I am having a lot of trouble sleeping lately.

Mostly I have attributed it to stress from finishing my thesis and doing my thesis defense but now that that is over (I passed by the way) I find myself worried about lots of other things.

I am starting to apply for jobs and will most likely have to move, maybe not very far (200 miles or less) but I have been dating this great guy who is very supportive and actually encouraging me to find the right job, no matter where it is. But I really, really don't want to go. It's going to hurt a lot and this is the best relationship I have ever had, the one with the most potential. The long-distance thing is so hard and never works out. But he has said things that make it seem like he is willing to move also, eventually anyway.

And now an email from my little sister. She is worried about my mom, who recently fell and bruised her face. This is the second time in six months that has happened. She is not elderly, only 61 but she has not taken good care of herself. I think she drinks too much. A couple (maybe more) glasses of wine a night. Every night. She doesn't drink during the day and it hasn't affected her otherwise (it has been about the same for many years). Well that might be the reason for the falls I suppose. But I still think she ought to be checked out by a doctor. She will refuse to go, though. She hasn't been in a very long time and I guess she is afraid that he or she will tell her to stop smoking and lose weight. She is very sedentary.

The problem is that I do not know how to approach the subject with her. I hate talking about difficult things. My usual approach is avoidance and hoping someone else brings it up instead of me.

I have concerns about some of my relatives too. But lately I have had to just put things on ignore out of fear of myself going crazy.

Yes it can drive you crazy.

My sister has been married 32 years to a guy she long distanced for 7 years.

Second, you may need to do an intervention with your mom. Get relatives who are concerned and sit down and talk to her. Years ago, my sister called and made an appointment for my mother because she had a lump on her jaw but would not call the doctor. The day of the appointment, we all sat down with her and told her what was up. She relented and we all took her. Turns out it was serious, but if she hadn't gone when she did, it could have been so much worse.

Remember one thing, you cannot control anything outside of yourself. Take it a day at a time. If you can't sleep, don't worry about it. Just be sure to take care of you.

None of us live close enough to do an intervention, unfortunately. But I will be seeing them in August, so maybe then.