Have you ever noticed that weddings tend to happen in clusters? Warning: Possible sexism

Connonym

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Fri Sep-28-07 02:42 AM
Original message

Have you ever noticed that weddings tend to happen in clusters? Warning: Possible sexism

It seems like when one couple announces an engagement very shortly thereafter a couple more engagements will pop up in the same pool of friends/acquaintances. Is it just the people I know? Is it bridal oneupmanship? Keeping up with the Joneses? Coincidence?

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billyskank

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Fri Sep-28-07 02:43 AM
Response to Original message

1. It's possible that one couple deciding to get married may inspire other couples

Not necessarily one-upmanship, maybe. :hi:

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Rabrrrrrr

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Fri Sep-28-07 05:45 AM
Response to Original message

2. It's because women think marriage is like a lotto or something, so if a friend "wins",

they have to "win", too, and so they pressure their current boyfriends that they better be getting married, too.

Which is too bad. It would be nicer if they viewed a wedding as a ceremony of sacred love and marriage as a partnership through the ages.

But too many view it as their opportunity to have great photos and have every going ga-ga over them for a day.

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SarahB

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Fri Sep-28-07 07:12 AM
Response to Reply #2

6. Shouldn't you say SOME women?

We're not unilaterally minded. Because some shallow types exist, it doesn't make us all that way. Kind of like saying, "All men are jerks" (which is stupid, silly, and obviously not true).

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Rabrrrrrr

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Fri Sep-28-07 07:43 AM
Response to Reply #6

7. You are correct - I left out the "some" in the subject line.

Sorry!

Thanks for pointing it out. Clearly, not at all women are that shallow.I know a hell of a lot of them like that, but I also know some good, decent women who are not at all like that.

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RubyDuby in GA

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Fri Sep-28-07 11:12 AM
Response to Reply #2

11. It's in our rule book

Ya know - like going to the bathroom in groups :P

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Deja Q

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:11 AM
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3. And at some moonie mass matrimonies, 10,000 couples 'wed'. How's that for a cluster of nuts, honey?

http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/I/51MYEQCXGPL._AA280_PIbundle-4,TopRight,0,0_AA280_SH20_.jpg

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Phentex

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:50 AM
Response to Original message

4. There should be a name for it. This is happening

where I work. One lady is getting married in April and has been planning the wedding for some time. She's not particularly a bridezilla either. A couple of weeks ago, another lady suddenly announced her wedding (no engagement?) and she is planning it for 2 weeks after the other wedding. To a guy she caught cheating on her just a month ago.

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THUNDER HANDS

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:54 AM
Response to Original message

5. no woman wants to be the last in her circle of friends to get married

why?

because they think their other friends won't care about their wedding if they're the last one.

MR <---- guy about to propose.

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JVS

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:22 PM
Response to Reply #5

18. I'd buy that explanation

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yellowdogintexas

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Fri Sep-28-07 08:25 AM
Response to Original message

8. I think it has more to do with cycle of life..the clusters tend to

cycle around college graduations, and other "milestones". If a group of couples has been socially close for a long time, the relationships are usually progressing at the same rate ..some just get to the point of tying the knot sooner than others.

Now on the one hand, it may be some women getting antsy because 6 of their sorority sisters have rings and they only have a frat pin...or it could also be the the men decide OK if Joe can take the plunge I can too...or combination of same. I don't discount shallowness or herd instinct EVER but I really think it is more of a cyclic thing.

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Robb

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Fri Sep-28-07 08:26 AM
Response to Original message

9. It's like having kids

You know. Monkey see, monkey do.

:D (runs for door)

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Connonym

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Fri Sep-28-07 09:30 AM
Response to Reply #9

10. damn, is that how I got pregnant?

:-P

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Left Is Write

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Fri Sep-28-07 03:06 PM
Response to Reply #10

14. You mean, by a monkey?

:hide:

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Connonym

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:20 PM
Response to Reply #14

16. I didn't know you'd met my ex

hehehehe :evilgrin:

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skygazer

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Fri Sep-28-07 11:16 AM
Response to Original message

12. Most people tend to hang out with people in similar circumstances

College students tend to hang out with college students, couples tend to hang out with other couples, marrieds with small kids tend to hang out with other marrieds with small kids, retirees tend to hang out with other retirees.

I don't think its any real mystery or competition or conspiracy. I think its a matter of people in around the same stage of life doing the things that happen at that stage in life.

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WildEyedLiberal

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Fri Sep-28-07 12:31 PM
Response to Original message

13. My sister and her friends all got married within about a year of each other

And then six years later all had kids within a year of each other. My niece and two of my sister's friends' kids are actually all within a month of each other. It's SO weird. The first one of them that had a baby apparently infected the rest of them with baby fever, I guess.

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Oeditpus Rex

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Fri Sep-28-07 03:20 PM
Response to Original message

15. It's like mowing the lawn

Every Saturday in Near Suburbia, one guy mows his lawn at about 10 a.m., or whenever the grass is dry enough. By mid-afternoon, four more guys have mown theirs. The first two were thinking, "Goddammit, Ed's not gonna have a better-looking lawn than me!" but the other two were kicked off the couch by their wives at halftime of the USC-Oregon game (so their lawn job isn't as good as the others' because they had three or four beers in 'em by then).

A week later, one couple gets married, and four other women say to their fianc�s, "If we don't get married next weekend, I'm running over you with the lawn mower!"

:popcorn:

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Taverner

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Fri Sep-28-07 06:21 PM
Response to Original message

17. My guess, when you meet someone new you're quick to introduce their friends to yours

Sometimes those match ups stick.

Given the incubation rate of a relationship to marriage is probably similar among friends, a cluster might be expected.

Of course, also what you said too...

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