Most devastating childhood punishment.

edit- because I feel it bears discussion, I didn't mean to promote any real childhood trauma on anyone here. I'm talking about those little punishments that seem devastating when you're a kid, but are trivial now.

Wielded by an angry dad.

wielded by an angry mom.

of course it hurt too, but my dad had an awful temper :scared:

the parent's anger--not about anything the child did or didn't do.

still wet from shower/bath!!! That is the worst!!!

I feel for you, but I was kind of hoping to keep a light tone to the thread. I am so sorry.

ouch :cry:

oops

At long last, our savior!

How's that?

Fucker:wow: :grr: :nuke: :grr: :nuke: :grr: :nuke:

I've got yer back, Deep13 :loveya: :hi:

parent. Because you know if you get sent home with a bad note, more often than not dad's gonna kick the shit outta you.

But I'm not bitter. :rofl:

That was the order of the day in my elementary school. Complete humiliation in front of the class. This would include derogatory remarks about looks, intelligence, athletic ability and academic skill.

It was pretty brutal. At my Jr High, the vice priciple had a paddle that he was eager to use. That was preferable to the humiliation.

having to write: "I am a sneak, a cheat and a liar" 10,000 times..all because I wore a boys ring at school for a 5 day period my 7th grade year and my Mom found a note in my purse about it.

My Mother intervened when I reached 3,300 times..saying my Dad's punishment was too much. I was still grounded though.

:mad:

When he had an accident in 1st grade. I felt so horrible for him...as if he wasn't embarrassed enough by what happened. :hug:

was the worst punishment my parents could do to us. We lived in the south (FL and TX) and, since we didn't have oodles of toys and crap, being outside running amok was our favorite thing to do. Being forced to stay in the boring house sucked mightily.

We were very lucky in that they did not believe in corporal punishment, though I have no idea how they managed to resist whacking us, we were beastly children.

If I went home with the class subject incompletely copied, I'd have TV privileges removed.

I forced myself to be able to copy things in time, and my hand HURT from the effort, but my handwriting still sucks just as bad as in those days.

Especially if it was the whole class being punished for just a few kids misbehaving. I still leave work slightly early just about every day - 40 years later - just because I so hate being anywhere I don't want to be for a moment longer than anticipated.

completely flip her lid and go on rampages against everyone in the house. Hitting (with hands, belts, rulers, wooden spoons, Hot Wheels tracks), screaming the most vile threats ("I'm going to cave your stupid face in!"), throwing things (a container full of silverware and knives from the dishwasher, books), kicking in your bedroom door and ransacking your room... these were some of my mom's favorites. My dad simply told us we shouldn't "push her buttons" except that we never knew what would set her off. It changed by the minute.

The weirdest part was that, when she wasn't raging out of control, she was the clingiest, neediest, mushiest baby-woman ever. She constantly wanted love and affection, in fact she demanded it. But what child wants to love or trust a woman who could fly into fits of rage at the drop of a hat?

To this day she still doesn't understand why her children aren't interested in spending much time with her.

I had a bio-so-called-mother exactly like yours. She's dead now and, to be honest, I am not sad about her being gone. I have a wonderful stepmother and my daughter knows nothing about my bio-uterine-donor. My son knows a bit. I won't even visit her grave.

I'm glad you have a nice stepmother now. When did she come into your life? It took me so long to realize that my mom wasn't normal because I never knew any other way. I wonder if some other adult had come around and recognized my mom's behavior for what it was, maybe I could've started the healing process much sooner. In many ways I blame my dad for not stepping in when she lost control. He made us think it all really was our fault.

:hug:

I was 28 - but- I have known her all my life. She was my music teacher in school when I was a kid. She and Dad started datng after bio-so-called-mother died when I was 23.

She is a wonderful, wonderful woman and I am so glad that she and Dad have each other. She's wonderful to me and my kids adore her. She is the only Grandma they have known. My husband proudly tells people that he has the world's best in-laws - and he really means it.

and I'm wondering if your mother might have Borderline Personality Disorder?

I really hate the name of that, btw, because it sounds like "almost" a disorder, when in fact "borderline" means the borderline between psychosis and neurosis, they go back and forth. It's an extremely difficult disorder with no known treatment.

On edit: The lashing out cycled with clinginess/neediness is what made me wonder.

will not get help. We've tried to get her help but to no avail. She's functioning enough that we can't have her committed or anything, so she just continues on her sad journey, spiralling ever downward.

All eleven of us (yes, a woman who had no business raising any children managed to pump out nearly a dozen) talk about how much of a relief it will be when she finally dies. I know it sounds callous and cruel, but she is completely miserable and will not do anything to help herself nor will she accept real help from others. My dad died over seven years ago and she got even worse. It's sad to see someone waste so much of their life.

Anyway, thanks. Borderline Personality Disorder is definitely one I have considered as well. I had a boss once who was diagnosed with this and many of his behavior patterns were similar to my mom's.

if it helps you at all check out this site: http://bpdcentral.com/

There is a message board, and either the stories will ring true (meaning it could have been written by another child of your mother's) or they won't. You'll know right away. Tough stuff to read.

You saying your mom refused help is typical too...it's everyone else who has the problem.

Good luck to you, and I'm sorry for what you went through. Big hugs to you.

