So basically, I'm pretty much F*cked

We put our house on the market AGAIN. 6 months last year without even an offer. We tried again starting last week and we've had showings every day and now have an offer tonight that is LESS THAN WE OWE. We countered but even if they accept, it will still be less than break even. And we can't cover the escroe on the taxes either. So...

We lose the house or sell at a loss.

We owe the state big tax money, and do not have it.

Our credit is fucked, and we owe everybody.

In 40 days I am going to be homeless.

I can't even get drunk and forget (not that I want to, mind you, but damn...)

I get to pay 25% of my salary to my wife in child support (which is no problem, as I actually offered to pay more than a judge would deem fair).

My retirement fund is depleted. My savings are depleted. My soul is depleted. And my heart aches...

:cry:

So if anyone wants to put me up for a while, I can cook and clean, I'm pretty handy, I like to cuddle, and I come with 30,000 books...

RL

p.s. I refuse to give up. There WILL come a day when this is all a memory I can laugh at... right?

pay for ramen and such, come here...we'll be nice and make you feel at home :hug:

:loveya:

:loveya:

RL

Seriously.

:hi:

thanks... :hug:

RL

:rofl:

RL

leather pants. check.
tattoos. check.
piercings. check.
spikey funky hair. check.
attitude. check.
bad boy 'tude. check.

Yup, we'll have fun... :evilgrin:

RL

I look hot in mascara... used to wear it on stage...

RL

Sparkle eye shadow on special occasions.

but I'm willing...

:D

RL

:shrug:

RL

:rofl:

RL

Everyone wants to join our sick little party.

:rofl:

RL

wrong place...

RL

oops

I wish I could help you somehow.

:hug:

:shrug:

:hug:

RL

There are no jobs here. But you can live cheap if you live in the city.

:D

RL

Pittsburgh is dirt cheap, you can sleep in Dropkid's bed, god knows she never does. And guess what? It has a slide!!!! It's this bed without the princess stuff



:hug:

slide and all...

:hi:

RL

I'm your real estate huckleberry.

Why is it "we" first of all?

Must you sell? You speak of losing the house. Are you in f/c? If so, there are sooooooo many ways out of it. Drop me a PM and let's talk about Loss Mitigation. You'd be surprised. We can get on the phone and hash this out. You can have my number.

Tax money? Property taxes? Okay...that's all part of closing costs. The buyer should know this.

You've got a spot in Tampa. You'll never be homeless. Caveat: if my pitbulls eat your books, you CAN'T sue me.

Aaahhh, Retro, if there's ever been a time that I could ever help you, you know I would and will.

Worst case scenario...depending upon your state, I could help you tie your bank up for 4-6 years if they came after your house.

Damn, but I KNEW that 10 years in the ugly side of the biz would someday yin to the yang.

at least not yet. Late with payment every month, other bills piling up. We countered and will find out tonight. We may end up breaking even if they accept what we came up with.

Maybe I'm just being a drama queen...

thanks

:hi:

RL

Sorry, man. Hang in there. It's gotta get better some time.

:hug:

:hi:

RL

:hug: I wish there was something more I could do besides light a candle and pray to Whomever. You are always welcome at my place and I won't exact payment in the form of cuddles or anything else.

Sending all the vibes I've got, because you're in a worse situation than I am. :hug: :hug: :hug:

hell I'd put you up here, you could stay on the couch or be my roommate ;)

I need someone to cook and clean, and ehh, forget the cuddles, and 30K books, sure thing... we'll just fill up the garage eh?

I'm sorry you are in such a sucky situation man...

there will come a day when this is all a memory... and you might even laugh... that may take longer!

:hug:

:hi:

I wish there was something I could do besides pray and send white light but I will do those and keep my fingers crossed that good tidings come your way soon. :hug: :hug: :hug:

There WILL come a day when this is all a memory I can laugh at... right?

you must know that this is never guaranteed, there are good people who die never having had anything of life

self-employment sucks, i'm sorry i wasn't supportive of the bookstore idea but it was for this very reason, self-employment does not work in today's economic reality

if there is some way to sell the 30,000 books?

that's what he needs to hear right now. :eyes:

but i'm flabbergasted what i can say that would actually be helpful

telling the guy the sun will rise in the east whether or not he survives is just more maddening, isn't it?

at least it is when it's done to me

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

Yes, you have my permission to copy and paste it. Or you can change to "best of luck" or even, get this, "that's too bad. good luck". There are enough people ready to say "told you so life is hard and then you die" that we don't need more. Best of luck with that.

