while housing other people for free.

I don't understand the value of paying to live somewhere else just to prove that you can. If you get along with your parents without conflict, if it's a mutually beneficial relationship and you're either single, or your partner gets along with them equally well, I'm not seeing the reason to buy/rent property. Seems like money down the toilet for me, like buying blackberries at the store when you have your own wild blackberries you can pick for free in your own backyard.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #128
130. I see your point, except that because there is a stigma, the adult person
living at home with his/her parents might possibly pay a price in social terms. My BIL has lived with his mother, on and off, for his entire life. He does not pay rent, nor does he cook for himself or do his own laundry. He doesn't shovel snow or mow the lawn: in other words, the only thing he contributes is his presence and his mother acknowledges this. He is, naturally, a single man. He is exactly the kind of person who perpetuates the stereotype, and induces a reaction of "Ew."
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #130
132. stereotype's a good word
My husband lived at home til he was in his late 20's, but he contributed in chores, and even now that he's 30 miles away or so, he still goes out there and does maintenance on their house, they still call him if the garage door breaks or the lawn mower won't start. Lord knows he does more work around our house than me, and I left home when I was 16.

My ex moved back with his parents when we split up. He sort of mooched off them financially, no doubt about that. But when his father was dying of cancer, he was the main care taker. And when his mother had a heart attack, he was the one who bathed her and fed her and all, and rather than putting either of them in a hospital or hospice for someone else to do all the unglamorous work that goes with caring for a dying person, he did that himself.

Another of my good friends cared for his father in law when he was dealing with cancer.

When it comes to stereotypes, I think the tendency is to notice the people that confirm the stereotype, and look right past all the ones who contradict it. I don't know why that is, maybe our brains look to reinforce what they already know - certain pathways are etched in our brains, and each new thing that follows that pathway etches it in a bit further, like a river carving a little canyon in our heads.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #132
154. Your last paragraph is such a fine description of our
perceptions. Exactly right.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #130
137. The personal ad on Yahoo that I used back in 1999 was "Walking social stigma"
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 02:22 PM by Pushed To The Left
I wanted to get the living at home thing out of the way so I could avoid shallow women who would see me as a loser. The ironic thing is, the woman that answered that ad went from being open-minded to being one of the most judgmental people I have ever known. Yes, this is the ex-fiance that dumped me over the phone by telling me she had been seeing somebody else and calling me a "pathetic loser". She and her family thought I was a loser, even though she lived at home and was older than I was! She paid a lot less in rent than I do, and was actually unemployed for the first 2 years that I knew her! But her feeling at the end of the relationship was that it was okay for women to live at home, but not okay for a man to live at home. She saw how I went to lots of night classes, tried to find a higher-paying job, and worked hard and got a Bachelor's Degree, but in the end she still ended up looking down on me for not being successful enough and for living at home.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #137
144. I was going to post something about that
before you brought it up, but decided against it, because I'm always going on about gender issues, it seems. :)

But yes, I think there is more of a stigma related to men living at home, because we've (as a culture) got the idea that women kind of naturally fall into family nurturing roles. So adult women who live with their parents might be considered less independent, but their femininity isn't called into question, whereas men who live in multigenerational homes are marked as less masculine.

