Hunted up some sites and things that might help let the natural grief work through.
http://www.google.com/Top/Recreation/Pets/Loss/http://www.ability.org.uk/pet_loss.htmlhttp://forums.petlovers.com/vb/showthread.php?t=11508http://www.ritualwell.org/lifecycles/sitefolder.2006-10-25.0669142154/GrieivingLossofPet.xmlMany local shelters and Humane Societies sponsor memorial pages at their sites. Sometimes they want a donation in exchange for the space for a pet memorial online. We all know they could use what ever funds we can pass along to them. Check out your local shelter sites. There are some amazing stories and testimonials about some wonderful pets. If it would help you to write some lasting memorial words, these are some great places for you to share a tribute to a lost friend.
All you who have lost vital companion animals, know many here at DU who share understanding and lend support in your times of sadness.
From:
http://www.michvet.com/clients/dealing_with_loss4.asp IF I SHOULD GROW FRAIL
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain does keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done
For this - the last battle - can't be won.
You will be sad I understand
But don't let grief then stay your hand.
For on this day, more than the rest
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn't want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end.
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must now be you
Who has to decide this thing to do.
We've been so close - we two- these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.
(author unknown)
Here is a link to help when the pain of loss takes its toll:
http://www.michvet.com/clients/dealing_with_loss2.aspIt seems like a good guide for times when we stumble and can't see through our tears. There are common sense reminders like: "Claim your grief - Give yourself permission to cry as much as you need to."
How you feel is not silly and should not be disregarded. Honor your feelings.
There is a list of good books to help too. I would add my favorite:
Goodbye, friend by Gary Kowalski
There are some lovely sites with memorials, poems and heartfelt, honest sharing from others who understand. If you have a site that may offer support/comfort/understanding for those who have lost a beloved companion animal, please share it.
I do not wish to make light of, or comparison to, the loss of our human companions, but too many people do not get the respect for loss of a family member who happened to have fur. The loss can be just as keenly felt for many. It can actually be more acute for some. We do well to help each other through all our painful losses. Sometimes, society slights those dealing with the loss of a beloved and important companion animal.
Hugs to all who need one. Many here at DU offer friendship, support, and hopefully, some small degree of help to our DU friends. Personally, I do so to honor the memory of a couple of cats who taught me a lot about devotion, trust, love, and life.
In memory of Smudge and Havoc, who had the hearts and souls of giants, peace and strength to you, and a shoulder to cry on until it comes.
havocmom