Do you think that some people are magnets for being treated badly?

I've noticed in the past that some people just get backstabbed, talked about, and generally shit on, many times for no good reason.

Now, I'm thinking I may be one of those people. I thought that being good to people, and doing your best in life mattered... but people still smile to my face and fuck me over behind my back.

What gives, lounge?

(this is personal, btw... no one here is involved)

Some people definitely get more shit than others, and if you get a lot of shit it generally falls into piles of one kind or another.

I get a lot more painful medical shit than the vast majority of people. So do some other people here. Some people get a lot more relational shit than most other people.

And some people have pretty charmed lives, but don't take the time to realize that or appreciate it.
:shrug:

about me. I go out of my way to help people and be good to people... but apparently it doesn't matter.

:(

You seem like a really good person.

None of us deserve the shit that gets thrown at us. :hug:

In many ways, I'm one of the charmed ones, despite a lot of past shit, and some inconsequential current shit. My life as an adult has been a very fortunate one, in which I've lived many places, experienced more than most people, met the love of my life in my forties and now have the sweetest, smartest child in the universe. I have a great, secure job in which I'm appreciated and a beautiful home. It took me many years to get past the shit of my childhood, but now I count my blessings every day at the fortune I have later in my life.

I'm sorry for your medical shit piles... I wish I or anyone could scoop them up in a bucket and get them away from you. But you handle it so well, with so much class and with so much compassion for others. I admire you very much.

:hug:

I'm very glad that you life has developed into so many really good things. I hope that endures. :)

I don't know how much class I have. Mostly I think I just hang on tight and try very hard not to take out my pain on the people around me. I'm not afraid to let people know that I'm in pain, because nobody can help if they don't know what's going on. But at the same time, I terrified of making my pain into someone else's issue. :(

"don't take no fuckin' shit from no one kid."

They test for weakness constantly, and exploit it when they find it to get whatever sick thing it is they want.

What you or I might consider good character, a sociopath sees as weakness. The purer the heart, the greater the thrill to the predator.

the status quo wants the truth to be revealed. They want things to stay just like they are, safe and secure. Don't go bucking the system even though the system is SNAFU.

Elsewhere as well.

And here's the irony: If you roll over and take the abuse, you're called a wimp. If you fight against it, you're called a troublemaker. :banghead:

There are people who live to abuse others and people who live to be abused.

mark

bad people will always backstab and shit on people. That is there way and they are not likely to change, because they encounter nice people.

I've apparently been trying to be friends with the wrong people. I need to be more discerning.

a combination of these factors?

definitely, probably, not sure, and probably not

I think it comes down to needing to be more selective in my friend choices.

have an eye for the one who has some weakness and is perceived as being easy to pick on. The "weakness" may not be a real weakness; it may be something such as, you're new in the area and don't have friends/relatives to rally to your side.

Some people just suck. Seems like to me I used to attract more than my share of sexual predators--I'm quiet and pretty much a loner. I think lots of guys perceive a woman like that as easy prey.

There are some advantages to getting older! :-) I don't encounter that so much any more.

Some good responses here, especially #6, 7, and 9.

do seem to be more susceptible. I'm not a believer in blaming them. There are people out there who view being nice, honest and ethical as weak or naive. There are others who talk about and back stab everyone, even their best friends. There are people who see someone else doing a good job and look for things to pick at because for whatever reason they feel someone else doing a good job makes them look bad. Some are personal, I've seen a person get piled on because people thought she had no problems in her life or because they thought she looked a certain way or led a certain lifestyle.

It just isn't my opinion, I've been told this stuff by the people who victimize others.

it's becoming clearer to me all the time.. there's something about me- people either want to help me a lot or upset me a lot. Sometimes the same people want to do both, they really like me but they can't resist hurting me either. It's weird. I think it's people who can tell I don't get too attached to them. Like the other day I was sititng at a table working with a lot of women and the one next to me said something that hurt my feelings so bad, it was totally rude how she acted, but then when she said bye to me she just gushed about how great she thinks I am. Now days later I'm still hurt by what she said?

I am never surprised anymore by how horrible some members of my species are. Also I've learned age doesn't necessarily mean someone deserves respect, it just mean they're a lot older than me and somehow lived all those years without learning much.

let me ask you this...

How much of it has to do with size discrimination? (discrimination is not the right word, but you know what I'm saying)

I'm an overweight guy and I've noticed some consistency between people's 'overweightness' and their propensity for being shit on...

I'm not saying that's what this is, but I wanted to throw it out there - see what you guys think....

"DISCUSS"