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"Blessed and Highly Favored!" Give me a break?

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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:20 AM
Original message
"Blessed and Highly Favored!" Give me a break?
Bornagain Boy in the next office. Say, " 'Morning Larry. How you doing?" and you get:

"Blessed and Highly Favored!"

And the Evangelicals WONDER why people like me can't wait for them to get "Raptured." I asked a simple question, and I get an update on his hopes of Heaven.

Kill me. Or Kill HIM. Preferably HIM.
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:29 AM
Response to Original message
1. FUCK! He said it AGAIN!!
Thank Dog Naomi showed up. Her first comment other then "Hey, Tom!":

"What is WITH my email? You know, if I was a guy and answered all the stupid spam I get, my dick would be 10 feet long."

I LOVE Naomi.
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Richardo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:30 AM
Response to Original message
2. He's looking for a reaction. Don't give him one.
Instead, when someone asks how you are, say: "Going to Hell with all deliberate dispatch."
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:45 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. OOOO I LIKE it.
I do get VERY TIRED of the "Literal Bible Genesis Rapture Jesus vs Islam/Hindu/Buddha BS. I even brought in my "Pinhead Cenobite 'HELLRAISER' ACTION FIGURE" and that hasn't slowed him down.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:50 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. Plus, "Going to hell with all deliberate dispatch" won't require you to
lie, TD. :P :rofl:
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:52 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. I think the company will be more interesting, anyway.
If Hell is living without the Voice of God, then I won't me missing anything, as that voice has been strangely silent in my life.

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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:00 AM
Response to Reply #5
8. But, but, but, are you saying
that Mr. BornAgain _isn't_ the voice of gawdAwmighty?????? :spray:
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FloridaJudy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:03 AM
Response to Reply #5
10. And judging by the people
Who claim that they hear His voice personally, it's not something I'd be eager to hear myself.
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mikeytherat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:57 AM
Response to Original message
6. In Christian theology, I have only come across one "highly favoured" person:
The Virgin Mary.

So, if your co-worker actually believes his theology, he is equating himself with the Holy Mother of God, and is bucking for a lightning bolt.

mikey_the_rat
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:02 AM
Response to Reply #6
9. He's sort of a Baptist.
Don't they call her "The Whore of Babylon," or something?
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mikeytherat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:05 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. No! But please, PLEASE suggest that to him!
Here's why:
The Whore of Babylon is one of several Christian and Rastafarian allegorical figures of supreme evil mentioned in the Book of Revelation in the Bible. She is associated with the Antichrist and the Beast of Revelation by connection with the kingdom with seven heads and ten horns.

"Holy Mother of God; ain't she that evil seven-headed beast or sumthin?"

mikey_the_rat
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mikeytherat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:11 AM
Response to Reply #9
12. If he's a Baptist, he'll love this joke:
Walking across a bridge, I saw a man on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: “Stop. Don’t do it.”

“Why not?” he asked.

“Well, there’s so much to live for!”

“Like what?”

“Are you religious?”

He said: “Yes.”

I said: “Me too. Are you a Christian?”

“Yes.”

“Me, too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?”

“Protestant.”

“Me, too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

“Baptist.”

“Me, too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Church of the Lord?”

“Baptist Church of God.”

“Me, too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or Reformed Baptist Church of God?”

“Reformed Baptist Church of God.”

“Me, too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?

He said: “Reformation of 1915.”

I said: “Die, heretic scum,” and pushed him off.


mikey_the_rat
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Lydia Leftcoast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #6
30. Yes, in the Christmas carol "Gabriel's Message," the refrain goes
"Most highly favored lady" (i.e. the Virgin Mary)
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sarge43 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 08:58 AM
Response to Original message
7. FWIW, my response
"Blessed and highly favored, huh? You obviously didn't get the memo."
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Bossy Monkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:11 AM
Response to Original message
13. "I didn't ask how the New England Patriots are doing; I asked how you're doing"
Not that it would be a good idea to say it, but it would be funny.
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Whoa_Nelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:29 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. Or....
I didn't ask where you are on the Christ-O-Meter.... :P
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:33 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. I WANT a "Christ-O-Meter!"
Gotta figure that these self-righteous, uptight ("LANGUAGE!"...one of his FAVORITE comments) yahoos would register in the NEGATIVE!
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Whoa_Nelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:53 AM
Response to Reply #16
31. At the very least, you should have one of these...