Instead of peeing in his cheerios.

She could have accused him of making it all up.

This is the MO of this particular poster.

Shit, I'm a newb, and I have more decorum than that.

The bookstore is a sideline right now.

But I understand your point...

RL

and i've never missed a rent payment, but there are lots of factors that can influence a person's success or failure in business.

I'm genuinely curious. Does it make you happy to spread negativity everywhere you go? Do you find that you receive happy vibes back from the universe, or do you get back what you put out?

Seriously, and I'm not stalking you, or even angry. But every time I read a post that is so negative, so wrong-headed, that I just shake my head, it's you. What IS that?

with you, isn't it? Keep it up, you still have a lot of work to do.

with only a few thousand in savings. Today, 10 years from the day I started out of a spare bedroom in my parents house, I stand here owning my own home, having two paid-off cars, and an income well over $300,000 annually. My boyfriend started his company at 19 and today is a successful web programmer/graphic artist/communications guru with two studios and several employees. All it takes is a dream, determination, and sacrifice. Retro is off to a good start and we all should be supportive of his endeavor. He doesn't need, nor deserve your comments.

There are many people who own their own business today and do well and live well.

I hope someday you look back at all this and think that this was the uncomfortable period after which everything started working out beautifully.

I'm sorry. I wish there were more than words. :hug:

:hug:

RL

:hug:

I am so sorry........

I am keeping you in my heart...... :hug:

You have many people here that can offer moral (and actual) support :hug:

There's always the lotto! And books, books are good, they fill the soul right back up when you're down.

http://www.amazon.com/Scripture-Golden-Eternity-Lights-Pocket/dp/0872862917/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-2405329-2221408?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1173936322&sr=8-1

:o

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

when you don't have anything nice to say?

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

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Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

I just filed bankruptcy. That pound of flesh they take doesn't hurt as much as my craniotomy did.

:toast:

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

I've been there

I don't know if I have room for all your books . . .

I haven't paid attention to the bookstore saga, and I'm sorry about that. Did you have any luck on eBay or ABE books? Are the remaining books mostly modern? Are they listed somewhere? Gee, if you sold the whole lot for fifty cents each, that would raise $15,000. Is that possible?

I'm sure you've thought of every possibility, and I apologize if our comments are just irritants at this point.

Our thoughts are with you. Tell us how to help.

:hug:

just know-you are not a loser-it took me awhile to realize that myself(and yes....I am also drunk-forgive any misspellings)

It sounds like flvegan might be able to offer some good, concrete advice; I hope you take him up on his offer.

As for me, I'm in a shit situation myself right now, so can't offer anything of substance to help you out, but I do offer you hugs, good thoughts, and a shoulder to lean on.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :loveya:

Don't look at it as a bad ending- look at it as an opportunity to make a new beginning. Keep your eyes and mind open, and something will present itself when you least expect it.

I can say it because I went through somewhat the same thing- down to nothing with no prospects for a job and no hope for a good future. Now I own a small business and make enough to pay the rent and have the occasional good meal.

Things work out. Believe it.

I hope the day you are laughing at this memory comes soon. :hug:

P.S. I wish I lived close enough to put your "I like to cuddle" claim to a test. :evilgrin:

...but Spain is a looooonnnnng way away from where you are, and the Euro exchange rate would kill you.

I hope things will be looking up ...

...sorry man.

With all the pressure you're under, the last thing you need is a person to exacerbate your anxieties. My statements had nothing to do with you; they only had to do with my experiences.

I wish you nothing but good experiences for yourself & your family. I was being an asshole for presuming I knew something I had no right to.

All the best to you RetroLounge.


Sorry.

I withdraw my comments upthread.

:hug: :hug: There are elements of what you're going through that I understand all too well. :pals: If you lived in NC, you could crash in our guest room. You might wake up to my dogs jumping on you, but they're friendly. :)

I know things will work out. :) Hang in there.

if you wanna come to cali you can.

and you have plenty of moral support from all over.

take care of yourself, dude.

