My mom passed away on Saturday.

She was 72. She had been ill for the past 5 years or so, with lung problems. Among other things, she had MRSA (though not the super bug kind that just hit a few months ago). Mom was a preemie, and the lungs are one of the last things to develop, so she was already vulnerable.

She was a strong woman, and she fought so hard when she was laid low at different times by her illness. She always got back up though, but with each bout, it became more and more difficult, especially mentally. It was as if she were constantly being buffeted by high winds, and in the end, she was just too tired to try one more time.

Mom had been in a nursing home to get IV antibiotics. Then the nursing home was hit with a virus, and it was basically the last straw for mom. On Friday night, one of my sisters called me and said that mom had asked that her feeding tube be shut off. Mom had been unable to each much by mouth for quite awhile, so she was on a feeding tube. I knew that shutting it off meant she was ready to go. My youngest brother and his wife were there Friday night, and mom told them she was sorry (that she was going), but they told her that it was okay. And it was. We didn't want to lose her, but we knew how much she had been through, and we knew that she was tired. She didn't want to leave us either, but she was so very tired.

What she wanted most was to go home, so Saturday morning, my sister-in-law went to pick her up and take her there. Mom was still aware of things; she got herself out of bed and into her wheelchair, and then got herself into the car. By the time my SIL got to mom's house, mom was non-responsive. My SIL called my brother, and he came over and carried mom into the house, and laid her on her bed. Then he, my SIL, and my two sisters laid down with her, and were there when she passed. She was home, she was in her own bed, and she was comfortable. Her passing was very peaceful, which we all wanted for her.

I arrived at mom's several hours later. The house was full of siblings and siblings-in-law; my daughter and SIL had also come down to Oregon.

My mom never lost her sense of humor, no matter how sick she was, and she never stopped being concerned about her kids or her friends. She taught us how to be a family, how to be a parent, how to be a friend, and how to reach out to others in need. She had this way about her that I have tried to match as a parent: she was fiercely loyal to us, but she knew enough to step back and let us make our own mistakes and learn from them. She never turned her back on anyone she loved, and the number of people who loved her is great indeed.

I love her so much, and I will miss her terribly. But I also feel a calmness, and a sense of peace, in knowing that she left the way she wanted to, and she left her love with us.

Rest well, mom. I love you.

:hug:

May your mom rest in peace.

My deepest condolences to you and your family. :hug:

died at 71; now your mother at 72. The numbers just seem to stack up so quickly.

So sorry she was in such ill health, but it sounds as if she went the way she wanted to.

I am vowing to keep healthy. My husband, Audio Al, has had a dreadful cough/cold/bronchitis since Feb. 3rd. I finally called the doctor and got him some strong cough medicine. I hope this doesn't turn into something really terrible. He will be 74 years old this year. We are scheduled to go to Hawaii later this month.

Stay strong, sweetheart. Your mother got to see her granddaughter married, am I correct?

Warmly,

Radio Lady Ellen Kimball in Oregon

PS. Candle for your mom.... www.gratefulness.org

http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/message.cfm?l=eng&cid=5324976

:hug:

:hug:

And here's one from Haruka:

:hug:

She knows what it's like to lose a parent.

Be strong. :hug:

but she was a wise woman and knew when it was time to let go

:hug:

:hug:

:hug:

I'm so sorry. :hug:

SeattleGirl.

:hug:

Your mom sounds like a lovely woman.

Aw, sweetie...

Big, big hugs to you now...

And for as long as you need them, OK?

I know how hard it is to lose your mom...

But you're right...she was ready to go, and so she did, on her own terms...

Hold onto your good memories, for they are many...

You will always have her in your heart...

When you want her, all you have to do is...look...

Safe passage to her...

Hugs for you...:hug: :hug: :hug: :loveya: :hug: :loveya:

It's been a rough year for you. :hug:

i'm glad she was surrounded by love at the end

safe passage, mom

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:hug:

I wish you and your family all the peace and comfort in the world.