It's the flip side of the custody battles, where men who don't have full custody of their kids - who see them on weekends - are considered normal, but if a woman doesn't have custody of her kids, it's assumed she was probably unfit in some way.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:04 PM
Response to Reply #144
153. I wonder what the female equivalent of a man who lives at home is when it comes to dating?
What women have as hard of a time getting a date with men as men who live at home do with women? Maybe there is no equivalent, because women tend to get dates pretty easily!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:28 PM
Response to Reply #137
156. Was she afraid that if she stayed with you she'd end up
living with your parents as well? It's possible; it happened to me and I hated it. However she sounds like a woman who is looking for a caretaker and not a partner. There are lots of those people out there and it's best to avoid them because you will be judged by what/how you provide and not for the other qualities that make you, you.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:06 PM
Response to Reply #156
164. No. Our plan was to move in together after the wedding, possibly going out of state
where the cost of living was cheaper. Together, my ex-fiance and I probably made enough money to afford an apartment, and when we broke up I was about to get my degree which I knew would lead to more money in the coming years. Living at home is not the only thing that is unusual about me, and my ex-fiance pretty much picked apart and criticized everything about me at times. She was like Jekyll and Hyde: sweet and supportive half the time, and vicious and unsupportive the other half of the time. Spent seven years with her, and now I'm an old guy who lives at home rather than a young guy! I've considered not even trying to date again until I'm making more money and am on my own so I won't have to deal with all this again. But then part of me wants to find somebody who accepts me for who I am while I'm in the "loser" stage, because I would know she was extremely special!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:51 PM
Response to Reply #164
169. I believe that on some level women are trained to look for a man
who has at least the potential to succeed because motherhood can and often does have an effect on her ability to contribute financially to the household. Our society has a LONG way to go in terms of accommodating the needs of working mothers and their children. I know when I was younger I would not have considered marrying (dating, yes, but not marrying) a man who didn't have all his shit together. Many years later I don't feel the same way but that's because my circumstances have changed. I'm not defending your ex, rather just thinking about what causes women to choose security, even at the expense of love. It's not just a love of diamonds!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
S n o w b a l l Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:28 PM
Response to Reply #121
129. It is about independence...
Living with roommates is not the same as living with family. You are equals and responsible for yourself and don't have the family expectations and rules placed on you that are inevitable when you live with family.

I respect independence and individuality. When you look at the other cultures you're talking about, also look at the lack of freedom to be who they want, marry who they want, express themselves freely and are usually tied to the family for life. That's not a culture I wish to be a part of. I value my independence too much.

I left home when I was 17 & eventually moved 2,000 miles away from my family so I'm a little biased I guess. I can't help it, I see it as a sign of weakness to be dependent on your parents. That's a prejudice I have and I doubt I will ever change.

I would rather date a man with no money living in a trailer than one who has money and lives with his parents. I would respect them more for trying.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:50 PM
Response to Reply #129
134. I've linked this before, but it seems to fit here.
(snip)

From a very young age, we train our children to break bonds with their parents. Children who sleep with their parents are spoiled, parents who allow this to happen have no discipline; we are given advice by professionals on how to train children to fall asleep in cribs in their own rooms, and how important it is not to give in to their "demands" to sleep side by side with their parents. The goal is to create self-reliant independent adults, and we begin this process almost as soon as a child is born. In other cultures, children are wrapped or slung against their parents' bodies as they go about their daily business. We use baby strollers instead of slings, so that instead of feeling our bodies, children feel the bumps of cement sidewalks through a plastic or metal frame. We put them into plastic baby carriers, holding our children at arm's length by a handle. I'm not convinced that babies are supposed to come with carrying handles, even if it is more convenient.

The thing about using a sling is that a baby feels the parent breathing, feels their heartbeat, and moves when their body moves. They feel and share the rhythm of our steps as we walk. As parents, we in turn do the same. When a child in a sling shifts their weight, the parent naturally shifts to maintain balance. Instead of fostering independence, it fosters interdependence, or human connections.

I look at photos of people marching in support of Chavez, or of the people in Oaxaca rising up as one entity against oppression, and I wonder why we can't do that here, why the immigrants marched in our country with a common purpose this year, but we as a nation couldn't or wouldn't rise up as one when the government failed the people of the Gulf Coast.

Then I look at photos of us with our children, and I think I get it.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/stan-goff/containment-and-diplomacy_b_35509.html
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:53 PM
Response to Reply #109
136. Trust me, there's a voice in my head calling them a lot worse than that!
If they see me as a loser because I can't afford rent (though I do pay a version of it here)and live at home, then I see them as judgmental, small-minded,arrogant and ignorant. Unfortunately, those people might be in the majority.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
S n o w b a l l Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #136
140. That's probably what
Paris Hilton thinks too. That may seem like a bad analogy, but at what income level does it become ok to live off your parents. People have no problem bashing the rich kids who do it but for us normal people it's supposed to be seen as communal living and dedication to the family.