:hug:

My father lost his home, his job and wound up as a telephone research employee after a career spent at Schlitz as a white collar executive. He built himself back at the age of 52. You can do it. You are not alone. :hug:

Much love,

Laura

:(

I hope you get a better offer. I hope you find a way out of all that debt. :hug:

to hear of your problems. Stuff like this should not happen to good people. All I can offer you is my support and strength. You and your family are in my prayers, and I hope that all works out in the end.

I don't know what else to tell you other than hang in there, and you're in my thoughts. You will get through it. :hug:

I'm glad you're hanging in there. My MIL lost her house. She is doing better now. The house
was actually more of a drain than it was worth. I know that may sound stupid, but things might end up BETTER
once you let go of the outcome and ride with it.
Good luck! :hug:

Good people like you don't deserve this kind of shit.

I wish I could make all of this bad stuff go away. If I had the power to do so, I'd do it.

You're one of my favorite people around here. You're one of the good ones.

I do hope all gets better for you soon.

Take care, my friend.

:hug:

Terry

Wish I could help...but others here can do more than I. Sounds like flvegan's got your back. Don't give up - you have it in you to get through this. :hug: :pals:

I was so close to being where you are and still owe taxes and am in debt so deep it makes me crazy to think about it. I've always got an extra room and the books? I don't think the damp garage would be a good place.

You *will* get through this and eventually, the financial side will even out. You haven't failed. Your life took unexpected turns and now you're doing your best to survive.

Hang in there. For your kids, but mostly for yourself.

I'm always here for you friend.

:pals:

Remember the old saying about "It's always darkest just before dawn". It's true. No matter what else happens, you have good friends...great kids...and lots of books! Sending you the best of vibes.

:hug:

As hard as life is treating you now, it will all be a memory one day, and you'll and your children will be stronger for it. :hug:

You know why? Because you're nice and kind. This kind of thing tends to come back to us in our hour of need. It's just the way the world works. Hell, I'd host you in MY house were you willing to relocate to Brazil. (Yeah, I knwow, you have kids so it's unlikely)

The cooking and the books are just a nice bonus. The cuddling I could do without.

Hey, I'm looking at your books, and promise to pick something to buy.

We should have a DU book-buying spree for you!

and do you have to take this offer on your home? I know you're probably scared no one will offer more due to your prior experience but maybe you could wait a bit and see if you can get closer to your asking price. Get that Realtor to be very aggressive. Hell, offer them extra commission or something if the can sell it in a shorter time for more $$$.

That well and truly sucks. I wish I had something better to offer you than my firm belief that you will endure and come out of this on the other side. :hug: :thumbsup:

except

1) I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time, and

2) Almost everything can be fixed. Sure, things can take time, but there's very little that you can do that can't be undone.


:hug:

thought of.

Have you considered finding a business partner and opening a mortar/bricks store? It seems to me that you have a couple of pretty valuable assets to work with here: your inventory, a great personality, and a willingness to work to follow your dream.

What you really need is someone who has the money to lease a storefront in a viable location. As the economy is getting worse, Stephanie and I have noticed that here in NC, the crowds at Barnes and Nobles are drinking coffee and reading magazines (for free)..while there are lines at the register at EVERY used bookstore we have been in.

:hi:

RL

If you're lucky enough to live in a town where there's a lot of wealth, there are often people who want to and enjoy backing entrepreneurs in partnerships.

It seems to me that they would be better off that way than taking the house back. A cheap apartment for a couple of years, storage unit for the books.
I would accept their offer, it seems to me the inventory of homes is just going to rise over the next year.

Although I've been self-employed for 13 years and have never missed a rent payment, there have been some seriously scary times, like when the customer who provided half my income went out of business. My checking account was once so depleted that when AT&T offered me $100 to change my long-distance service, I did it.

As I've listened to stories of people who've been self-employed (not motivational speakers, but real people), they've all had scary times, and all have come through somehow. Maybe not in the way they had imagined, but they've come through it.

Take a deep breath, consider your situation realistically, and definitely consider suggestions from some of the knowledgeable people upthread who have offered to help you.

