Back from a first date. He said to email him. So I am.

We saw Ironman and had dinner. (ordered the same thing.)

I never know how these things are supposed to end.

Or are you talking about the e-mail? :)

how DO you end them?

well, it's embarassing to say how long.

Any first date that ends with a sign of affection (a kiss, a lingering touch or hug, nookie, bondage,...) is a good ending.

Guys tend to be straight forward, "email me" means "email me". Generally, that means you made a good first impression. He didn't feel a "spark" but he's willing to give you another shot.

Also, dinner good...avoid movies (sitting quietly in the dark next to each other is a waste of early dates...movies are only good for dates later on so that if the movie sucks you can make-out instead.) on early dates in favor of something which facilitates communication and the possibility of connection. I recommend coffeehouses, art shows, light-competitive activities (I've had success with go-kart racing...just make sure you're dressed for it. Then there is always Quizzo...nothing beats winning crappy prizes in a bar quiz competition.), light craft activities; make it your own, pick things you enjoy. Something that during or after you can sit and talk and hopefully be charming and funny.

I think he suggested the movie so he could avoid having to talk a lot. It worked though, he sent me an email at six in the morning saying he was "too excited to sleep."

*laughs*

Well, I haven't dated in over 40 years, but back then...

You said goodnight at the door, and maybe had a kiss or two...

And then you went in your house, alone...

That's how!


:hi:

I was confuzed. Was he supposed to give me a sign he was actually interested in him like a phone number?

This is just the first date...

How long have you known him?

I wouldn't rush it...

See where it goes...

problem is that I am SUPER IMPATIENT WOMAN and I have no idea if a guy likes me or not. Usually not. But I guess I will see.

let him wait just long enough that he checks his email every 5 minutes, then send it to him.

If you like him and felt a spark, write him ASAP. Playing games is disingenuous and not necessary.

i can say a little cat and mouse is never a bad thing. It naturally develops needed sexual and emotional tension, and it leaves a little mystery on the table.

way more fun.

:evilgrin:

Sounds like it's going pretty well thus far. Just be yourself and have a good time. If he's the right one for you, it will work out.

on edit: i'm so 1995

Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but that caught my eye. You drove him to his car, and he said "Keep in touch."

No.

That's just nothing. Nothing at all. Are you going to email him because he told you to? Why isn't he emailing you?

No.

When two people connect, you're not left feeling confused. Trust your guts on this one. You're done with him.

... but perhaps something. If there is a cultural difference there may well be a difference in how he approaches dating from what you expect. But I wouldn't give up on him so soon if you were at all interested. He may be a bit shy or unsure of how you feel about him, especially since the movie time took away opportunities to communicate directly.

difference.

He did email me back and was so excited apparently that he misspelled half the words. Too adorable. :party:

... and seemed to be enjoying himself, I'd give it another shot. He may well be thinking about little else other than you and the great time he had.

At least he didn't say "African Americans don't want to work while the Mexicans will work their tails off":
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7707089

:-)

he seemed to be interested and he did say that he was going to be free next saturday...

his words in the email back to me.

My date is 32 and has never been married.

The original response was to someone else. Got mixed up.

I think you're in for a wild ride if your date was from Taiwan. I lived in Taipei for a year, and, believe me, it's a whole different world. Very interesting..

Let him teach you about his cuisine, for starters.

Men enjoy the chase and "hunt" and you can safely ignore them for a while, let 3 or 4 phone messages go unanswered, don't even read his e-mail, just do your own thing and make him work to get to you. When you run from them, they run after you, but if you run to them, they run away.

I don't see it as a game but as an accurate reflection of human nature.

What about when a guy doesn't call to leave a message three times because anything beyond once or twice seems desperate and clingy? Any woman who took your advice would never get a second date with me.

does it make them want them more?

not quite the same thing but I have this woman I'm only semi-interested in who emails me and I email her back when I feel like it...and she responds immediately...and the process continues.

These days, if a woman doesn't return a phone call or an e-mail, I assume she is not interested. I've had enough bad experiences with actual girlfriends not returning calls that this would make a very bad impression.

It appears he enjoyed yours, or he wouldn't have suggested that you email him. :thumbsup:

If you didn't really enjoy his company, I wouldn't worry at all about how these things are supposed to end. :shrug:

that way you can share and feed each other off your plates.

and you, personally, should always order a spaghetti dish on the off chance you will share a noodle, and then while each is slurping the noodle... your faces will come in contact...

and then kiss...

of course this all works so much better if you are eating said meal in the alley behind the resturant...



i kid, i kid... good luck to you and i wish nothing but the best. i am a hopeful romantic. and you never know...

a second date with anyone other than the most desperate loser.

tonight, when you go to sleep (i do this all the time to start my dreams)...

think of something nice happening from this first date. maybe not the one, maybe not happily ever after, just something nice.

like a nice second date. maybe some flowers. maybe a walk and talk that ends in laughs.

(me? i would start with a shared noodle, slurped together, that ends in a kiss. but that's me.)


tomorrow is full of possibility. the past is gone. smile, dream, and be a hopeful like me. what do you have to lose. tonight...





ugh, spell...

plugged up whenever I use my CPAP machine...boy Dr. Decampo was right on me using that nasel spray.

this is fairly standard courting procedure nowadays for people under the age of 45-50. Mutual courting has somewhat displaced male-centric courting (Men are expected still to make the first approach, although there is almost-zero stigma left to woman asking men out.)

Honestly, I'd probably break up with a woman for taking this POV. It's both masochistic and misandric.

It's been over 30 years since I have been out on a "date,"
so any advice I would have to offer would come from a history
book!

(I lucked out early, been with the same partner since 1974,
so I know about as much about dating today as Bush knows about
military strategy, and that's precious little indeed!)