May we all be as lucky when it's time.

May she rest in peace.


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dg

My deepest condolences to you and your family. :hug:

:hug:

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. ~Kahlil Gibran

but I'm glad you're at peace, and it sounds like she was ready... if only we were all so lucky.

:pals:

thankful that her passing was so peaceful.

My dear MIL had a similarly peaceful end recently and it has made a tremendous difference to all of us knowing that she was able to be in her own bed, surrounded by loved ones.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

It sounds like your mom passed peacefully surrounded by those who loved her and I hope you can take comfort from the fact that she is at rest and no suffering.

My heart goes out to you at this very sad time.

:hug:

~MB

Prayers for you and your family...

Am so sorry for your loss.

I think so highly of you, and no doubt, some of that is because of what your mother gave to you in terms of love, sweetness, and more.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

Your family did the best thing for her, bringing her home and letting her go like that :hug:

:hug: :grouphug:

My thoughts go out to you and all the people that loved your mom.

:hug:

:hug: I hope that all the good memories of life with your Mom will help ease the sadness.

What a tough time for you. I'm glad she went on her terms. She sounds like a wonderful, loving Mom! Take care of yourself.:hug:

:hug:

I am so sorry .....
What an absolutely beautiful story.....
My mom died here at home to.... surrounded by her family....

:hug: :hug:

lost

:hug:

:hug::hug:

She left a good daughter. My condolences.

:hug:

She left a good daughter. My condolences.

Might she be free from suffering. Peace and comfort to you. :hug:

:( Losing your mom is hard, no matter how old you are.

:hug:

Edited to add: I meant whether you're a child or an adult, not implying that you're old! :blush: (I lost my mom when I was 14.)

I'm glad she was able to make the journey home, so she could make her final transition to another plane from familiar surroundings.

She sounds like she was an inspiration to you and your family and her friends.

:grouphug:

I'm glad you had time to prepare, though, and that your mother went the way she wanted to go. You'll have those great memories to last you all your life.

:hug:

I understand, and have been there myself. Take care and always remember her in your heart.


:hug: :grouphug:

I'm glad she made it home to pass away in her own bed, among those who loved her. You are in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

:hug: :pals: My heart goes out to you. I'm thinking about you.

It sounds like she was a beautiful soul.

:hug:

I'm glad she was able to make the journey home, so she could make her final transition to another plane from familiar surroundings.

She sounds like she was an inspiration to you and your family and her friends.

:grouphug:

She sounds like a beautiful person. When I am at that stage and rejoin the infinite, I hope my passing will be as gentle.

For your mom

I understand, and have been there myself. Take care and always remember her in your heart.


:hug: :grouphug:

She sounds like a wonderful woman. She will be sorely missed. But I'm glad she died peacefully, and that all had a chance to say goodbye.

I hope when my time comes I can die surrounded by love. I wish all beings could be so blessed.

:hug:

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:hug:

She sounds like a wonderful woman. She will be sorely missed. But I'm glad she died peacefully, and that all had a chance to say goodbye.

I hope when my time comes I can die surrounded by love. I wish all beings could be so blessed.

:hug:

:hug:

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Hugs and condolences to you and your family. :hug:

She sounds like a wonderful woman. She will be sorely missed. But I'm glad she died peacefully, and that all had a chance to say goodbye.

I hope when my time comes I can die surrounded by love. I wish all beings could be so blessed.

SG. Your mom sounds like a remarkable woman, and what a blessing to begin the next part of her journey in her own bed, surrounded by thoses she loved and was loved by. May we all be so lucky :hug:

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

:loveya: :loveya: :loveya:

sorry

Sending peaceful loving vibes your way. What a wonderful person she must have been. :hug:

I tried three times to upload an image but the server timed out, so please let me just say thank you for that beautiful story. All of us must pass, and I'm sure many of us would hope our passing could be so peaceful and full of love.

