It's 5:02 in California... - Democratic Underground

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:02 PM
Original message

It's 5:02 in California...

tell me, straight married people, how many of your marriages have collapsed in the past minute and 30 seconds??

And California? :loveya: :woohoo:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

LeftyMom

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:04 PM
Response to Original message

1. I feel even more divorced than I did five minutes ago.

I'm sure The Gays are to blame.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:06 PM
Response to Reply #1

2. Of course they are!

I think this whole thing was secretly supported by divorce lawyers.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:06 PM
Response to Original message

3. I am leaving my husband, will you marry me?

:silly:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:09 PM
Response to Reply #3

4. Heck yeah!

Turns out Teh Gay IS contagious!

I do feel bad about your marriage though. Poor thing never stood a chance against TEH AGENDA.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:30 PM
Response to Reply #4

14. LOL - which conversion prize do you want? The toaster or the panini grill?

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:37 PM
Response to Reply #14

22. Panini Grill!!!

OOOOOH, I love TEH GAY Conversion Prizes!

:woohoo:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:44 PM
Response to Reply #22

28. I was going to hold out for the plasma TV

but I am thinking I may get the espresso machine!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:48 PM
Response to Reply #28

30. Oh wait, what?? A plasma TV?!

I need the whole "So You Caught Teh Gay? Here's Your Prize" catalog!

I don't want to settle for some crappy Panini grill if I can get a Sony Bravia, damn it!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:49 PM
Response to Reply #30

32. They have not started offering the plasma TV yet.

But I have heard rumors...

:D

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:53 PM
Response to Reply #32

36. Oh, I get it...

they're waiting to see how successful this gay-marriage-turns-everyone-gay plot is before they offer the plasma TV. That must be their back-up plan!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

DeposeTheBoyKing

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:16 PM
Response to Original message

5. Ours is still intact

I was thinking about this earlier.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:18 PM
Response to Reply #5

6. Well beware...

it could take a few hours to get to Texas. ;)

In all seriousness, I honestly hope this is a tide-turning event.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

DeposeTheBoyKing

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:30 PM
Response to Reply #6

13. I hope so too

How can anyone think that gay marriage somehow disturbs the fabric of society? Shouldn't everyone get to unite with the one they love (if they want to) and the rights that accompany that act?

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:32 PM
Response to Reply #13

15. Seems blantantly obvious to us, yes

of course they should be able too.

Unfortunately, I know many people for whom it is not so obvious. I don't understand them. I don't WANT to understand them. But I hold out hope that someday (hopefully soon), their opinions won't matter anymore.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Arugula Latte

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:23 PM
Response to Original message

7. OMG!!1! I feel the rumbles and waves of Peviness and Immorality

seeping up over the border from Cali-SodomandGomorrah-fornia!!!1!1!

What will we tell Teh Chiiiiiildren???!/1?!

:scared:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:26 PM
Response to Reply #7

8. You're about to be Californicated!!

RUUUUUNNNNNN!!! Head for Idaho, quick! You should be safe there!! :rofl:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:26 PM
Response to Reply #8

9. I hear Utah is a good place for escaping teh gay!

:rofl:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

dubeskin

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:27 PM
Response to Original message

10. My MOMS are going to feel it tomorrow though when they are legally married!!

It's about time!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:33 PM
Response to Reply #10

16. Congratulations!!!

To you and your Moms. May tomorrow be everything they've dreamed of.

:hug:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Reverend_Smitty

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:27 PM
Response to Original message

11. I think "teh gay" is even messing with our weather all the way out on the east coast!

I was driving home from class and it was both *raining* and *sunny* all at the same time!!!11!!! Too bad I didn't see a rainbow then I would have *known* it was a sign :P

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:34 PM
Response to Reply #11

18. Oh shit!!

Rainbow-inducing weather on the EAST COAST?! It's spreading faster than we thought! Save the children! Hurry!!!