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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-29-07 06:42 AM
Response to Reply #31
42. Where did you get that ALERT?
I LOVE those things.

Cutie.
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MorningGlow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:28 AM
Response to Original message
14. Well isn't he a smug rat bastard!
Point him to the part of the New Testament where Jesus says truly spiritual people don't wear their religion on their sleeve, praying in the street, but instead do it quietly, in private.

Or, same message, from Lao Tzu: "He who knows does not speak. He who speaks does not know."

Prolly won't stop him, though...those types are a bit thick...
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 09:41 AM
Response to Reply #14
17. Tried that...didn't work.
Edited on Tue Nov-27-07 09:42 AM by Tyler Durden
He countered with the MAKE A JOYFUL NOISE and GO AND TEACH ALL NATIONS.

Always thought that was a very ARROGANT verse, and you know whose department THAT is:

Lucifer: "Your war is arrogant. That makes it evil. And that's mine."



Christopher Walken, Viggo Mortensen, Elias Koteas, Eric Stolz, Virginia Madsen, Amanda Plummer...

PROPHECY was so great.
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MorningGlow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:07 AM
Response to Reply #17
18. Of course he did
Ah, the classic fundie funtime activity, cherry-picking Bible verses. :eyes:

Haven't seen Prophecy--looks good. Maybe you could lend your fundie friend a copy!
:rofl:
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:36 AM
Response to Reply #18
24. You know what?
I DID! He hasn't watched it yet.....

Hopefully I'll get it back in one piece!
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MorningGlow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:58 AM
Response to Reply #24
33. Maybe
But look out for splashes of holy water on the cover! :evilgrin:
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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:09 AM
Response to Original message
19. Oh, gawd. I would be tempted to "accidentally" spill my coffee on him.
What a smug, deluded prick. x(
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
20. Run into his office with a fork and a napkin and say, "oh, I thought you said highly FLAVORED"
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:25 AM
Response to Reply #20
22. LOL
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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:17 AM
Response to Original message
21. That is very arrogant and presumptuous of him.
I imagine he's not a very popular person except among other disfunctional fanatics.
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
23. Hate to disappoint you there Tyler but the Rapture Index went down a point this week
We liberals are just not trying hard enough!
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:38 AM
Response to Reply #23
26. 's ok.
He drives a shitty car, and the only CD's he has are PRAISE CD's. Thank DOG he doesn't play them loud enough to escape his space; I'd rather listen to Country, and that says a lot knowing me.
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displacedtexan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:37 AM
Response to Original message
25. Try this.
Answer: "Isaiah 1:17!"

(Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.)

Tee hee.
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:44 AM
Response to Reply #25
27. Perhaps the guy should be reminded of this
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%206:6
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MrCoffee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:47 AM
Response to Reply #27
28. or all of Matthew 23
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2023;&version=31;
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riona Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
29. Suggest a summer vacation destination
(from scari.org)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:54 AM
Response to Original message
32. highly favored? by whom? with what?
so confused
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AlCzervik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:58 AM
Response to Original message
34. i understand the "Blessed" but "Highly Favored"? i don't get it.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #34
35. me either
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 01:01 PM
Response to Reply #35
37. It's a Catholic Charismatic saying:
http://www.catholiccharismaticny.org/Papers/Fr__Ikeke_s_Corner/Blessed_and_Highly_Favored/blessed_and_highly_favored.html

Remember the Charismatic movement? (Pri is too young). They were big in the 70's. Lots of Faith Healing and "Slain in the Spirit" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slain_in_the_Spirit.

Scares the shit out of me that these are the people today wielding so much POWER. Welcome to The Inquisition, 21st Century.
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Swede Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 12:00 PM
Response to Original message
36. Well,I'll be damned.
nt
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lildreamer316 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 02:12 PM
Response to Reply #36
39. LOL n/t
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 01:04 PM
Response to Original message
38. Highly favored? Never heard that one,
and I've been around just about every kind of Christian. That's seems a little arrogant to me.
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PVnRT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-27-07 02:32 PM
Response to Original message
40. OHHHHHH I thought it said "flavored"
That's much different.
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Maraya1969 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Nov-29-07 05:09 AM
Response to Original message
41. "Well at least you're a harmless lunatic. So many of your kind have resorted
to violence in the name of God. You on the other hand seem to be content with delusions of grandeur and I appreciate that. We all do"


I'd say something along that line. Find a way to put him down with a smile on your face. After all that is what he is doing to you by declaring he is "highly favored", (as if you are not)
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