There's definitely bias against it in our society. At least I'm not being a hypocrite.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:07 PM
Response to Reply #140
141. Paris Hilton thinks that it's wrong to call men who live at home losers? I'd have a new
respect for her if she said something like that. However, I don't think rich people who inherit money have the same social stigma that somebody in my situation does. In terms of dating, most women (as you pointed out) would see me as a loser and wouldn't want to date me. A millionaire who inherited his wealth and never had to work a day in his life probably couldn't keep most women off of him!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dastard Stepchild Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:00 PM
Response to Reply #78
124. I'm always sad to see this as an embarrassment...
Though I understand why you feel this way. My family is influenced by my mother's Sicilian side, and my husband and I lived with my parents until I was in my late 20s. Then we lived with his when we had to move to their state. I didn't actually rent my own apartment until I was, eh, nearly 29. :)

I would move back to live with my parents in a heartbeat. In fact, my hope is that they can relocate here in a few years, and that we can go half and half on a two-flat. But I remember getting some looks and some comments when I would mention my living situation in the past. Not from everyone, mind you, but certainly from some folks that believed a married couple should have their own place. Why? My parents are awesome and we all got along really, really well together. And we saved a ton on rent. What's not to love about that?


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:30 PM
Response to Reply #124
165. My situation embarasses me because of how society seems to view it
I personally don't think it makes me a bad person, but I feel like I'm in the minority when it comes to that viewpoint. I listen to talk shows where they have entire hours devoted to bashing people in my situation, calling us "losers", "adultolescents" and other things.

If you, your husband, and your parents were happy and got along, then I don't see anything wrong with that living arrangement! My sister's husband is actually building a house next to his parents' house where he and my sister will be living eventually. I sometimes joke that I'm going to come to that house and say, in a Brad Garrett voice, "Everybody loves Raymond!"
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dastard Stepchild Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:43 PM
Response to Reply #165
166. lol...
Let's hope that, for your sister's sake, her mother-in-law is NOTHING like Marie. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:47 PM
Response to Reply #166
168. No. Her in-laws are incredibly nice people.
It seems like they are always smiling!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dastard Stepchild Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Feb-19-07 02:36 AM
Response to Reply #168
182. phew!
I lucked out as well. Mine are quite lovely people, too.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ganeshji Donating Member (401 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:38 AM
Response to Original message
81. Mine is gross.
I bite my nails. Only on one hand so it looks ridiculous. It's a disgusting habit and I wish I could just quit doing it. I had an easier time giving up smoking than quitting chewing on my nails.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:02 AM
Response to Reply #81
92. I did that when I was young but when long, polished nails
came into fashion I found a reason to quit. So, even imagining that there are little roundworm or tapeworm eggs under your nails doesn't help you? :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ganeshji Donating Member (401 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #92
100. It helps when I think of it.
Most of the time, I find myself doing it unconsciously. When I realize that I'm doing it, I'm always grossed out.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
zanne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:59 AM
Response to Original message
91. I perspire if it's over 70 degrees.
I've been to many doctors. There's nothing I can do about it. Actually, on some days I perspire if it's over 65 degrees. There's no odor or anything, but it's pretty strange to see a person sweating when everybody else is wearing a sweater. I carry around a ton of tissues to wipe my face. Sometimes, I just don't want to leave the house, but I have to remind myself that I only have one life, and I better live it. I've had this problem for about 20 years now. In all that time, I've only met one other person with a similar problem.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:05 AM
Response to Reply #91
93. Do you feel hot, or is it just perspiration?
That is a difficult one to deal with. Imagine if you were one of those unfortunates who does have the body odor they can't control... that would be much worse. :hug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
zanne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:19 AM
Response to Reply #93
94. Yes, I'm very heat-sensitive.
The latest medical theory is that it's a neurological problem, something that has to do with some neuropathy in my lower legs. It's not so bad in the winter; I can always open a window. But in the summer, I take two or three showers a day because I just feel so crummy. Thank God there's no odor.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:28 AM
Response to Reply #94
96. You could always move to Maine. There are only three months
of the year you'd have to worry about. I was just thinking whether I would find it odd or disturbing if I met somebody with the problem you describe. I know I'd notice it, but it would be a non-issue.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
zanne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:09 PM
Response to Reply #96
127. I don't have to move to Maine...
I live in New Hampshire!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:31 PM
Response to Reply #127
131. Oh!
I didn't check. Sorry about that :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
QMPMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:21 AM
Response to Original message
95. Yes, and it's a secret.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:29 AM
Response to Reply #95
97. How many people know your secret? n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pierre.Suave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:37 AM
Response to Original message
101. No
I am perfect in every way...


