:P

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

ghostsofgiants

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:28 PM
Response to Original message

12. I've never been married...

Edited on Mon Jun-16-08 07:29 PM by primate1

But I can already sense the impending collapse of any possible marriage the distant future might hold.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:35 PM
Response to Reply #12

19. Me too.

I had hoped to someday get married in a state which still hold my union sacred and refuses to acknowledge the basic human rights of a large portion of society. Alas, my dreams are shattered.

Unless I move to Utah.

I really hope this isn't necessary, but... :sarcasm:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

ghostsofgiants

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:49 PM
Response to Reply #19

33. Shit, I'm Canadian, my future marriage was ruined a few years ago.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Liberal Veteran

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:33 PM
Response to Original message

17. This just in! Freak fiery hail and brimstone raining from sky!

But first, let's look in on important news: Brittney Spears has a hangnail!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:36 PM
Response to Reply #17

20. Oh thank you!

Edited on Mon Jun-16-08 07:37 PM by huskerlaw

Geez, for a minute there, we all lost track of the important things in life. Poor Britney!!! Thankfully she (and her hangnail) are safe and secure in Nevada...away from the spreading GAY.

Now go protect yourself from the fiery hail and brimstone!!!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Oeditpus Rex

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:37 PM
Response to Original message

21. Y'know, seriously

I'd like to see divorce statistics since Massachusetts led the way four years ago.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:39 PM
Response to Reply #21

23. I would too, actually

Would be nice to throw some stats in a few faces, yes?

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Oeditpus Rex

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:43 PM
Response to Reply #23

26. Indeed

I love beating people over the head with the cold, hard facts they'd rather ignore. :D

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Kutjara

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:40 PM
Response to Original message

24. I have suddenly developed a strange urge...

...to marry my cat. I understand this is linked with gay marriage in some undefinable, yet absolutely scientifically proven, way.

I also feel that the sanctity of marriage has been defiled. So does my wife. My mistress agrees.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:42 PM
Response to Reply #24

25. I hear you're safe

until you start lusting after a box turtle. Then, you need to worry.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Kutjara

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:44 PM
Response to Reply #25

27. That's the benchmark?

Thanks for the info, that's good to know. I don't wanna be no preevert or nothin'.

They do have nice shells, though...

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

KitchenWitch

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:46 PM
Response to Reply #25

29. Geez, we may need to deprogram LaraMN

She has been pining for a box turtle for MONTHS!

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:49 PM
Response to Reply #29

31. UH OH!

You're right! She was even going to lie to her husband about it!

...and Teh Gay Agenda kills another marriage... :cry:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

CaliforniaPeggy

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:50 PM
Response to Original message

34. My dear huskerlaw!

I dunno!

My 43 year old marriage suddenly feels very teetery...:scared:

Have I caught ...the gay???

:rofl: :rofl:

:hi:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:51 PM
Response to Reply #34

35. Oh maaaannn...

Or woman (the choice is now yours, after all)...

Your poor marriage! Won't somebody think of the straight people for once?!

I think you need to whip out the plastic sheeting and duct tape that you bought to save yourselves from teh terra-ists. Maybe that would fed off Teh Gay!

:rofl:

:hug:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

GOPisEvil

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:55 PM
Response to Original message

37. You've gone and done it now, California.

It even feels cold here in Texas.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:56 PM
Response to Reply #37

38. Just cold?

I thought hell was supposed to freeze over!

Oh wait, you're in Austin. Might want to check the forecast in Houston...could be calling for ice storms tonight...

:P

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

GOPisEvil

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:57 PM
Response to Reply #38

41. Well, the air temperature is in the upper 90s.

I'm sure the cold from Hell will work its way to the surface eventually. :D

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

AlCzervik

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:56 PM
Response to Original message

39. still married but i'm thinking about getting a divorce just so i can blame it on gay marriage.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

huskerlaw

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Jun-16-08 07:57 PM
Response to Reply #39

40. You really should

you could get tons of sympathy from the Freepers that way.

That is, if you want sympathy from Freepers... :scared:

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

DU AdBot (1000+ posts)

Sat May 04th 2024, 10:10 AM
Response to Original message

Advertisements [?]

Top

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.