In the meantime, :hug:

and be proud that you made it through this period. Just don't give up.

Faith is not simply a patience that passively suffers until the storm is past. Rather, it is a spirit that bears things - with resignations, yes, but above all, with blazing, serene hope. ~ Corazon C. Aquino

:hug:

:hug:

RL

I've never heard of a house going for less than you paid for it. What's the matter with our country. Why so many books? I moved from L.A. and gave some away which I regret but where would I have put them? I sure hope you don't go homeless. I hate people who hate homeless people. Hang in there.

I've got a spare sofa and I'm sure we could find room for the books. :hi:

On another note, it absolutely boggles my mind that in a thread like this, there are so many deleted messages. What is wrong with people? :wtf:

oh, and lots and lots of :hug: :hug: :hug: . Oh, and good good vibes. Hang in there, RetroLounge.

and get thee to a good financial adviser...they may help you see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I was hoping things were getting better.

I'm not that far from you - you could stay here if push comes to shove. It's insane here and you should really like dogs (3, 1 cat, 2 birds and a couple of fish!) - but I've got a big basement where you could probably stash the books if you had to (& helped me rearrang the junk that's already down there. :) oh yea - AND- I would get to read them if wanted to, right?)

Of course *my* situation isn't much better than yours lately and the possibility exists that it - scarily - could become even *more* like yours (house/$$/etc...) but for the nonce - I do have a roof over my head.

It sounds like flvegan has some good ideas, though - maybe he can help you out.

Also - houses sell better in the spring/summer, don't they? Can you 'do' something to help sell the house? You know those shows where they do some sprucing up here and there, etc..... would something like that help? There are plenty of DU'ers who are diy'ers - they could at least give advice. We could have a DU 'paint your house' party if that would help.

Don't despair. I think you're just depressed because you haven't been spending much time with us lately. ;)

Hope this :hug: helps at least a little.

:grouphug:

and wish I could help you. You're smart and capable, so you will survive this. Someone mentioned that sometimes people don't come through bad times, but I think that kind of disaster usually only befalls people who have no skills, or have other serious problems that you don't have. So while it's scary and awful right now, you WILL get through it. My husband was homeless about 15 years ago, having been totally screwed by a business partner. He crashed with some friends for a while, and was able to get back on his feet in a few months.

You have a job, so that's a big thing in your favor. flvegan sounds like he has some great advice and skills to help you deal with the debt (believe me, I know whereof you speak). Use all these kind offers of help, and I think you'll be fine.

You WILL come out of this, though there might be a few bad times ahead. Keep your head up and keep talking with your friends here, because we all care about you.

why don't we put together another du local meetup-maybe us locals can hep figure something out

Had a frantic call for a showing this morning and the buyers want to put in a offer BEFORE the other buyer can accept the counter offer.

They are working out the detaails now. If they present us with an offer and we sign and accept BEFORE the other buyer signs the counter, we may end up a few 1000 bucks ahead after all.

How weird would that be?

:shrug:

Never believe Lounge Vibes don't help...

RL

:hug:

Thanks for sharing that, you. I am so happy about this and take it as definitive proof that lounge vibes really do work!

:woohoo:

for what they're worth.

Good luck!

This is the way life works sometimes. I have a good feeling about this.

:yourock: :yourock: :yourock:

On edit: Great news that the purchasers accepted your counter offer.

Good luck on finding a new place and getting ALL those books out of the basement?

and just came back 3-4 months ago.

I came to know your name and always enjoyed your posts. I remember the one where you said you had to leave and didn't know for how long. You didn't say why, but now I understand.

It's all too possible I may be facing a similar challenge myself and I regret, very much, that all I can offer are my sympathy and my hope for you. From your posts you seem to be a good and likable guy. It's clear that you're very much liked around here.

I'm impressed and grateful to the great people here who are capable and willing to offer you some real, concrete, help. Flvegan, in particular, has some help that might even be a solution. I can tell from his posts that he's a good guy too, and has a good heart.

I'm with the others here that are unable to offer more than sincere, heartfelt, good wishes for you.
I'm hoping, confidently hoping, that the very near future is much, much, brighter for you than it is right now. Everybody has a time in their life that is the worst. This is probably your worst. It'll be rough, but you will get through it. Then you can scratch that off the list of things in life that must be endured.

