So I was at Olive Garden enjoying a cigar, teaching my kid about the dating by singing Meatloaf's...

"Paradise by the Dashboard Light" while my wife breastfed our 6 year old quintuplets (damn fertility treatment). Oh yeah, I was wearing my FUCK DELAWARE t-shirt as well. Suddenly an SUV with a DU bumpersticker pulls up, driven by a woman with "Trophy Wife" written on her shirt. The doors open up and suddenly one of them jumps out and starts kicking my ass. Another starts screaming at me about Delaware's tolls being cheap compared to a 300 mile jaunt on the PA turnpike. Finally a woman whose face was crusted with the remains of Chicken Pot Pie exits the car drinking straight from a box of wine. She was kind enough to tell her companions to back off, thus saving my life. She swiped the remainder of the wine on the table, but it was a small price to pay for survival.

They should have been playing Captain Beefheart on the radio. Things would have gone your way then.

or maybe "When I See Mommy I Feel Like A Mummy"
:applause:
likes me some Captain Beefheart, I do...
had his Shiny Beast/Batchain Puller album on 8-track many years ago...

Delaware rocks - perhaps if you visited you'd learn to love our state!

:P

I kid, I kid.

:loveya:

:pals:

:spank:

"Why celebrate it at all if you don't believe that the blood and body are truly present?" we bellowed in our drunken rage. Then my mom showed up and gave us a ride home, even though she's ELCA and we're LCMS.

:pals:

you do realize that you are not as cool as your mom since you are LCMS. ;)