Anna Nicole’s body lands endorsement deal for diet regimen

New York Times
February 28, 2007

A spokesperson for Anna Nicole’s estate announced today that Anna Nicole’s corpse had accepted a lucrative endorsement deal for a controversial weight-loss system.

The deceased celebrity will be featured in ads with the slogan "Forget Trim-Spa®, baby! Try Death®!"

Officials at Death® were reportedly delighted to have Anna Nicole’s corpse sign on as the face and body of Death®. An unnamed Death® spokesman called Anna Nicole’s demise “timely, and a win-win for all.”

Famed Hollywood style guru Rachel Zoe is excited about the new Death® diet regimen and intends to recommend it to her clients. "This is definitely the culmination of a fashion trend," Zoe said. "Skeletal is the way to go. Bulimia can only take you so far, you know. So far, we’ve focused on eliminating every speck of body fat. But to be truly fashionable, you need to get rid of that troublesome flesh and muscle as well."

The announcement has already created a positive buzz in the fashion industry. "Everyone knows the clothing of all the top designers is designed to be worn by skeletons," said Gerard LeBeau, designer for Chanel.

But isn’t it wrong to encourage women to resort to decomposition to lose weight?

LeBeau believes the trend is a necessity in the high pressure world of haute couture. "Designers prefer skeletons on the runway because clothes just naturally hang better on skeletons. We can’t very well have breasts and derrieres causing unsightly lumps in our clothing."

With Anna Nicole’s body on board, Death® is poised to become the next big trend in Hollywood. Both Nicole Ritchie and Lindsay Lohan have expressed interest in starting the Death® regimen. Some anonymous sources have said that Paris Hilton has already been on the plan for several years now.

More:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/28/style/anna_nicole/28death.html?ref=diet

Finally, a permanent weight loss program!