Just remember that the thoughts of many, many, here are with you. And please keep us posted, someone else might come along with an idea or solution. The best of good luck to you RetroLounge.

on edit: I just read your latest posting. You made it while I was writing. That truly is great news. I'm happy for you! I hope it keeps on working out. This is good. :toast:

you have many friends here. Maybe the folks nearer to you could organize a benefit, or something. I suspect you know lots of music, art and book folk - make use of them.

:hug: to you RL

Remember, somehow things always work out.

It maddens my SO to no end, but I'm a firm believer in "it could be worse". He complains about his job (at least he has one), our place is a dump (at least we have a roof over our head), our friends are losers (but they're always there for us)-he's a real glass half-empty person.
You have your kids, your health and your books. Sounds ok to me.;)

The second offer did not materialize, but our original counter offer was accepted and signed.

Worse case scenario avoided, the house is sold, and we will be very close to break even, plus or minus a bit.

Now I begin looking for somewhere to live...

Thanks for the vibes! and the PM's and suggestions.

Now to move on to tackle the taxes and debt, etc...

:hi:

RL

:woohoo:

Hang in there dood :hug:

:bounce::bounce:

:hug:

Any accounting/tax help you need, you've got it - no charge for friends. Just whistle. You know how to whistle don't you? :evilgrin:

:loveya:

I'm so happy about the news!

Good to hear!

:toast:

:hug:

My offer of an ear still stands.

:hug:

:hug:

:hi:

:hug:

:hi:

RL

at a time!

:hug:

hang in there!

:hi:

:toast:

I'm going to keep those vibes coming, as you work on the other issues you have.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :loveya:

tied to the bed?? does she come to?

please smile:hug:

i wish there was something i could do...

must resist getting my own thread locked...

:rofl:

RL

;)

see, you still have your sense of humor and thats something:hug:

What a relief. Too bad you couldn't couch surf here in Idaho. I've often read your daily poem and have been through a couple of divorces myself. It's never easy. Character building, but never easy. Best of luck and good wishes

They say that proper staging can make all the difference.
:P

...she would be properly staged. :9

probably for the first time in years :evilgrin:

RL

I'm thinking of ya.

I'm hopeful that this is the the start of a major upswing for you.

I'll continue sending good vibes your way. I'm digging my way out of debt, too, so I shouldn't be buying books online, but if I have need of reading material I'm going to your website first.

:hi:

from your OP, RL! I hope you can come out of this in much better shape than you imagined.


Sending you lots and lots of good thoughts, vibes and wishes. :hug: :grouphug: :pals: :loveya:

just :hug:

Dessert sure would Help.
I wish I could make that happen for you.
This to shall pass!

I had a co-worker that was a similar situation. I made him write down EVERY DIME he spent every day. He found money because he was wasting it on simple things such as buying video games and eating fast food at lunch.

Good luck to you.

good advice... I can never keep it going...

But I am using quicken now and can track every penny.

:hi:

RL

blaming the victim for these sorts of situations.

Evidence shows, however, that it usually takes only one catastrophic event, like loss of a job or health crisis, that puts people over the edge financially.

You can budget all you like, but if there's not enough money, there's not enough money.

Someday you will look back on this and...well, perhaps you won't laugh, but it will be a distant memory.

Hope things improve quickly for you, and you later realize this was a turning point in your life to get you headed in the right direction for better things.

As soon as I get my new debit card, I am ordering some books from you, my friend.

PM me if you need anything (Not sure if you have my phone number or not, but if you need to talk, I will give you my number!).

:hug:

I promise that the next time I'm looking for a book -- I will hit your store first. In fact, I bookmarked it, and will shop there this weekend.

I sold (mostly books) on ebay about seven or eight years ago. I specialized in children's series books from the 30's through the 60's. Business was great until the big ebay glut hit. I remember selling a first edition (with dust jacket) copy of "Little Black, a Pony" for $60.00 one day, and a few months later I was lucky to get a dollar for the same book. I still have hundreds, maybe thousands, of books in totes sitting in my shed, and a room full at an antique store down the street. For me, the entire antique and collectible business has been real tough the past few years. I've gotten behind on my sales tax before and my instinct is to put it out of my head, and pretend that it will go away. It never does -- but when I talk to the tax people and set up a payment plan it always works out. It is very hard being self-employed.

