Match Game story style: "___________ vapor."

As always, ten words or more for the blank. The more morbid, evil, or twisted it is, the better.

Imagine you are a Game Show celebrity, and while everyone else is giving their standard one word answers to the blank, you are a devilish person who creeps people out, and so you offer an entire awful paragraph just to further creep people out and make them fear being beside you.

Imagine that, then fill in the blank.

:shrug:

although it is plural and spelled differently, if it were singular and spelled in an American style, would be known as the vapor:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpCcelpvkps

The screaming cat urine vapor plagued the 13 original colonies. In his journal, Nabob R. Pippin wrote;

"lo, as I write this, a heavy yellow mist encompasses our small village. Dank and sour as any cat urine vapor has ever a man seen. The cattle protests and the babes do wail... My eldest daughter, Scottish Pippin, has fallen ill. This fever of hers seems to be from cleaning the cat litter box where our 19 cats relieve themselves. Woe be unto all who come near."

The idea of the game is to fill in the blank with a bunch of words, which means - in this particular case - that the final end product will be something in which "vapor" is the absolutely last word, since the entire game phrase is "________ vapor." If it were "Fat Freddie was so fat, he couldn't even _________ in a whale hide", then the story would begin "Fat Freddie was so fat, he couldn't even", then continue (that's the blank), then end with "in a whale hide".

The second rule is in this process is, unlike the original match game in which a blank was filled with just one word, we fill the blank with at least ten words, making some kind of story; which story, as I said in the first sentence, must, in this particular case, end with the word "vapor".

But, even so, good creativity there, folks! Funny answers, especially the cat urine vapor.

Why do you hate me, Gene Rayburn?

So far, the only "successful" post in the thread!

:thumbsup:

I hope I get some lovely parting gifts!

barely dressed, whispering "Take me, come to me," I reacted by tasting her lips and taking in her vapor.

Like dat?

:hi:

:thumbsup:

and now there is a noxious vapor.

and glanced furtively over her shoulder, down the vast gloomy corridor illuminated only by a few flickering toadfat-oil lamps, knowing that somewhere down that hellish hallway lurked one-armed Bob the serial killer; and that if she hesitated for even a moment instead of gathering up her courage enough to run barefoot across the naked, dismembered and mouldering corpses of Bob's previous victims she would soon be captured and eviscerated and Bob would eat her liver amid her entrails' wispy and attenuated....

:thumbsup:

:rofl:

Like a perfectly constructed joke, every word is necessary and in just the right order.

second-grade classmates, Susie, full of childish innocence and pure goodness, was torturously assaulted by the insane Mad Carl who stabbed her repeatedly in the face and legs and arms with the jagged shin bone of Jack The Ripper until she was nearly comatose with blood loss. Carl dragged her sickeningly lacerated body to his basement, Susie's mouth held slightly open in a silent, universe-shaking scream of horror, her innocence utterly destroyed by the inhumanity she was suffering under, to be replaced with utter terror and fear for what was to come as Mad Carl began piercing her with brass cabinetry fittings and dining on her still-living flesh. As sweet, prayed-for death finally relieved Susie of her suffering, Mad Carl continued to eat until, in the end, the only memory of Susie left in the universe was a whisp of her digestively-transformed body as it escaped from Mad Carl in the form of a small leak of anal

:rofl:

That would be some special vapor.

and was raptured to heaven in a toxic stream of wanker vapor.