Do you know what it's like to like/love a girl you'll never have?

I do. Right now. And it's eating me up inside. :(

It's worse than depression. I know this. :(

(Kidding, kidding.)

You're a stellar friend and wonderful man, and you deserve every good thing in life. :hug:

but I know what it's like to like/love a guy I'll never have.

I'm sorry you have to have that sucky feeling. It's horrible.

:(

I really liked a guy in one of my classes for years. I did dance with him once though, so I guess that helped.

been there.

But yeah. Ate up the best years of my 20s. Kinda like Dubya.

not a woman?

:yoiks:

Why don't you give one of them a shot instead of focusing on one that's unattainable?

Seriously, that pain youre feeling has a silver lining. Its called inspiration, go do something with it. Write a novel or a song, paint, make a snowman.. anything. You are blessed and lucky to feel such strong but unrequited (I know I had to have spelled that wrong) Love. Whats more is that there is someone else out there wanting/needing your love that does not have it yet. Its a beautiful thing the ability to cry and hurt over love that can not be.

Seriously, find a creative type project or two you can really throw yourself into and once you start losing yourself in the spirit of that project this pain and its reasons will be made much clearer to you.

Lastly and again, be happy to at least be able to feel this way... believe it or not there are millions who never know such passion.

Yes, it hurts. And it will hurt for the remainder of our life cycles, yours and mine, regarding the loves we will never build a relationship with.

It hurts. Just find a distraction or two. Or three. It will get easier with time, but the pang of pain never quite goes away. She has her life. You have your own.

You control the emotion. You've got to.

Do not let the emotion control you.


:pals:

(a guy, that is)

Spending time with him and talking to him doesn't help. It just reminds me of all the things I love about him. In the long run, I know I can't have him in my life at all. Not like this. It's slowly eating me away. And you can't make someone love you.

:yoiks:

not even with those... ;)

(The assault weapon was a bit over the top.)

:evilgrin:

The more they are in your life it just reminds you... yeah...

its been suggested to me to make a list of all the things I don't like about her...

it isn't very long

:(

I can't make her love me the way I need to be loved... she loves me as a friend now. A few months ago she loved me and wanted to marry me.

For the moment, I've given up on even looking for love.

I'll take good friends. Good company.

My heart can't take it right now.

It's probably for the best, though, that I have been denied what I wanted. In my relationship experience, unless both sides are feeling the same amount of "longing" for each other, it never works out well. One-sided relationships are an emotional disaster for the person who feels more, and an awkward icky mess for the person who feels less.

Sometimes getting what you want turns out to be an enormous mistake.

I hope you feel less heart-achy soon.

:hug:

I've been able to put it to one side from time to time but it just keeps coming back and resurfacing. I just can't get her out of my mind. And, although it has gotten better with time, the yearning used to be intense and agonizing. Especially because she lived in a different country and I so rarely got to see her

eventually you learn to deal. :hi:

present tense
and yes, it sucks.
not getting any younger and my life is in neutral.

and lost it

and know you'll never get it back

and its really eating me up

actually disemboweled me at first

now just eating

:(

hang in there

how do you know ????

did you ask?

I'd think most people do actually.

just not the one we want it to be...

:(

RL

you just can't win.


Thanks for that earworm. :P

:9

RL

Sorry to say, but I've been in many situations of unrequited love and the only way it has ever gotten easier was to just move on completely, not try to be "just friends" with them - although in some cases it has taken me a LONG time to do that. Sometimes I just cling to a fantasy of what relationship I could have with that person. I tend to hang on endlessly, hoping that it still might happen, then finally giving up when it becomes so painful I can't stand it any more and realize for my own sanity and health I have to give up and move on. Or as a friend told me recently, "You like to toy with these things until the flavor runs out."

Letting go of that person is intensely painful, but only for a short time, and it's pain with a purpose. But hanging on to that person who doesn't love you or won't have the relationship with you that you want is also painful, and it's a pain that goes on forever as long as you hang on, and it serves no purpose.

especially when you have to run into that person at least once a week for the foreseeable future.

You can't change your circumstances so that you don't run into them at all?

however, on the last encounter, I think I may have been purposefully avoided, which is all for the best. I'm trying to learn lessons from my past for once: if you don't want to just be friends with someone, there's no point in trying to just be friends - loads of people end up frustrated and bothered at the least, or deeply hurt at the worst.

It's torture. :(

I've loved a woman I met freshman year of college ever since. I graduated in '94.

We never dated, for reasons I won't get into, and we've both gone on with our lives, but I've never stopped loving her. For your sake, I hope this doesn't end up like that.

I've recently finally really come to terms with the fact that we aren't together, and that she seems to be with a good guy, and I can be happy for her and ok with things as they are. Doesn't really change how I feel about her, but at least I'm more at peace with things.

If you can't be with this girl, I hope it doesn't take you 18 years to come to terms with that, as it has for me.

I use the pain and the joy to inspire me...

It sucked. Shit happens I guess.

kill your feelings :thumbsup:

Fortunately I finally found one who likes me back. But before that, it was a lot of sucky unrequitedness. For about 15 years straight, in fact.

..."typical." :nopity:

Yeah, it fucking kills. It hurts a lot, a million times over.

I've pined for some men horribly in my day. Kind of wish I could have some of those years back, but, hey, better to have loved...

Unrequited love sucks. I feel your pain.