Listen to good, sound advice -- like so many people have given up thread, and I'm sure that you will weather this storm. Thoughts, prayers, and positive vibes being sent your way!




:hug:

First, :hug:

Second, "So if anyone wants to put me up for a while, I can cook and clean, I'm pretty handy, I like to cuddle, and I come with 30,000 books..."

You got it! :)

I'm sorry you're going through this, RL. That really sucks. I hope that you get a better offer tomorrow! :hug:

I've been there, and got out of it. You can too. But I know how it feels, and it fucking sucks.

I do have one suggestion: how about a great sale of the books? A buck a book is cheaper than most used book stores, and it sounds like you have almost as many books as a lot of them. You may not get rich from it or climb out from under the rock, but it may give you a little breathing room for a while. Anyway, I wish you all the best.

:hi:

RL

I'm sending all my good vibes, prayers and thoughts your way , to help out with the rest.


Edits: trying to get the smileys to work!

I had NO IDEA this was going on!!

:hug::hug::hug:

You know how to reach me if you wanna talk, OK? :hug:

:hug:

RL

You can sleep on the sofa and no doubt be inspected by one of the cats as you sleep. I may have room for the books -- what's a few thousand more?

I'm happy to hear your counter offer was accepted.

What all the DU love flowing your way, aren't you glad you have some options?

I admire your optimistic attitude. :pals:

Don't let the douchebags get you down.

but I'm glad to find a used bookseller. I'll be checking your inventory out tomorrow. Do you by any chance take PayPal?

I hope things start looking up for you soon. And YES I believe there is a time you will look back and well, maybe not laugh, but at least be grateful that you have moved to a better space. I followed my brother to the bank the day he had to turn his truck over after his divorce and it was horrible. BUT he is doing really well now. It took a little time but he got his life back and everything paid off and bought a beautiful home on a mountain top. You will get where you want to be as well.

Would you like for me to put a link to your on line bookstore on my message board?

such information lessens the pain of your situation; I just want to tell you that I survived that pit of horror, and eventually came out of it better off, and that you can too.

You just have to be strong. Do NOT give in to the despair. That may seem to be the easier and more desirable option right now, but you can't do it. You CANNOT.

You will NOT give up.

Redstone

You are an inspiration and I appreciate the kind words.

and like you say, you are one lucky SOB.

I will one day say the same.

:hi:

RL

It's only 'things'...stuff; wood and paper and cloth.

"p.s. I refuse to give up."

Then don't give up! But you do deserve to rant and rave and blow off steam.
It's a hard row you're towing but it'll pass... sooner or later.

"There WILL come a day when this is all a memory I can laugh at... right?"
It will be over, one way or another but they're just things. Baggage. Stuff.
Maybe it's just time to go down a new road and the universe is trying to get your attention?!

Hang in there. It all looks scary right now but you're smart and you will find your way.

30,000 books?? Oh my gravy, as Rachel Ray likes to say! ( I hate that term! lol) Thats a lot of books!

--------------------------------------

:shrug:

I hope things get better for you. :hug:

I hope things get better real soon. I hit rock bottom myself a couple of years ago, both financially and emotionally, and was looking for a way out but couldn't see one.
It's tough.
Hang in there, stick through to the bitter end, don't let it grind you into the pavement.
You have love and support here (from most people).
Where you from? Could you find a friend or DU'er to put you up for awhile?
I know I'd try my best to work something out if you were near me (but I doubt it...I live in the backwoods of eastern new york :P)

Just survive.
And we'll be here every bit of the way, promise.
:hug:
:pals:

And at least they can't take that away.

I really hope everything works out for you. :hug:

I can extend to you RetroLounge

I've read about your various problems over the past year or so and I've felt so sorry for everything you've had to endure. Rest assured you have my very best in terms of thoughts, prayers, best wishes, positive vibes and hugs:grouphug: I hope everything works out for you as soon as possible :hug: