A boring Sunday review for Star Trek TNG, season 1:

The year is 1987. Buck Rogers went nowhere, but greedy paramount execs wanted to capitalize on the revitalized Star Trek lore, without having to bring in Shatner, Nimoy, and the other walking expenses. So TNG was born. With updated effects, a new ship with new capabilities, and a new crew, where might they go and what might they do?

Let's find out!



Encounter at Farpoint -- a bit plain for a series opener; we have a cliche of a mystery surrounding this space station. Written by DC FOntana, but heavily rewritten by Gene Roddenberry itself, we have a mixed bag, saved ultimately by Q himself. 6/10

The Naked Now -- Gee, after a 2 hour premiere and THIS is what we get next? A re-write of a original series episode, but not updated to flesh out characters, but instead to get characters to touch each others' flesh? Worse, Kiddie Wonderboy, aka Wesley Crusher, saves the grown-ups' bacon for the first (of many) times. Make me a club sandwich out of this turkey, please. 1/10

Code of Honor -- Um, ok... Blaxploitation in 1987? It gives Yar something to do... well, more than just conspiring to grab Data's special spanner from the previous episode... *cough* It's entertaining, but what's its point? 6/10

The Last Outpost -- the first ferengi story, but the real clincher is what he crew need to do to escape -- answer some questions. The feel of the piece is rather vague; without polish and if there's substance, it's not easy to find. 5/10

Where No One Has Gone Before -- the Enterprise is flung nearly 3 million light years from its current position due to an accident. Despite being early on in the show, this one tries to act alien with the region of space they enter. I'll give it that. 7/10

Lonely Among Us -- While escorting diplomats to a neutral planet, the Enterprise is bombarded by an energy field and something enters the ship... this was rather a good episode; if anything, it should have been held for later in the season, if not a later season. The story wants us to know the characters, which would make their possessed states that much creepier. Instead, it comes across hokey. It had potential, but came about at the wrong time. 6/10

Justice -- Sooner or later, I'd have to mention this one. The crew come to an "idyllic" planet that seems blissful. Just don't break ANY law as there is only one punishment: Execution. So if you're going to commit a crime, don't do it when the secret police (wearing just as little as everyone else, of course) are present and their appearance is random. Worse, our Wonderbrat, I mean Wesley, trips over a fence and crushes a weed at just the wrong time. The playgirl centerfolds, oops the secret police, come and take him away. Apart from showing scantily clad people who seem to do nothing more than engage in foreplay with one another (what do they eat, or did they imply they eat each others' tongues?!) Of course, Cap'n Picknose wants Wonderbrat back. And that's when the big cloaked spaceship appears and things get all scary. Oh Lordy, why did I explain this garbage with even this much detail?! 1/10

The Battle -- The ferengi are back, to avenge themselves on Picard. With a mind control device. Incredibly underrated, this episode. One really feels for Picard and can only cheer at Daimon Bok's fate.) 8/10

Hide and Q -- Q is back and he has something to offer Riker: Acceptance in the Q Continuum. Corny at times, especially the dialogue, this one too is underrated and starts to show that the Q, or at least this one member of the Q, has an interest in humanity. 8/10

Haven -- Ah, the Troi episode revolving around an arranged marriage, and the inopportune arrival of a ship containing a different suitor... In a word, forgettable. 4/10

The Big Goodbye -- A decent episode; a holodeck program malfunctions while Picard and Crusher are living out one of his fantasies as a detective. As a result, they are trapped and holographic objects CAN kill, much to their surprise. Long before holodeck malfunctions became the basis of umpteen episodes, we have this one. No wonder later stories also featured the holodeck breaking down. :D 7/10

DataLore -- the ship returns to Data's homeworld and they find another "Data" in storage. Sadly, they put it together... Now ignore the mix-ups regarding who uses contractions and who gets the right Data for the wrong one. Production gaffes aside, this is probably the best episode made so far, and the show's best use of the Crystalline Entity. 9/10

