do these things compare?

Critizing/talking about a grown man who is still living with his, mom. Not because she needs his help. But he has spoiled him. he works as a bag boy at a store. He could get a better job, he has no health problems. He has just been spoiled by his mom. She does not make him pay any bills or help out with the household chores. He just lives there. Btw he is close to 40. He has no car. either he drives his moms's or she takes him to work. He has been like this all of his life. He doesn't do anything b/c she lets him get away with it.
I was moody b/c I had a someone try to set me up with him. And set up it would be.

someone told me that me talking about this moocher (and that is what he is doing..) is the same as someone poking fun of someone for the way they look, their weight, their disablity etc.

Those things can't be helped. However, the guy is just lazy and spoiled. has been spoiled by his mother. She does everything for him. Up to putting up his laundrey. I could understand if he was menatll handicapped. But he is not. No ilness of any sort.

I'm getting a lecture on a message where I was talking in between friends only. one of my friends told me that i was being mean by complaining about the dude.
Maybe i am...but I can't stand to see someone mooching off their mom. I understand that someone may lose their job and may have to go to their parents for help. but how many people would just do nothing to help their parents out? Even if it was to buy some food, or cook dinner? How many would have your mom fold your underroos for you? or sit there on the computer all day while your mom was cleaning the house?

(yes, his mom is to blame too).

But anyhow (Excuse the not making any sense. my meds are kicking in).

Me talking about a moocher...worse a mom moocher..to someone talking about me having MS. Or talking about someone who has a crappy job but is still doing what they can. and would feel bad if they had to go to their parents for help.

I've known other guys, who refused to work or would be fired from differnet jobs b/c they ener showed up for work. Their girlfriends would have to support both of them..as well as do all the housework.

To me, Moocher is not the same as somene who has fallen on hard times due lay offs or an illness.

Moocher are just people that got spoiled by their parents.

did I make any sense? I'm stoned off my meds.

what are you comparing?

you with MS to a Mom Moocher?

is that the parallel you are trying to make?

people judging me for having MS. And not dating me.

to me not wanting to go out with a guy, who mooches off his mother. (mom moocher..I have a language all of my own). I kind of resent any able adult who lives with his mother w/out helping her in any way. (even if it's doing some work in the yard. instead, he sits on the compter on his offtime and play games).

Are you saying that you know for a fact the guy does not have some mental/emotional illness...

I know. his mom just spoiled him and has not cut the apron strings.

I've known other people like this. They go from job to job. Don't show up b/c they just don't feel like going into work. and they do this one day too many..and they get fired.

Of course, when they find a gf...they expect the girlfriend to take care of them.

to be fair, I know that there are women out there that do this too.

me? I want a partner that i can share my life with. Not someone who is going to take advantage of me. and expect me to work full time, pay all the bills and do all the house work. while he does nothing.

who has no ambition. That is my opinion, for what it is worth. I am sure there are others on here who will disagree with me.

Maybe he didn't graduate from high school? There aren't a lot of good jobs out there and it is difficult to find work that will support you.

but that's not the point. I didn't finish college...my job is not the best. But at least I'm paying my bills.

However, even if he has to stay with his mom...he could help out. Even if it's cooking, working in the yard..washing clothes. whatever. Not expect his mom to do it all.
she even puts his clothes away for him.

he is healthy. both mentally and physically. If that were not the case, I could understand. however he does have the money to eat out. So he could help out more at home. But he does not. either he hangs out with his friends or he plays on the computer when he is not at work.


*note* I know that his mom is guilty of spoiling him. she should have put her foot down a long time ago. let him wash his own clothes for once.

I have an ovarian cyst that is very painful, painful to the fact that I can't walk or bend over to pick something up without a lot of pain. So I lost my job, cos I couldn't work. Even when I was working I made very little money. BTW: I am a college graduate and I did very well in college, but it has been really difficult for me to get a job, even though I have a degree. :(

When I was healthy, I helped around the house by doing the dishes and the laundry. All I can do now is basically clear my place, bring in the mail, and take back the empty trash cans... :(

I don't know about this guy, but I wouldn't be so quick to judge him. How well do you know him?

that he is healthy. He goes out and buys lunch. He works. He just does't contribute anything to the house. His mom does it all.

I do know..what it is like to be sick. I've dealt with some really bad ms flares. But I did what I could (and since I live by myself, it was up to me to get things done that needed to be done).
and I do know what it is like to work crappy jobs. I spent four years working at mcdonalds before I got a job at a print shop. I was laid off from there...moved over to mail opening. I got sick and could not do the job and was moved over to the job I have now. BUT that job is in the process of being outsourced and I am having to look for other jobs...while I am killing myself having to work OT. Depsite the fact that my doctor does not want me to.

This guy is like some other guys I have know. Momma's boys. And once the momma kicks them out of the nest, they found women who are wiling to put up with their shit. go from job to job. Keep getting fired for doing things like not showing up. and don't do anything around the house. even if they are not working...they sit all day or go hang with their friends. and these guys are healthy. It sucked to see my friends struggling to do it all..while the lazy guys did nothing.

*note* I do know that there are women like this out there too. and they are just as bad.


Anyhow.. someone was comparing the fact that I have MS and get judged to this guy who is healthy who refuses to help his mom out just a little. when he is able to do so.

you are entitled to decide for yourself what kind of person you want to date...

you are not mean for choosing not to be around this person. If you want something different, that's your prerogative.