To the divine silence of perfected knowledge;
To the divine silence of the soundless voice;
To the divine silence of the heart of the Labyrinth;
To the divine silence of the ancient mind;
To the divine silence of the unborn guide;
to the divine silence of the unseen guide,
protector of all sentient life;
To the divine silence of perfected knowledge;
To the divine silence of primate incarnation;
To the divine knowledge of the labyrinth guides;
who sacrifice their liberation for those
who have not awakened to the truth;
To the divine silence of the Lord of Death,
the eternal unborn resident of the labyrinth
who has sacrificed his own redemption
for the redemption of all voyagers everywhere;
to the divine silence of the primordial being;
To the divine silence of the great sacrifice;
We offer homage,love and hope;
But above all, we give our gratitude.

the american book of the dead


May you be comforted by the ones you love in this time of need,

:hug:

you were lucky to have her.

Sorry for your loss.

I lost my pop a year ago and it is still hard. Sending you a big hug.

:hug:

May she rest in peace

:hug:

but what a loving tribute. She obviously was strong woman who left on her terms with dignity. Rest In Peace, SeattleGirl's mom. :hug:

You are in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

may you and your family be at peace.

and surrounded by love as she passed. :hug: to you SG.

your mother was a brave and lovely person. You we're lucky to have such a wonderful mother SeattleGirl.

It sounds like she had a great life, and her passing was peaceful for everyone. Losing your mom (or dad) is always heartbreaking, but she was surrounded by love.:hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I can tell by your description of her last days that I would have liked her. I always admire people who live on their own terms.

Peace to you and your family during this difficult time.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I can tell by your description of her last days that I would have liked her. I always admire people who live on their own terms.

Peace to you and your family during this difficult time.

I remember when you told us how she helped you out on a car loan about a year ago. I still miss my mother and wish I could've been with her more instead of being concerned so much about "my life". She died about two weeks before Princess Di so every time something comes up about her I think of my mother. Know that she'll always be close to you in spirit.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I can tell by your description of her last days that I would have liked her. I always admire people who live on their own terms.

Peace to you and your family during this difficult time.

I'm sorry for your loss.

You did a super job expressing her peace.

:hug:

May she rest in peace. A :hug: for you and your family.

:hug:

are extended to you and your family on the loss of your mother:hug: :hug: :hug: I'm so, so very sorry. Your mother sounds like a very strong, courageous, compassionate woman who always thought of her family and friends first and foremost and, from your account, these qualifies endured until the end of her life. Your words communicate very eloquently and passionately how much you loved her and I know that she knew that. I know that that her legacy of love, kindness, compassion and generosity will endure forever in the hearts and souls of those who knew and loved her and in the hearts and souls of those whose lives she touched

From the collection of poems that we gathered following my own mother's passing


Farewell My Friend

It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
~ Rabindranath Tagore

to a fine lady. You had me tearing up at the whole carrying in the house and lying down with her.

I'm so sorry she's left you so soon. May all the wonderful memories sustain you.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

:cry: :cry: :cry:

:hug: :hug:

:hi:

...peace. :hug:

:hug:

I'm sad I'll never get the chance to tell your mom what a wonderful daughter she has. I'm thinking, though, that she probably already knew this. :hug:

The world is a more wonderful place because she was here, and she lives on as long as the memories do.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss. We're thinking of you.

:hug: :hug: :hug:
Julie (and Eric)

My personal condolences for your loss.

:hug:

to you and your family, Seattle Girl. How great that your mother was able to
die as she wanted without trauma. She had a lot of courage. z

I am glad that she passed so peacefully and that you feel at peace with it. I know you
will miss her, but take comfort in the gift that you and your family gave her by respecting her wishes
and letting her go so beautifully. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

She sounds like a wonderful lady.

May she rest in peace.

It's very hard to lose your mother. It's good that she had loved ones around when she went.

many hugs and much love.
I'm so very sorry for your loss.

kesha.
:hug:

:hug:

RL

:(

:hug: Your mom sounds like a truly wonderful person. Peace be with you all. :pals:

How lucky for you to have had such a wonderful mother who obviously passed down those kind, caring traits to her family. I'm so sorry for your loss.