and if you believe that, I got a nice bridge to sell you...
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:41 AM
Response to Reply #101
104. I do know you are the perfect giver of Valentine's Day gifts.
That will make up for a lot of small foibles. :hi:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pierre.Suave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:24 AM
Response to Reply #104
108. Not only that
Edited on Sun Feb-18-07 11:25 AM by jasonc
I DROVE to MICHIGAN to see her for the weekend, and then, when I found out she was sick, I stayed and took care of her.




am I a nice guy or what...
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:28 AM
Response to Reply #108
110. Totally a nice guy.
I'm looking for one just like you. :hi:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pierre.Suave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #110
116. I hope you find one
cause everyone deserves to be loved.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 10:42 AM
Response to Original message
105. I have nervous laughter
Not all the time, but I catch myself doing it and must seem that I am being really inappropriated when I do it. "We have a serious problem..." chuckle, chuckle.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:33 AM
Response to Reply #105
112. Do you laugh when people injure themselves?
I'm laughing just thinking about it, which is sick. :rofl: I also laughed through much of my wedding ceremony but so did all my sisters, my mother and my father.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #112
115. Sometimes
Espeically when the situation seems like it is straight out of a movie comedy.
I even laughed at myself getting injured when I fell twice in a row on the "Home Alone" steps to an apartment when I was delivering papers as a teen right after a ice/snow storm.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:09 PM
Response to Reply #115
117. I almost died of suppressed laughter when my grandmother
stepped on a salamander and slipped, cutting the little creature in half in a very dramatic fall. It must be a normal way to relieve tension, eh?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dastard Stepchild Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:02 PM
Response to Reply #105
126. This is mine, too...
I laugh more when I am nervous than when I am in a generally jovial mood. Which I wish I didn't do, because I am always worried that it makes me look insincere or immature or ditzy. And I wouldn't mind if it was a slight chuckle, but I kind of guffaw.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
William Bloode Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 11:59 AM
Response to Original message
114. Fat mouth, bad temper, and a junky.
I like takin' trash, and inciting shock to folks in person. I also lack that little voice telling you to shut up. I have a even temper, and slow to anger. I can take a lot of abuse, and laugh at most of it. However when i do get mad, it's explosive. I'm also a junky who goes through 150-200mg of morphine a day. I'm a medically approved junky, but public pressure makes me ashamed sometimes.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #114
118. Public opposition to adequate pain relief really pisses me off.
Why do you like to shock people? I'm just curious. I'll say just about anything too, but it's because I don't care and not because I wish to shock.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
William Bloode Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:39 PM
Response to Reply #118
122. I think it started the same way for me.
At first i did not give a flying fuck. Then i saw i could use it to aggitate overly tight assed people. I like to be in a crowd, and say things that make others cringe. It's kinda my way of sizing up folks up. I like other outrageous people, so this kinda helps thin the herd.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mvd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 12:31 PM
Response to Original message
120. I pick my nails and am..
shy with strangers.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
philosophie_en_rose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:02 PM
Response to Original message
125. I am not a graceful swan.
bump

drop

crash

splat
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
AlCzervik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:46 PM
Response to Reply #125
133. me either and unfortunately for my daughter she has inherited my lack of
grace with my husbands lack of coordination.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
applegrove Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
135. I can't tell a good story.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:37 PM
Response to Reply #135
162. Why, exactly? I have the same problem
and it's because I fear being boring.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
applegrove Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:59 PM
Response to Reply #162
163. I just can't unless I'm with someone really bubbly. I need an active listener to help me along.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:43 PM
Response to Original message
138. I chew my toenails and constantly lick my eyebrows
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #138
160. I could chew my toenails if I were so inclined, but I need to
see some evidence that you are capable of licking your eyebrows. Unless what you mean is that you spit on your hands and then groom yourself, like my cat.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:45 PM
Response to Reply #160
167. Because of you and Rabrrrr's posts, I just put my toes in my mouth
just to see if I was still flexible enough to do it!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:52 PM
Response to Reply #167
170. LOL!
Do you feel a certain satisfaction knowing you're still able? I know I do! :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Pushed To The Left Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 07:57 PM
Response to Reply #170
171. Actually, I sort of enjoyed it.
Okay,now everybody KNOWS I'm weird!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Evergreen Emerald Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 02:45 PM
Response to Original message
139. I always tell people to go F* themselves.
just kidding....but I feel like it!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:36 PM
Response to Reply #139
161. That's a pretty common problem.
:rofl:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:22 PM
Response to Original message
146. Lisa Sure Is Nosy
ever notice that?