Angel One -- Riker and the Planet of the Hot Chix. 'nuff said. 1/10

11001001 -- The Enterprise's main computer is hijacked by a race of beings that built up their own physical forms with computers to an extent where "codependence" is an understatement, but made the organic failing of inducing disaster recovery in the event of solar flares. I love this story! The Riker/Minuet plot is phenomenal, and feels like a 44 minute movie. 9/10

Too Short a Season -- Retired admiral Jameson wants to negotiate with a former foe. Sadly, he is using a medication developed by an alien species, thinking it will de-age him. The subplot on handing out weapons to villagers and all is almost an anti-allegory to TOS' "A Private Little War", but the drama between Jameson, his wife, and Karnas more than makes up for it. 8/10

When the Bough Breaks -- ah, the first of many "Win our candy bar commercial, appear on this new kids' show!!" A species with an impenetrable cloaking shield thinks the only way to save their race is to bring in Enterprise children and have them live on the planet. Its heart is in the right place, but it's absolutely daft: Why not take a bunch of baboons into your house, force them to stay, and say they're your offspring?! Great visual f/x, though... 6/10

Home Soil -- the anti-terraforming episode. Does a good job on its budget, has an engaging plot, and some terrific subterfuge that we didn't need Troi saying "Someone is deceiving us". Walter Gotell costars. 7/10

Coming of Age -- While Wesley takes a starfleet entrance exam, Picard's competency is questioned. 2 things: 1. Given how Wonderbrat saves the ship every week and HE can't get into the academy?! 2. If Wonderbrat saves the ship all the time and not Picard's hand-picked crew, no wonder his competency is questioned... still, this episode is a prelude to an upcoming episode... 2/10

Heart of Glory -- we finally get some Klingons (renegade Klingons), and how to see like Geordi. There is a mystery to both the renegades and their proper government, and the death scream ritual is interesting... 6/10

The Arsenal of Freedom -- Oooh, the saucer separates!! Okay, it's about a race of galactic mercenaries who developed a weapon that ultimately destroyed themselves. It's still running and the Enterprise responds to the automated greeting system. Hilarity does not ensue when the sentinels keep improving themselves and just about wipe everyone out... corny at times, this has the feel of adventure many needed at the time. 8/10

Symbiosis -- "Just say no". Maybe to Tasha's whiny rant about where she came from, of which we'd need to take those drugs in order to listen to that again. Still, the Crusher/Picard ethical argument is worthy. Oh, that's Dr Crusher. Not Wonderbrat; he'd be encouraging everyone to pop the pills... 3/10

Skin of Evil -- Tasha dies, nobody bats an eyelid. Picard has to deal not only with a big oil slick blob of an alien, but a blubbering Troi too. A VERY creepy episode; underrated. 8/10

We'll Always Have Paris -- When ripping the fabric of space as a hobby, don't show your wife to the starship captain who beams on down. Especially if she was in a 1960s folk/rock group. 4/10

Conspiracy -- fuzzy pink crabs seem unusual as a formidable force, but this is a great episode, and in the middle of Starfleet HQ too. It resolves the mini-arc started in "Coming of Age". 7/10

The Neutral Zone -- hammy to an extent even William Shatner could not emulate, this one at least brings in outposts having been scooped up by some unknown, big force. (the Borg) Note the screen Troi reads: it's one example of many that the producers loved the BBC show "Doctor Who"... Add in some cornball music and it's tacky. But they play it with a straight face, just don't ask how. 5/10

Well, the fledgling series suffered mostly from not having its own identity, living in the shadow of Kirk's era, an inexperienced production team given the amount of gaffes, Data's contractions, and so on, it's amazing season 2 ever got commissioned. But there are some gems, or at least stories that would have been gems if more competently produced. And season 2 proves they found more competent people.

Rotten delivery on every line, just horrid. Wesley was obnoxious but she was excruciating to watch.

I always root for the mud monster. :P