On edit, this link is more direct: http://www.borderline-personality-disorder.info/departments/message-board.htm

Mother was unconvinced that *uck was the same as shucks.

That is what we were threatened with as children.

"You kids behave or I'll see to it that you'll LIVE through the accident I'm about to have!"

What kind of sadistic style seat belts did your car come with!?!

didn't require us to wear them...and being restrained like that was the worst thing imaginable. Icouldn't hang over the front seat and talk. :D

my mother would take away my books/tapes...it was agony...but looking back it was rather trivial, but it still upset the hell outta me, :D

my Mother never hit us with it, but she threatened to! That was horrible punishment thinking we were going to get whacked!

No t.v. in there. I thought I was being abused.

shrieking my name, with a bamboo switch in hand. I hid in the bushes down the street and laughed at them with the neighbor kids. Hated it.

Most of the time, mommy. Dad was a reluctant participant. I was the middle child, so I got most of the blame.

Sitting at home with mom while dad and my brothers went off was devastating.

They would take all of my non-school related reading material away. They would box all of my books up and put them in the family room closet where they would knoe if I had tried to get them. I did without extra readng material for one whole semester in high school once. It was horrible.

How as a child if I did something at school that deserved punishment.. I'd storm in the house going, I'm not eating supper, I don't want to watch T.V or go outside, and I'm going to bed early . . confusing my Mom into wondering how the hell she was going to punish me after all.

It often was given to the whole class. The teacher would pick a page of the dictionary--one of those hardcover dictionaries with small print--and make us copy the entire page. Sometimes we had to do it in class, but other times we had to do it at home and bring it in the next morning. Do you know how long it took to do that? The teacher would tell us she would know if we didn't copy the entire page. One time, I guess my class was really acting up (though I can't even imagine what we were doing) and she made us copy 5 pages at home, two nights in a row.

I don't know if it was my school, if it was a popular form of punishment at the time, or both, but all through elementary school it seemed we spent a lot of time writing definitions or sentences for punishment. I didn't get into a lot of trouble personally, but my teachers were always the punish the whole class type. I can remember my hand cramping up, and I would just write as fast as I could to get it over with. I remember an entire day spent by the whole class writing some sentence or other over and over again. I doubt my handwriting would have ever been beautiful, and I'm sure some of my classmates escaped with decent handwriting but I don't think punishments like that helped.

I remember one time, as a punishment for chewing gum, the teacher made us write this sentence over and over: I will not masticate colloidial substances in school." Yup, she gave us that instead of "I will not chew gum in school." We were pissed. We didn't even know those words as yet.

You know, I bet these days teachers WISH the worst that the kids did was chew gum!

From my dad's side.

If I got excuse notes or report cards signed by him the school would usually call him to verify.
His handwriting did look just like mine, even in grade school. :rofl:

My handwriting didn't improve, either Some of my siblings and my nieces and nephews look just as bad.
They are almost identical, squashed, spastic scratches.

We laugh about our genetically bad handwriting.

The notion that mom is so upset this time that she's never going to love you as much anymore.

homes suck.

I grew up during the Inquisition.

Oh, man, my mom's a social worker, and Italian. She can talk!

And she still does it even now... :groan:

Once my dad threw me across the living room after I accidently slammed by brother's finger in a door, but he threw me onto a sofa. It was scary, but not painful.

Getting a switch off the tree to get whipped with.

Smaller more limber branches left a smaller footprint, but stung more.
There was really no better choice, it sucked either way.

Also been locked in a dark closet for a time. Can't remember what for.
That one still screws me up.


Then there was pre-emptive psychological punishment.
When I was very young my Mom would read this poem to me.


"The Little Orphan Annie

by

James Whitcomb Riley

Little Orphan Annie's come to my house to stay.
To wash the cups and saucers up and brush the crumbs away.
To shoo the chickens from the porch and dust the hearth and sweep,
and make the fire and bake the bread to earn her board and keep.
While all us other children, when the supper things is done,
we sit around the kitchen fire and has the mostest fun,
a listening to the witch tales that Annie tells about
and the goblins will get ya if ya don't watch out!

Once there was a little boy who wouldn't say his prayers,
and when he went to bed at night away up stairs,
his mammy heard him holler and his daddy heard him bawl,
and when they turned the covers down,
he wasn't there at all!
They searched him in the attic room
and cubby hole and press
and even up the chimney flu and every wheres, I guess,
but all they ever found of him was just his pants and round-abouts
and the goblins will get ya if ya don't watch out!!

Once there was a little girl who always laughed and grinned
and made fun of everyone, of all her blood and kin,
and once when there was company and old folks was there,
she mocked them and she shocked them and said, she didn't care.
And just as she turned on her heels and to go and run and hide,
there was two great big black things a standing by her side.
They snatched her through the ceiling fore she knew what shes about,
and the goblins will get ya if ya don't watch out!!

When the night is dark and scary,
and the moon is full and creatures are a flying and the wind goes Whoooooooooo,
you better mind your parents and your teachers fond and dear,
and cherish them that loves ya, and dry the orphans tears
and help the poor and needy ones that cluster all about,
or the goblins will get ya if ya don't watch out!!!"

_______________________________________________


This had a tendency to make me not want to do anything that would cause me to be snatched through the ceiling by goblins.