A life long friend of my daughter confessed stealing from me a few years ago: what to do?

Ptah

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Oct-20-08 11:49 PM
Original message

Poll question: A life long friend of my daughter confessed stealing from me a few years ago: what to do?

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Roon

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Oct-20-08 11:50 PM
Response to Original message

1. and put your purse away eom

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Ptah

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 12:04 AM
Response to Reply #1

5. She's intelligent, can't hide it from her.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Fire Walk With Me

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Oct-20-08 11:54 PM
Response to Original message

2. Cage her and exhibit her at a zoo as the "Last Honest Person".

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Connonym

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Mon Oct-20-08 11:56 PM
Response to Original message

3. Did you suspect the friend at the time?

Sorry, that's just being nosy. But I do think it's very honorable of him/her to confess to you at this point. I would opt for forgiveness and, as someone else stated, make sure she's not alone with your purse again.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Ptah

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 12:01 AM
Response to Reply #3

4. The value was small.

The actual loss was trust.

The items taken were trivial.

She's an adult now

We're good

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Skittles

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 03:24 AM
Response to Reply #3

6. what kind of forgiveness involves no trust?

if you don't trust them, you don't really forgive them....I'm sure someone who felt that bad for that long, driving her to confess, won't be repeating the same act

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Gormy Cuss

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 09:02 AM
Response to Reply #6

8. Forgiving the past doesn't mean you automatically trust the person.

In some spiritual disciplines one may be required to trust the person, but forgiveness only requires that you pardon the person for the offense. By forgiving you have opened the way for building trust but it is not an automatic event. If you had a lot of trust in the person before the incident, it may be easy to trust again. If you didn't then the person gets to earn trust the same way as any new person who comes into your life, by whatever standard you use.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

MrSlayer

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 05:42 AM
Response to Original message

7. Has she offered recompense?

I can't vote until I know.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Ptah

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Wed Oct-22-08 09:31 PM
Response to Reply #7

10. Yes, she has more than compensated for my loss.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

PassingFair

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Tue Oct-21-08 10:01 AM
Response to Original message

9. What did she take?

When my girls were little, there were a few
friends who liberated their toys.

To my knowledge, nothing of any value was ever
taken, and I had long talks with some of them
when I caught them red-handed.

I never told anyone's parents, but I told the
girls that they would not be allowed to play
here if they took anything else.

No big deal.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

Ptah

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Wed Oct-22-08 09:33 PM
Response to Reply #9

11. Let's call it liquor cabinet level theft.

Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top

DU AdBot (1000+ posts)

Tue May 07th 2024, 01:26 PM
Response to Original message

Advertisements [?]

Top

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.