I mean she wants to know what habit or characteristic embarrasses us, even tricks me into spilling

But did she ever admit any herself?

"Lisa wants to know what it is"

Nosy nosy nosy

She's sitting around reading these going

Neener Neener Neener

I got them all to tell me!

:rofl:

:hi: Lisa

only foolin'!

:loveya:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:31 PM
Response to Reply #146
157. You'd better be or I'm gonna come Whup Your Ass!
I have tons of foibles and a bunch of them have been mentioned: I talk to myself, asking and answering questions. I also sing constantly when I think I'm alone and it isn't pretty. Social situations where there are people of higher social status than I am, paralyze me. I tend to blurt things out on impulse and regret them later. I'm hyper-concerned about how people perceive me physically, but outside of the physical, my ego is waaaaay too intact.

I'm fucked up, sweetie. Oh, and I swear constantly.

Are we even? :P
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #157
159. ...
are we even?

:shrug:

I can't tell from here

move to your left

okay, now we're even

:crazy:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
martymar64 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:23 PM
Response to Original message
147. I'm a chicken around women I'm attracted to
If I'm not attracted to someone, I'm totally open and charming but when encountered with a woman thats attracts me, I clam up. It's very embarassing and frustrating for me. It's like on some subconscious level I don't feel worthy of being loved. As a result, I've had very few relationships and when I do they are few and far between, and only when they are initiated by her. I've been trying to reverse that, but it is a habit that is deeply ingrained.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 03:41 PM
Response to Reply #147
150. Wow, I Can Relate
to that

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
dysfunctional press Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:27 PM
Response to Original message
155. sometimes i'm embarrassed by how intelligent i am...
that and my excessive humility.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 06:33 PM
Response to Reply #155
158. Don't worry about that.
You are a shining beacon of humility and your wit and wisdom are renowned. hehe.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:07 PM
Response to Original message
172. I'm very awkward
physically and socially. :shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:42 PM
Response to Reply #172
174. Is it a matter of confidence? If it is, you'll get past it socially
though I'm not positive about physically. You may feel more awkward than you appear to others.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:45 PM
Response to Original message
175. YES! I have this one quirk that
prevents me from discussing my personal characteristics with strangers.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
crim son Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 08:57 PM
Response to Reply #175
176. Fair enough.
I think that's a common one too. :)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:00 PM
Response to Reply #176
177. it's embarrassing
to have such a weird quirk . . .

wait a minute, if I just disclosed that my quirk is that I can't disclose my quirk . . .

my head hurts
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
GenDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:22 PM
Response to Original message
178. I'm afraid that I come across ignorant or unintelligent
and when I need to be the most articulate -- I choke. An example of this -- on Thursday when I called my congressman's office to complain about his floor speech (which was in total opposition of the Democratic resolution)I found myself getting all tongue tied and blubbery.
I have a hard time verbalizing my thoughts in a concise, coherent way, and I'm really afraid that I sound stupid. I'm also redundant.:blush:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mitchum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-18-07 09:49 PM
Response to Original message
180. I lash out in sardonic veral anger, but I doub't that's new;s to anyone here
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Evoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Feb-19-07 03:16 AM
Response to Original message
184. Only one that really bothers me.
I'm the kind of guy who's got his emotions completely under control. I'm also naturally secretive, and I never tell people more than I have to. I can also be quite sly and occasionally manipulative when its warranted.

Thats all background for my flaw..you'll see why it bother me so much. Ahem..anyways, occasionally I start daydreaming or I'll be thinking about a past situation. I get so caught up in my daydream that I will all of a sudden say something absurdly stupid, or something I DON'T want someone else to know.

Example? I was on a date with this girl...and we were driving to a pool hall after we went out for dinner (she was driving)...and I started thinking about a date I had earlier, and how it had been a disaster (not my fault though lol). So I said out loud..."Ugh..horrible date". You can imagine how well that went over with the girl, huh? It also used to happen in elementary school too..I would say something out loud when the entire class was quiet.

I've since stopped doing it so much, but it's taken concentration.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Sun May 05th 2024, 10:12 PM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC