Do you have a personal quality/characteristic/habit that embarrasses even you?

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From a very young age, we train our children to break bonds with their parents. Children who sleep with their parents are spoiled, parents who allow this to happen have no discipline; we are given advice by professionals on how to train children to fall asleep in cribs in their own rooms, and how important it is not to give in to their "demands" to sleep side by side with their parents. The goal is to create self-reliant independent adults, and we begin this process almost as soon as a child is born. In other cultures, children are wrapped or slung against their parents' bodies as they go about their daily business. We use baby strollers instead of slings, so that instead of feeling our bodies, children feel the bumps of cement sidewalks through a plastic or metal frame. We put them into plastic baby carriers, holding our children at arm's length by a handle. I'm not convinced that babies are supposed to come with carrying handles, even if it is more convenient.

The thing about using a sling is that a baby feels the parent breathing, feels their heartbeat, and moves when their body moves. They feel and share the rhythm of our steps as we walk. As parents, we in turn do the same. When a child in a sling shifts their weight, the parent naturally shifts to maintain balance. Instead of fostering independence, it fosters interdependence, or human connections.

I look at photos of people marching in support of Chavez, or of the people in Oaxaca rising up as one entity against oppression, and I wonder why we can't do that here, why the immigrants marched in our country with a common purpose this year, but we as a nation couldn't or wouldn't rise up as one when the government failed the people of the Gulf Coast.

Then I look at photos of us with our children, and I think I get it.