Disturbing exchange in the parking lot today

I was driving through the parking lot at the grocery store just now and a lady walking sort of veered into the path of my car. I waved to acknowledge that I saw her and wasn't going to run her over. I pulled into a parking place which happened to be next to this lady's car. When I got out of my car she said, "you know, I wish you had hit me... I just got laid off" All I could do was say "oh no! I am so sorry..." then I said totally the wrong thing.... "I am out of work too, I know its getting ugly out there" It was one of those things that escaped before I really thought about it.I was trying to say she is not alone, but it came out ALL wrong. I felt so unbelievably bad. She was so upset... I know everyone is feeling the pinch and hers is not a new story.... but aaaghhh. I can't get it out of my mind.


edited because I used the wrong word and it was bugging me

It sounds as though you were just trying to empathize with her.

Poor lady.

but she started crying in earnest after I said what I said. That made me feel even worse.

I doubt your comment had anything to do with making her cry. It was probably the worry, anger and frustration over losing her job and maybe that all just peaked at the same time you crossed her path.

You were obviously trying to be consoling to her, and I hope she knew that.

The last thing I wanted was to make her MORE upset.

and scary!

You were right to be upset at almost having hit her. :scared:

Something similar happened to me when I lived in D.C.. late at night, New York Ave, NE D.C. Was driving home and NY Ave leaving town on the way to MD is not a great neighborhood. This older AA man steps off the curb right in front of me! I think I stopped about 5 feet away from him. But he looked at me as if he were mad that I *didn't* hit him!

You didn't do anything wrong. I hope she got help though. Sounds like she's at the end of her tether. :hug:

I wish I knew more about it. She was walking with no bags, so she hadn't been shopping. I don't know if she was literally *just* laid off by Kroger, or if she was applying for work, or what. I just hope she is ok. I worry she might wreck her car deliberately or something on the way home. I wish I could have helped her, but sadly, I am in no position to do anything but comiserate.

and more than once, there were people standing on the divider, just standing. Not waiting to cross. Just standing.

I often wondered. I drove really carefully on that street........................

(a really nice lady, btw)was in tears...she said so many of her clients are out
of work and begging her to help with strategies to keep their heads above water
and under a roof.

Tikki

I am not surprised, but that doen't make it any easier to hear. I am one of those people hoping my taxes return will work out in my favor. I can't imagine what it is like working with a stream of people facing such hardships.

Dear oh dear.

verbal diarrea and would say things without thinking. I had a friend who had a boyfriend. They were good to me. Another friend and I ran into someone from public school and were talking about people. I said "Susan has a boyfriend and he's short". Not smart. I hope they never found out. But the way my life was going at the time they probably did. I was just so shy that stuff would come out without me thinking. My brain was busy being enormously preoccupied with being an introvert.

I spend a lot of time with my foot in my mouth. It is very embarrassing. I really try not to say ANYthing, especially around people I don't know because nine times out of ten I say the wrong thing. I hate it that I contributed to this distraught lady's stress. *sigh*

That counts. Don't be so hard on yourself.

could be a good business idea.

but then I'm a cold-hearted son of a bitch.

What you said was a simple statement of being in similar circumstances. I'm sure she cried in front of you because it felt safe to do so. You gave her a moment of companionship in her sorrow.

Thank you for reminding me of that. I hope it all works out for her.

and she was gonna cry no matter what.

You did all right.

You know, there's nothing "right" that anyone can say in situations like that. There just isn't.

Do not beat yourself up over this one, honey.

It is so hard with so much misery around.... and They say it hasn't really hit us in DFW yet.