May she rest in peace.

:hug:

:hug: :hug: :hug:

She must be a truly beautiful soul.

what an amazing woman. You're a lot like her. :hug:

It is never easy to lose a parent. Sounds like you will always have great memories of her. So happy she got to have her last wish. What a great family.

please take care.

:hug:

Peace be with you and your family during this painful time of loss. :hug: Be gentle with yourself and know that you are loved. :loveya:

May your mom rest in peace.

This is so close to home for me now -- I really feel your pain and sadness. I just hope when the end comes for my mother in the coming days that she passes so peacefully surrounded by those who love her.

They removed the breathing tube today and she's breathing on her own with just the help of one of those plastic masks, but she's in and out of pain. At least she can start communicating with us a little, although since the tube just came out, it's very difficult for her to talk. The last few days she's at least been lucid enough to be aware of our presence.

:hug:

I hope that the ache in your heart is soon replaced by fond memories of your mom.

:hug:

...we're thinking of you. :grouphug:

:hug: :hug:

:hug:

We went through something similar when my mother-in-law died. This brought back memories - both sad and good.

I wish you much peace in the days to come.

:hug:

I'm so glad that you could all be there with her to help her cross over.
She must have been a VERY special lady to have raised you to be such a wonderful and caring person.

You are deeply loved by all of us, and her love lives on in you now. Peace to you and your family.

:hug:

You had a beautiful mom. :hug:

I'm very sorry. :hug:

your family. It sounds as if your mother had great dignity and strength of mind and spirit. All my very best to you. :hug:

you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers in this difficult time- :hug: I know your mom loved more than anything, being home and surrounded by her family, and going the way she chose to go, when she wanted to go. What a wonderful gift to her. :hug:

I've been where you're at. But remember, there are many here who care. Let us know how you're getting along, okay??
:grouphug:

May the memories you have of your mom keep her always in your heart.

:hug::hug::hug:

That's sad to hear.

hold tight to all the love

:hug: you will be in my thoughts

my deepest condolences to you and your family.

I'm sorry, :hug:

You're in my thoughts and prayers.

:hug: :loveya:

tons of :hug:

You will miss her forever, but is is good that you are at peace because she took charge of how she would make her exit.

:hug:

:hug:

Take comfort in the thought that she died peacefully at home with her family around her. I wish I could take your pain away, but I can't. You are in my thoughts :hug:

It is so hard to lose a parent. Thankfully she left on her terms.

Prayers to you and your family at this difficult time.

that is what all of us will have someday...mourn not her death but celebrate her life

Sounds like a wonderful lady!

Peace to you! :hug:

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

:hug:

You wrote a lovely tribute to her. Glad she was able to pass at home among her loved ones.

I wish I could think of something to make it better. I am sending a hug.

:hug:

But greatly inspired by your family's caring and support for your mother
and for each other.

Thanks so much for sharing.

Peace.

and it is so nice to hear a story like this where a person like your Mom got to die with dignity in the surroundings she wanted.

But greatly inspired by your family's caring and support for your mother
and for each other.

Thanks so much for sharing.

Peace.

You and your family will be in my thoughts.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

n/t

I'm glad your family was able to give her the peaceful, loving passing that anyone would want.

How inspiring that she left on her terms.
Hope love and happiness wishes for you an yours. Celebrate her life.

I know how that feels. The mourning never ends, Girl, but they are never really gone ...

We are the spears they hurled to the future ...

:hug: :loveya:

I apologize for being late with my condolences, sweetie. :hug: :hug:

:hug:

So sorry for your loss. Your post brought tears to my eyes. :hug: :hug:

I hope your mom is in a better place, my condolences to your family.

My mother passed away from cancer several years ago.

My condolences.

Thank you for sharing your touching story.

:hug: